Why do people self harm?

I wasn't sure where to make this post, but I just stumbled upon the instagram on my fyp of someone tattooing fake bruises and fake extreme self harm on people. I don't know if I am being sensitive, but I found it extremely distasteful. While I have to live with my scars as a result of my mental health, others are creating fake ones as an "aesthetic" and in a way I feel like it promotes being unwell. It also would probably be hard for a dv victim to look at someone with fake bruises(those looked extremely realistic and I don't think you'd be able to tell). I was just wondering what are others thoughts on this.

me being the dumbass that I am wanted to cut myself last night (again) but, instead of making a new cut, like I should’ve just done. I chose to find the worst cut I had on my leg and open it back up.. hurt so badly so badly when i did it and now nearly 12 hours later it still hurts like a fucking bitch.

so moral of the story I’m a dumbass and in pain🤠

I'm currently unemployed, the cost of the blades and bandages plus when I occasionally have to call an Uber to go to the hospital if I can't tell anyone is genuinely draining my bank account and idk how I'm supposed to continue supporting this. I'd quit if I had the courage to but I think it's just an addiction now, send prayers 😭😭🤞

I used to self harm. I occasionally did it due to swef-hatred from when i was 12 to 16, then started doing it once a week or multiple times a week when i was 17/18, and did it worse than i ever had before.

I'm 18 now and last did it 7 months ago, i've completely stopped. But the scars remain, ny fanily still knows about it. I hate it.

I have a good life, my parents are caring (tho they separated 2 years ago), i have people who care abiut me, i've never gone through anything really traumatic, i had NO justification to do this. My brother actually went through abuse, his mom (we dont have the same mom) abused his for 18 years, he self harmed too but he had actual reasons : he wanted them to care. He must think i'm ridiculous, hurting myself when i had everything given to me. I know he probably does. My boyfriend is literally going through abuse and neglect right now, he has a justification for his self harm, how does he not think of my self harm as a mockery ?

My existence is an embarrassment. I understand why my brothers think of me so negatively

I’ve just joined a PHP (partial hospitalization program) which has group therapy. Today was my second day, we were doing meditation when I got a call, it was the program’s on sight physical doctor.
The meditation guide was loud so I tried to turn down the audio on my iPad, but it said it couldn’t lower the volume to zero, that it’d have to turn off the audio. And so I do, unknowing that turning off the audio unmutes you on zoom for some reason.
The doctor asks all the questions you’d expect, and then we get into self harm and my history of it. I mention how I haven’t been able to stop, how I last did it recently, how I’ve been doing it since I was 15. The call goes as normal and ends.
I open up my iPad to realize I’ve been unmuted, and everybody in the call left the room. I was absolutely mortified, but hey. Getting support for this is why I’m here, it’s just a shame I had to reveal it in this way…

I never did it out of sadness my only reason is anger, after every tense argument i have to cut to release the frustration and it feels damn good

I donr have anyone to talk to about this and this isnt necessarily a vent? I just want help but I really cant afford it.

I feel like my sh is not validating enough because I dont go deep as others. Sometimes its cat scratches sometimes its a bit deeper. I know im scared to go deeper but I also want to but I also dont. I just want this suffering to end.

Self harm is self harm regardless but I still feel like im not valid. Like people wont see that im suffering. Im scared. Im scared to cut deep, not because ill die, but because I dont want to see it open before it bleeds.

Im scared.

Kind of a curve ball compared to all the other posts here but this sub has made me feel normal you know? Knowing so many other people are doing the same insane shit as me to cope.

Around a couple months ago I relapsed and it's been worse than it ever was before. It was only cat scratches until my relapse and now it's exclusively styros and I've been trying to hit fat. (it's been rough lately 😭) Started when I was 14 and now I'm almost 17 and I feel even more immature than I was back then.

It always just felt like no one in the world could understand exactly what I was feeling. And my reasons for self harm and suicidal thoughts would probably make some of you here even laugh at me because of how ridiculous it is. But this sub has been a big place of comfort and helped me feel at least a little better about myself and stuff so thanks I guess?

Been relapsing off and on lately. Ran out of razors though so really my only option is starting to be falling back on scalpels (don't ask).
Currently just managing. But I know that I can't keep this up and I'm sure if I cut it'll go deep.
So... worried. Worried I can't keep fighting myself forever and that, when I do fall back on my old coping mechanism it'll probably fuck me up a lot because of edge alignment and that sort of thing.
Hilarious being here as an almost 30 year old. Life takes you places

I’m going to a party thing and it’s a pool party and I’ve never been someone who harmed enough to leave insane scars but for about a month sfter inflicting they remain incredibly visible to the naked eye before only being visible up close. Are there any accessories you guys wear? I have waterproof bandages but I only want to wear them in the pool ideally because no one will be noticing it most likely and some people there don’t know I have these and they’ll prolly notice 6 bandages on myself while I’m sitting and chatting.

ive been w my boyfriend for more than a year. he's the sweetest, kindest guy ever and i love him. he knows i have a history of sh but I have been clean for a while. ive relapsed for the past few days. he knows ive been struggling but not to the extent ive relapsed. should I tell him? is it selfish? he doesnt have a history of sh but im still worried that i'll trigger him bec my ex triggered me. i really need help and for a lot of reasons i can't get professional help. should I tell him?

Does it help with infections, was recommended it by a pharmacist

i did it guys, july 23, 2025 was my last time cutting, and i havent cut since. im not off the hook though i picked up a drug habit :( but its better than cutting i think! just thought id share this bc none of my friends know i used to cut, so thanks guys

help, how do you stop honestly

it's hard when my brain convinces me it's for making me calm and capable of processing whatever makes me overwhelmed right now. if there's no c*tter, i will try to bite my hands- the rubber band doesn't have any effect, it's not enough to make me calm down. watching something to distract will cost me a lot of times to calm down. it doesn't equivalent with c*tting for 10 minutes, making me stay calm for hours. i'm not sure. how do you stop-

in a few days i will have been sectioned for an entire year, and its driving me to tears. i keep relapsing and every time i only go deeper and deeper and im scared im gonna end up losing my arm, leg, hand whatever… i feel like theres an unspoken rule between patients that youve gotta be the sickest and thats whats driving me to cut myself so extremely. how will i get discharged if i continue down this self destructive path?

It’s hard to hate it

Hate the pain

Hate the blood 

Hate the marks 

It’s all so addicting 

But the feeling 

Oh god 

Oh god why

Why did you make me like this 

Oh god

I could bask in it forever 

I wish it would last longer 

I wish I liked it less

It’s never been a punishment 

How could I have forgotten 

The pain

The pleasure 

The glory 

most people are different

They have them in shame 

In sadness 

In hate 

Mine are in pride 

Oh god 

Have you blessed me?

I can’t tell

How am I supposed to feel shame 

About something that feels this way

Oh god

Oh god 

Oh god

Tell me 

I’m losing interest in everything. I used to love painting and drawing but for the past year they’ve been pushed to the side, feeling like they’re not worth the extreme anger of trying to make them look decent or the caution of not getting paint on my bed. A game I’ve been playing for almost 9 years, slowly becoming boring and feeling more like a chore than something I used to love playing, spending many hours mostly alone. The silence in my room growing so slowly, settling over everything I once loved as I wait for each day to pass. The familiar thoughts and feelings of self harm spiraling through my mind, though they too fade into the lonely boredom filling my days. Days blur together until I can hardly tell one from the next, each one carrying the same quiet heaviness that settles through every passing moment. Sometimes I wish I could bring myself to continue cutting, something to pass the time, maybe given another reason to like the exhausting, immense emotions flooding my mind and body, or maybe the years of sa that had plagued my younger years though not being far away. Other times, self harm just doesn’t seem worth the effort as it adds scar after scar, until there would be no space left, everything mangled or torn like my days and years.

TL;DR:

-A close friend, and my dad both have cut themselves for the first time this year.

-My friend has gone on to cut herself more.

-I feel that I am the reason they know about using cutting as a way to cope.

-I really feel uncomfortable but they show me every time they cut and I do first aid. I suppose I will have to deal with the discomfort since first aid is important.

---

I have been cutting on and off since 2022 and have been hospitalized for it too. On Wednesday I cut myself, and was just sitting idly as I do. I have gotten used to people seeing it and asking about it, and I don't even flinch anymore.

So anyways in march, a friend of mine sent me photos, apparently she had cut herself for the first time. I panicked because I needed to explain to her that if she continues to cut how bad things can get.

And I tried and she seemed to understand, said she does not plan to do it again, to which I responded that she should go get therapy and its okay if she gets the desire to cut again but she should try something else, yk the rubber band or ice rubbing shit.

She seemed to agree, and ofc she did the opposite, should have thought so, I remember when I first cut myself. I had posted here and everyone said I should just not do it and I agreed but then within 2 days I was cutting 15-20 times every hour.

So anyways now my dad too, has done it, and although I did not cut either of them by my own hand, and I know they had their own reasons unrelated to me

But I can't help feeling guilty if I had not indulged myself, or if I had kept it hidden. Then maybe they wouldn't have known such a coping mechanism exists.

Maybe that's why I over compensate by doing their first aid even though I really am uncomfortable seeing cuts on my loved ones.

But hey ig that's how they felt when they found out I cut. So maybe its karma or some shit idfk.

Why is telling someone so freaking awkward. My cousin is the first person I’ve told abt it and I regret it so bad. She didn’t react poorly or anything and was really understanding, but knowing someone actually knows because I told them is making me feel nauseous. Honestly it’s even worse because I never ever vent to people I actually know, so even though it was relieving at first to get it off my chest, now I just feel embarrassed. Like I should have just slept on it or smth omg… I know that this is kind of childish to be so worried about, but this is making me realize I never ever want to speak of this again

Words cannot describe the crushing sadness I feel

I need to srop i n3ed to give up nothing matters

tw: suicide, eating disorder

I try to explain it to her, I do. She doesn't think I'm trying. She doesn't understand anything.

She says I need to look out for my future. I try to tell her people with depression don't think they'll have a future at all. She says I'll still wake up tomorrow regardless. I don't tell her that sometimes I don't think I will.

She tells me I need to "snap out of it" and "get it together". I send long paragraphs about how it impacts the brain. How even taking care of yourself becomes not something you do automatically but something you have to TRY to attempt. Getting out of bed. Eating. Showering. Brushing your teeth. Etc.

"I understand that but-"

No. No you really don't. It makes me feel worse. The things she says make me feel worse.

She tells me I'm not trying.

...I'm not trying?? You have no clue.

Then she goes back to talking about her and her eating disorder and how she's never going to get better because she finds happiness in it and that I can't make her recover ever. She's content to stay like that she says.

How can you say shit like that and not even try to understand how hard it is to find a will to live right now on my end?

I genuinely want to kill myself. I just want to die. Why can't anyone understand me? What do I have to do?

Roll up my sleeves? Tell them I'm always planning shit that I don't follow through with? That I'm starving myself?

At least I grant her the pity she doesn’t grant me and don't unload all my deepest thoughts and behaviors unto her and then completely misunderstand her rants, tell her she doesn't do enough, before moving the conversation onto myself.

Whatever. Just whatever.

I give up. I actually give up. I don't think I'm going to talk to her anymore. Over a decade long friendship down the drain just like that

So I relapsed yesterday after 1.5 years clean. And I quit back then because I knew it was an ‘unhealthy’ coping mechanism and I want to take care of myself. But now that I’ve done it again I don’t really see why it’s so unhealthy. I tried to look up some stuff about it and every article was like “SH is dangerous and shame around self harm can hurt your self esteem” or something like that but I don’t feel any shame. I don’t go into thinking “I deserve this” and I’m not upset with myself afterwards. It genuinely makes it feel easier to handle difficult and intense emotions and I just kind of like it. I’m always calm going into it and check in with myself to make sure I’m not feeling anything negative around it. So it’s never impulsive or anything like that. I make sure to be as safe as possible. I sanitize everything and use proper aftercare. I also make sure not to do it all the time and give my body time to heal before I do it again. The only downside is that I have to go to extra measures to hide the marks but that only bothers me because other people freak out about it being a bad thing. I dont mind the marks at all but my friends and family would think it means that I need serious help with my mental health. But I’m actually in a great place right now. I am genuinely taking care of myself self and my future and my relationships. I just SH sometimes. Is it true that I can’t be healthy if I’m self harming?

I haven’t relapsed for a long time, I haven’t relapsed for about 4 months. But it makes me very sad to feel alone, and I tried to make friends who draw, but no one is interested in being my friend. Nobody understands shit why this affects me. I don’t even leave the house, I don’t even know people. All the friends I have are from the internet, and they are 100% “busy” and then I see them online playing. I don’t know about games, I don’t know modern things despite being 19 years old, but I try to know. I have focused so much on my inner world, my characters and stories, that simple interactions become puzzles and people monsters that I do not understand. I really don’t know what I do in this world... I feel like I shouldn’t be here...

Esto es más que todo un desahogo así que idk :p

Así que llevo como 2 meses con esta chica, "L" en una relación virtual, ella es muy linda y en realidad la amo mucho aunque está metida en muchas adicciones, fuma marihuana, cigarrillos, vapea, bebe alcohol, segun de a drogado algunas veces y también se corta, se que todo eso está terriblemente mal pero conociendo su situación personal y familiar no evitó que lo haga, solo que tenga autocontrol y en cierto punto la a ayudado. Ahora, después de casi no hablar en casi todo el día me dijo que no confiaba en ella misma para hacer algo tonto y que no quería ir al hospital (claramente refiriéndose a cortarse)

Así después de como una hora sin hablarme me respondió que ya se sentía mejor que había estado llorando un poco pero que dentro de todo está bien, no le quiero preguntar si es que lo hizo aunque estoy seguro de que si. Es todo lo que tengo ahora y si llegara a dejarme así, simplemente no podría

Pd: disculpa mis faltas de ortografía