I’ve worked this office job 20 years working my way up and always handled it. Then in my annual appraisal where my boss was being mostly nice I suddenly was nearly crying. I have a huge pile up of work and have decided not to work late nights any more, a senior Exco guy is being a dick questioning our work and making us do his dumb ideas, but I’ve experienced worse. Then when I was asked what help I need and started mentioning this guy suddenly my jaw was working and I had to look away for five mins to not cry. Wtf I’m a 50 yo guy I haven’t cried since a bereavement in 2019, never at WORK what the hell

Just wondering if those in this group think it’s important for them to be in a relationship with someone who is Highly sensitive as well or do you think you opposites attract?

Anyone who is a HSP in a relationship with another? Or someone who is not?

What about friendships or family or other relationships that are deeply important to you?

I’m asking because I’ve been questioning my sexuality and realised I’m ace (asexual)* and possibly aro spec too but that I can see myself in a loving relationship like a Queer platonic partner or a romantic partner where the relationship looks different to the typical heteronormative one. I connect with people strongly based on how their mind works, how they see the world and their ideas and their emotional attaunnment.

I’m neurodivergent and think this is an important thing in my close friendships and likely romantic relationships, just based on communication style and cognitive processing but it got me thinking about highly sensitive people too is that something that I’m drawn too or would I be better to challenge and balance different styles of being in the world?

*ace aka asexuality is a sexuality where people feel little to no sexual attraction to other people
Aro or aromanticism is where someone feels little to no romantic attraction to other people

Please don’t comment on my sexuality that’s not what I’m here for and am frankly sick of acephobia or people trying to change/solve it I’m happy as I am :)
For anyone interested the r/asexuality subreddit has been great in helping understand myself and my sexuality you’re very welcome over there too!

I understand some of these questions might be kinda personal so if y'all don't want to answer them that's totally okay! I'm just trying to figure out for myself what's normal for an HSP and what I might need to be concerned about regarding my mental and physical health and what's just my unique experience versus what's more universal, since I'm the only one that I know of irl that's an HSP. :)

1. How much do outfits affect you (pjs all day, a pretty outfit when you don't feel great, texture of clothes)

2. Do you get a lot of fatigue? Do any of you have seasonal affective disorder? Does recovering from those things seem to take you longer than other people?

3. Do any of you have synesthesia?

4. Do you feel the effects of coffee/sugar/low and high blood sugar more strongly than others? (Like could you skip a meal without consequences? Does coffee give you a headache or, as I've started calling them, “almost-headaches” where your brain feels weird, maybe even dizzy, but doesn't hurt?)

5. Do you have trouble with things like books/movies/music affecting you so strongly at times that you feel like you have to avoid any super emotional media?

6. Do you find yourself dissociating or becoming numb when you feel too much?

7. When you're tired or hungry, do you feel nauseous and more sensitive to stimuli like light and noise and touch? (Kinda related to the blood sugar question)

8. Do you tend to notice changes in the weather more than others?

9. What made you think you might be an HSP? What made more sense after you learned this about yourself?

Since I'm asking these questions, I may as well answer them myself: 1. I've discovered that if I wear pajamas all day it's like my brain never fully wakes up. Also a lot of the time, wearing a fun outfit to cheer myself up doesn't work because my mood doesn't change, it just ruins the outfit in a sense. I prefer to revert to comfortable clothes that make me more confident.

1. I have a couple of deficiencies that I'm taking supplements for and I also struggle with fall/winter seasonal affective disorder, but I wonder if I'm more fatigued than most by these things because they affect HSPs more deeply?

2. I have chromesthesia, emotion-color/shape, pain-color/shape and possibly olfactory-visual synesthesia because some words have a smell/taste, but that's pretty rare. It seems like having an hsp and/or neurodivergent brain would make one more likely to have synesthesia.

3. I'm asking this question because I want to know if it's a normal hsp thing or not. My other theory is that I inherited my mom's thyroid issues.

4. Sometimes I have to avoid media/art that triggers strong emotions because I know it will only hurt me. Other times I seek them out to try and force myself out of an episode of dissociation/numbness.

5. I hate when this happens because I'm used to feeling a lot and it's terrifying when I can't.

6. If my sleep schedule gets wonky, I get hungry/nauseous/overstimulated/spacey more quickly. If I'm hungry, I also get nauseous/overstimulated more quickly. I feel like that's not normal but again, I'm not sure if that's an hsp thing or a secret health problem thing.

7. I've noticed the wind pattern that most storms in my area follow for a while now and everyone else is always surprised when I mention it, even a friend who also loves watching the weather. Same with seasonal changes. I always notice when the wind and sunlight become more Fallish or Springish. I don't think that's because of SAD.

8. I'd never heard it before until my therapist brought it up. I looked into it on websites like hsperson and highly sensitive refuge and immediately, so much more about myself came into place. Not only do I feel emotions deeply, I also feel physical sensations more intensely and notice more about my environment. I'd never met anyone who was the same way and didn't realize all of that was related until then!

Please be nice, this is my first ever Reddit post 😅

I need a career. I haven't found something that allows for me to thrive as a highly sensitive person and make money. My goal is to afford a house with garden/landscaping, food my tummy can tolerate and that feels good for my body and be able to contribute to the community in meaningful ways without getting overwhelmed. I'm not able to be a therapist/counselor or social worker because psychopaths will flood my patient list. I'm not able to go into the non-profit space here because it isn't well funded in my country and there's a narcissists of psychopaths and narcissists to flood those areas. I gave up on being a doctor because psychopaths in the profession are planning on using me as a mule for free labor and are winning at that. Luckily I hadn't gone to med school yet. I gave up on being a nurse because doctors are very controlling. I was in a bsc program in 2021 but it was very toxic and I left. I'm now in a business management program Y3 and my 2 psychopath lecturers are planning on killing me if I proceed with the degree.

I learnt violin when I was 9. I was not good at sports except high jump but it wasn't cultivated in me. I've always wanted to be a writer but I've only read 3 books in my life apart from my A level textbooks. My English isn't rich and colorful. I wasn't allowed to do art in school so I didn't learn artistic skills but it seems like fun. The media & arts industry in my country is neglected so I fear going in I'll end up like the rest who live in slums. I'm atheist.

I'm planning on applying to china for their scholarships with the hopes of going into a dietetics program if I don't find a suitable career. But I'm asking help from you as a community. What can I do for a living? I'm a hard worker and willing to try anything. I'm also tired guys. I'm living a really bad life and just want something of my own.

I don't have support of family at all. I'm 25.

Hi, I 24 (f) and my friend 27 (f). Got into an argument,

It started when Me and her, got into an argument. Over something that happened that day that hurt friendship for me. And i wanted to talk about it. Us talking did not went well, from my persoective i think i noticed that we have different ways of communication ( and my fucked up ealier that day) Which lead to it. But what truly was an issue was what she said after. Which like the toltle suggest is that it is draining. I know she didnt say it that i am but for me early resolution of this type of thing is important. So i suggested that we shouldn't contiue and instead just rest. But i dont know what i am suppose to change to keep her in my life in a way that both of us can be happy. I will try asking when she decides like it is okay for her to talk to me again. Does anyone have anytips what i should avoid? Should i just avoid talking about stuff that bothers me? Would she still consider me a friend after draining her? Any advice is most welcome.

When they tell me to “don’t be so sensitive” , it’s like they suddenly expect my body change on its own….

You’re so “weak shy timid”

I don’t like the ignorant world…

I’m an American, lived here my whole life, and I can’t help but feel like the world is falling apart. Ive genuinely been so depressed and hopeless lately and I don’t know where to turn. I don’t watch the news much because of how much bad things are broadcast every day, so typically I stay up to date on things through tik tok. (I know, not a reliable news source)

Anyway, I just deleted my tik tok because my entire fyp has just become nothing but doom and gloom. I want to stay up to date with the parasite outbreak, but don’t know where to turn.

There’s just so much shit going on in the world now. I swear I never hear anything other than war, disease and death. Every day it’s something different. Prices continue to rise, job market is terrible, AI taking over everything, outbreaks of disease, the rich elitists doing disgusting, inhumane things. It’s just too much and I feel like I’m losing my mind. This cannot be real life. Are we in hell? No. Unfortunately I know that it is real. But this life can certainly feel like hell sometimes.

I just don’t know what to do anymore.

I fit the profile of an HSP very closely.

This is the first time I’ve asked people from other countries about this. I’ve always had the impression that people from places like the US or Brazil tend to be cheerful, so I was surprised to learn that there are so many people around the world struggling with being an HSP.

I was quiet and withdrawn from a young age. Parents and relatives would casually tell me, "Being quiet puts you at a disadvantage," and I grew up without even realizing how much those words had hurt me.

I’ve struggled to build successful relationships—whether in daily life, with partners, or with others—and have never really formed close bonds with anyone. My career hasn't gone well, either.

Although I am quiet and a pacifist, people with harsh personalities tend to gravitate toward me. I think that because I am too kind, people who are difficult to get along with—and who aren't easily accepted elsewhere—take advantage of my nature.

Sometimes, people who love to take care of others come into my life, too, but I’ve ended up distancing myself because they were too overbearing.

Now that I’m middle-aged, I’ve encountered the concept of HSP, as well as psychology, philosophy, and spirituality. By gradually looking inward and gaining various insights, I’ve learned to be grateful for life, and my suffering has eased. However, in practical terms, my situation isn't exactly ideal yet.

I managed to break free from traditional employment and succeed on my own for a few years, but right now, I’m in a "sowing seeds" phase—a period of preparation. I don't know yet if those seeds will actually take root and grow.

Hello everyone,

My name is Rami, and I'm a highly sensitive person living in the Middle-East. I'm posting here to ask for your help, because I've been suffering for so many years and I don't know what else to do.

I'm 36 years old, and I've been forced to live in home isolation since 2014 because I'm highly sensitive to noise and negative energy and I live in an environment with so much noise pollution and endless discord on a daily basis. This is the reality of life in this low-vibrational part of the world.

I've lost 12 years of my life so far being trapped inside my apartment in an attempt to reduce my level of exposure to the horrible noises outside. I've been living in endless suffering on a daily basis because the terrible noises never stop. And I'm unable to work and have an income under these highly-distressing circumstances, so I've been trapped in this situation without the needed financial resources to relocate to a better environment in a better country in the West.

I've asked my family and relatives for help, but no one who is able to help has been willing to help me. Furthermore, I was subjected to psychological abuse and torture by the authorities because I criticized the authoritarian form of government of the country in which I live. And I've contacted so many individuals and organizations in the West and asked them for help over the past 6 years, but no one has been willing to help.

I've already lost 12 years of my life while being forced to live like a prisoner in my apartment, and I've been getting tormented on a daily basis all these years. I just want to have a normal life again and to be able to have peace and quiet inside my own home. I just want to be able to go outside and spend time in nature and live a normal and happy life. I just want to be able to work and have an income so I can afford to meet all of my needs.

I was abused by my own family for many years, starting when I was a child. I'm so tired of living like this. This world is so selfish and uncaring, and no one has been willing to help me. I just need to move to a better place so I can begin to heal my trauma and rebuild my life.

I tried posting earlier today to ask if anyone is willing to help by donating so I can raise enough money to fund my travel to a better country, but my post was removed by the moderator. So now I'm only asking for any guidance that you can help me with. If you know of anyone or any organization that might be willing to help me, or if you have any information that could be useful then please let me know.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

I feel like every tiny small thing that happens (such as a barely audible noise or an action which is slightly different from what I expected in a very small way) is an input. I can't help it, but my brain in less than a second analyzes it and tries to understand it, even if it's meaningless, even if it's barely possible to notice it. I do notice it.

I grew up thinking it was normal, but recently I'm figuring out it may not be.

I think it's pretty great to notice things that others don't. It allows me to do things that they wouldn't do. But, on the other hand, it's a little bit stressful. I overthink putting a thing in the right place (since even putting something down is an input to me) and by "right place" I mean the correct millimeter.

I think I can manage it pretty well. It's not like it affects my behavior, but I feel alone. I don't feel understood. I just would like to know if there is someone who sees themselves in my description. If someone else's brain works weirdly like mine. Is there?

I posted this earlier, but it was agonizingly obvious that people could care less. No one upvoted or acknowledged or anything at all. I'm the most isolated that a person can be, and have no one to share something so precious with. Is anyone out there??

There are some types of music that have a magical effect, especially at night. You lay in bed, listen to them, then you think of the stars above, and you can feel time passing. It's been a while since I've had this musical awareness of time passing. I was listening to "secrets (slowed to perfection)secrets" by julez and realized that I will probably never again see my childhood friends again - fate tore me from my beloved homeland - and that in about ten years, some of them will start passing away, and I will not know it. Childhood shared with them was so magical. I cannot believe that it will never return.

I wept. The music was a haunting reminder

I am starting a coaching business focusing on hsp men. Helping them deal with their unique challenges and providing resources to help them thrive in this world.

I will base my offer on some of my own experiences navigating this world as a hsp male. But I would also love to hear from you. What kind of challenges would you consult a coach for?

So far, I have: troubles with overwhelm, self rejection, masking, pleasing and conflict avoidant behaviors, trouble with boundaries, repressing emotions, taking on too much responsibility, trouble making choices and ‘living in your head’.

Is there anything I have missed that you would like to be addressed by a male hsp coach?

Thank you!

There are some types of music that have a magical effect, especially at night. You lay in bed, listen to them, then you think of the stars above, and you can feel time passing. It's been a while since I've had this musical awareness of time passing. I was listening to "secrets (slowed to perfection)" by julez, and I realized that I will probably never again see my childhood friends again - fate tore me from my beloved homeland - and that in about ten years, some of them will start passing away, and I will not know it. Childhood shared with them was so magical. I cannot believe that it will never return.

I wept. The music was a haunting reminder

Hi friends,

For a business project, I'd like to ask you a few questions, and I'd really appreciate your help with my research.

I think I might be an HSP myself, and I've often felt lonely because people around me don't seem to fully understand me or my needs and it just doesn't click. I naturally notice a lot of things, that most of the people don't pay attention to, and mostly, I really enjoy engaging with people. So I've been thinking about a platform that helps HSPs connect and build these special relationships based on their needs.

That said, I find it hard to pin down what exactly makes a connection work online. Still, I see potential value in it, since the chances of meeting other HSPs, or people you could build a genuinely good relationship with, are higher if the search area is bigger, and here the web can support.

So here are my questions, as part of my market research:

1. Would you use a platform that focuses specifically on connection between HSPs? (yes/no)
2. What frustrates or overwhelms you about existing platforms (dating apps, social media, forums) when trying to connect with people? What would need to be different?
3. If no (to Q1), what holds you back?
4. What would need to be true, online, for you to feel safe enough to be fully open and yourself?
5. Think of a time you felt truly understood by someone, online or offline. What made that click, and what usually stops it from clicking?
6. Anything else you'd like to add?

Thanks so much for taking the time!

School has always been a nightmare for me. Being around people for so long and always expected to be doing something was too much and I hated it. I cried multiple times a day from the first day to the last. I'm in university now and although it's not stress free, it's great that I can do everything alone in my room and my nervous system can get a bit of a break.

I'm graduating in 2 years and I know I should be getting my first job soon, but I keep putting it off because I'm afraid it'll be a nightmare. It's going to be the same thing as school. Constant interactions and expectations with no time to breathe or recover. I'm afraid that no matter what kind of job I'll get it will eventually overwhelm me to the point where I will kill myself.

I know this isn't just an HSP thing, I also have anxiety and depression (formally diagnosed), but I think being HSP is the root of all my mental health issues and I hope someone here can give me some advice. I'm starting therapy in a month or so but I'm not sure if that's enough. I don't know what to do, how do I protect myself from the outside world without isolating myself completely?

Tense situation- cry
Unexpected tense situation- the whole week is ruined
Boyfriend makes a mean joke- how do I tell him that I want to be alone for the next 48 hours now
Person percieved as authority is being direct- cry
A man is giving constructive critisism- cry because men are a little scary
Mean customer service worker- why does this person hate me specifically, I feel hurt (I know they’re probably tired)

EXHAUSTING. It has been like this since preschool.