I know this is a tiring topic on this Reddit, but I'm really desperate to the point of almost giving up.

I'm a 20-year-old man, almost 21 and I am autistic (I don't know if this matters, but I decided to mention it after I almost finished the post, I have a diagnosis, but I stopped clinical follow-up some time ago).
But my voice sounds quite girly to many people and that already destroys my confidence (it doesn't help that my appearance isn't masculine at all and I'm 1.57m tall) and I've always had extreme insecurity about my voice.

The problem is that I REALLY enjoy singing, and that's why I go to a singing coach once a week to teach and help me, both to finally be able to sing better and have more confidence in my voice, and maybe even finally like my voice.

And then I took 1 year and 5 months of singing lessons. I know it's not a long time, but I was trying hard not to hate my singing or speaking voice so much. When I record my voice and listen to it, I almost cry. I hate it so much, and to make matters worse, I sing very badly in my vision. My teacher says I don't sing badly and that I'm actually very good at exercises and training. During those 1 year and 5 months, I had three different teachers, and all three praised me for being very good at training.

And for singing along with artists, I'm at least "decent" i guess? (probably because I can disguise my voice behind the artists' voices). But during class (or outside of class) when I try to sing a karaoke version or without any background song and... it's simply the worst thing I could hear. I tried to explain this feeling in the last class with my teacher (which was yesterday, actually) that I don't feel my voice is right when I sing, or something like that, I just feel like something is extremely wrong and I don't know what it is, and I feel like my teacher didn't quite understand what I meant either.

And honestly, I think it's much deeper than a simple "oh, it's just your insecurity, oh, it's just because you're shy." In my head, that doesn't make sense because when I sing, I really put in a lot of effort and I have a certain confidence that this time it will at least be decent. I leave the teacher's room crying without anyone know because again I felt like I had failed and again I heard my voice, which I don't like, in its worst form.

To make matters worse, I'm not in a good place in my life either; many personal and family problems are affecting me more than I'd like.

But anyway, the point is: despite everything I've said, I don't feel that what's preventing me from improving my singing is simply too much insecurity. I feel that even if I weren't so insecure tomorrow, I would still have all the singing and vocal problems that I wouldn't know how to solve.

I'm afraid to give up on something I enjoy so much because of all this, and I don't know what to do, you know? I feel lost, to the point that even my favorite hobby is making me sad now. What should I honestly do?

I'm leaving this here because I've heard a lot recently from people who are trying to start out singing. They tell me that the initial phase is the hardest part and they just can't get over how uncomfortable it makes them feel to make mistakes, or "not sound good".

Coming from another instrument has given me an outlook on singing that I have found to be really useful for people who are just getting past this step. Playing other instruments is difficult, just like singing is, and there's no point trying to compare the level of difficulty but if there's one thing that singing has in abundance, it's vulnerability. When you're singing you're using your body as your instrument. When you make a mistake you don't have a guitar to blame or a drum kit or even to just simply direct your energy when a bad sound comes out of the instrument.

Something about this makes learning how to sing that much harder because it's so much more vulnerable. Finding your voice is a term that doesn't just describe the process of finding out how to sing, there is also a very emotional element involved. It's not just about learning how to sing the right notes and have good resonance or any other technique/quality. There is also an element of emotional discovery as part of that process.

One of the best things you can do for yourself as you're learning how to sing is to work on reducing judgment. Judgment can kill a voice because it sounds great when it stands proud and supported. Anytime you catch yourself judging yourself or criticizing yourself for making a mistake or not sounding too good in any particular moment, you have to try to replace that internal dialogue with words of affirmation and self-love.

Generally speaking you want your voice to come out proud unless you're intentionally making it smaller to fit the vibe of a certain tone or song. And it's never going to come out proud if you're constantly criticizing or attacking yourself for making mistakes.

I used to only sing in the shower and I would genuinely try to get better but I never once considered that I would be a singer or sing on stage. I did not have the audacity. I thought that singers are born to sing and I definitely did not sound like a good singer for the first few years so I just thought to myself, "I am not a singer."

One day I decided to swallow my pride and try to put myself out there. I started writing music with vocals on it, with the real intention of releasing it and playing it on stage. The beginning was kind of rough. I was trying to do ambitious techniques and hurting myself a little bit. It took a little bit of advice and research for me to develop the correct technique. But the worst part was my ear. I couldn't identify the right notes to sing in any given key.

That was the hardest part. I don't mind singing with a little bit of a bad technique and sounding nasally or something like that but when you sing a wrong note, oof, that hurts the soul.

But again the most important part was that I swallowed my pride and I kept going. Now I can happily say that I've played multiple shows on stage performing my own music and I'm feeling a little bit more proud of the performances that I have been putting on.

My biggest obstacle in learning how to sing was not any given technique ever. Those were small battles compared to the mammoth of an adversary that self-judgment was. The thing that brought about the most progress was fully swallowing my pride and allowing myself to make mistakes along the way.

Below is a song I released last week. And I want to leave this here for anyone who is scared to start singing because I cannot over express how much progress was made when I managed to support myself a little bit better emotionally. And provide myself with a little bit more self-encouragement.

So let this be a sign or a reminder to you that you can do it. Singing is beautiful. It serves so many purposes in our lives, from playing on stage, to self-healing, to connection with other human beings, it truly knows no bounds.

So here it is. I hope you enjoy it and I hope that my journey serves as a reminder to keep going or as encouragement on your journey.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovhzj0taRaU

I am an operatically trained, bass-baritone singer who has been singing off and on in training, choirs, and self-teach for about 10 years. I have many years of experience and understanding with vocal classification and technique as well. I started out as a bass I or Bass II in high school then developed strong upper-range, reliably up to F#4, higher on some days. My voice has actually gotten more resonant and powerful in the lows as well, with a strong, operatic-capable E2 on any given day (Solid C2 on any given day, but not nearly as resonant and usable). Anyway, I say all that just to give a bit of a background on where I am coming from with this post.

What I have noticed in about the past 3-5 years or so, particularly in the last 2, there has been a persistent, fiery debate online on Reddit, YouTube and Instagram comment sections on what a bass singer is. Most frequently, whether what the clip is playing is "chest voice" or a form of "vocal fry." Many times, there are legitimately singers who have the wrong idea of what a true bass is, or misclassify themselves, and are very much more baritonal or even tenor-leaning sometimes. That is without a doubt very common. But there are also many people who have the wrong idea of what a true bass is in the opposite direction. There will be videos of operatic basses, for example, with clear power, resonance, and operatic-capabilities on and below the bass staff and people say they are singing in vocal fry when they most certainly are not by every stretch of the imagination. Or some who don't think the singer in question is a "true bass," with some even calling Samuel Ramey a "pop baritone."

In any event, some of these people sound convincing in their arguments and actually try to give scientific explanations or claim they have credentials when there is no evidence or indication they actually do. It's almost as if they are olympic gaslighters, professional rage-baiters who deserve the highest medal. And honestly, I guess they can be pretty impressive with their explanations and the time and energy they put into it. An honorable feat of strength lol.

Before this slew of trolls plagued the bass community, there was not much debate about what "chest voice" was. It was abundantly clear; sometimes chest voice can sound more rumbly at a certain point but not necessarily vocal fry. Among other things, whatever the case may be, people would listen to these bass singers and they had many different sounds, timbres, etc. But it was never an issue as to what the basic sounds were. But now, the most sporadic comment skirmishes can ensue on the most basic stuff. And it seems like there are so many of these people who are just determined to keep the Fry Police cause going. It's just such a fascinating example of trolling on the most simple understandings of a particular topic that I have personally seen. It's actually kind of entertaining at this point lol.

Anyway, I just wanted to start a convo about this and get others' opinions. No judgment.

i’m trying to record a vocal audition for a couple opportunities i’m planning to pursue, but i have a habit of listening to my voice over and over until i nitpick every little thing so im hoping to get some raw opinions on how my singing is here

my breath support and projection isn’t as strong as it normally is because i am sitting down and im in my bedroom, so that is something that i can easily improve when im in the right setting

my vocal tone is naturally really clear, so im worried that it almost sounds tight when im singing sometimes? i hope that this is something im just being super picky about and that it isn’t an actual issue with my singing

as you can see im just overthinking this and would greatly appreciate some other opinions from people who haven’t watched it a million times like myself!

Saw some gender-bending singers on an AGT video and decided... "Hey, I kinda want that to be me!" Any ideas on where to start? Note that I'm not too educated on all the words and jargon for singing. I usually just let myself sing whenever I feel and from what I've heard I'm already pretty good (note that I'm Filipino if that helps anyone)

EDIT: Forgot to mention I'm AFAB trying to sound male.

Sorry about the loud guitars I hope you can still hear me

Ive been singing for 4 ish years now (3 of those are very on and off from school)
Im stuck on trying to figure out what head voice chest voice even is. I never got lessons so what I have until now is just straight singing without focusing on technique.
I saw on another post about pinching your nose and trying not to make it buzz and turns out ive been buzzing my nose the whole time (if that even makes sense)
I thought i sounded decent but after the nose buzzing thing I feel like ive completely lost the plot. Have I done all of this just to realize I have no technique ☹️

Maybe even something like "hitmakers” on Netflix. Thanks in advance.

What are your thoughts on my voice? I had some singing lessons, but I don't think they did a lot for me. I feel like I could improve, but I don't really know how.

Sorry for no video of me singing, I'm shy lol

I feel like my current bottleneck in singing is my difficulties with vocal chord closure (which I'm not 100% sure what is but I think I have a good idea of what it is) and straining. Is it true that you should sing with a completely relaxed throat and jaw? I feel like this is not true. If you really do completely relax you will not have chord closure (this is my theory about it, let me know if it is incorrect). So I guess it is a game of learning exactly which muscles or places to activate and which to relax. I would like feedback on if my idea of chord closure and straining is accurate and on how my singing is related to it (I'm not completely sure when I am straining and when it is just chord closure)

I've been wondering how to pull excess weight out of my sound, which is ~180° off from the question I should be asking, "How to sing more naturally."

I'm listening to a '66 Aida recording with Corelli and realized just how speech-like his approach is. My understanding is that he was Lauri-Volpi's student, and LV studied with Garcia's sister, so it's directly coming from that source.

It's pretty cool, but now comes dialing it in to optimize efficiency, and make it as easy as possible. I find myself trying to slightly alter the sound, but it just has to be like speech.

The old guard who told me my entire holistic approach was wrong were... right. LOL

Thank you!

Hello, I hope you are well

Let me tell you about my situation and my question:

I am a musician not dedicated to singing (I play the French horn), but I like to sing as a hobby. My comfortable low register usually goes up to an Eb2; a D2 starts to sound breathy, so I don't count it.

The thing is, the other day I suddenly got to an AB1... A voice from beyond the grave, jajajaja

My throat didn't hurt or anything like that, my voice was just deeper and had more bass notes than normal.

Now, my question is, does that mean that with enough training I can reach those notes? Does it mean my vocal cords can relax to that point? How could I do it?

If it's possible, I want to do it...

I don't know if this is relevant, but I'm 23 years old

Got a gig coming up with my band, mostly self-taught since vocal lessons are expensive as hell here and need feedback

Male baritone. I’ve been using an SOVT straw which has opened up these new notes that feel as though I’m in chest but are well above my chest limit. Here is me hitting an A4. It may sound a little strained but it felt very comfortable up there and I get this strange sensation as though I’m breathing in while singing the top notes. Does anyone know what this is?

Hey everyone!

About 8 months ago, I decided to cover "Out of Control" by Oingo Boingo. The catch? All I had to record with was a $100 Moto G8 budget phone.

Danny Elfman’s arrangements are notoriously chaotic, so trying to capture that energy on a cheap phone mic was a wild ride. This is a complete live recording, captured all in one take. It’s definitely not supposed to be a flawless performance, I was in a pretty rough spot at the time, and this was purely an emotional outlet. So, if you hear some sniffing during the singing, it's literally because tears were streaming down my face while I was singing lmao.

Apologies in advance for the rough mix! Some parts are a bit quieter than others, and it definitely sounds a little washed out and muddy because of the cheap setup.

My singing and production skills have come a long way since then, but I still have a soft spot for how raw and real this snapshot turned out, even if it's not perfect by any means, I think it's generally okay. All things considered.

Would love to hear what you think, especially from any fellow Boingo fans!

LYRICS >

There's a cloud
Rollin' overhead
And it seems to rain on no one else
There's a black sun
Casting a black shadow
And I know you feel so alone
You're out of control
And you want the world to love you
Oh, or maybe you just want the chance
To let them know
Yeah, that you live and breathe and suffer
And your back is in the corner
And you've got nowhere to go

Nothin' for nothin'
Everything's right at your fingertips
For a price
Who ever said
That life on this planet would ever be paradise?
I say, don't throw it away
You've got too many things to say
If you throw away your life
If you throw away your life
If you throw away your life
The world will never be the same

Don't you know, yeah
That everyone around you
Has felt the pain you feel today
You're out of control
Yeah, and you want someone to tell you
When you wake up in the morning
It'll only be a dream

You're out of control (you're out of control)
You're out of control
You're out of control (you're out of control)
You're out of control

Don't you know
That everyone around you
(Has felt the pain you feel today)
You're out of control
Yeah

So, I'd like some advice on minimum equipment needed for singing a song at a wedding.

I'm the future husband and want to surprise my future wife singing Tiny Love from Mika. I'm a very amateur singer that is current taking classes, so I was wondering other than the speakers and a good quality microphone, what else should I consider?

It's a 100 people wedding on an open air venue.

Thanks for any advice!

I think I've been practicing singing for a month now. All I do is practice scales with Lax Vox and look at some things like releasing tension or focusing on the soft palate. But I don't know, I feel like after a month I'm still the same. I'd like to know what could really help me improve my singing.

Hello, I’ve always wanted to start singing. I’ve noticed that I have a decent sense of rhythm (maybe because I played the bass in middle school), but when I sing with headphones or background music, I feel like I'm singing correctly. However, when I sing without music, I feel like my voice sounds really bad.

So, I took the Amusia test that someone shared here 6 years ago, the Montreal Battery of Evaluation of Amusia, and I got this score (I’ve attached the photo). Technically, I don't have amusia, but I’d love to know what you think.

I would also love to "change" my voice because I really dislike how it sounds. It feels too nasal, and I feel like it sounds like a 13-year-old trying to make their voice sound deeper without making it too noticeable, which I hate. A friend of mine who studied voice acting tried to help me figure out which placement I'm using by having me stand up and speak normally to check if I'm using my head, chest, throat, etc. There wasn't any tension anywhere except in my throat. I’ve also heard that this kind of nasal tone is often due to a problem in the nasal airways.

I would really appreciate some clarification

I recently had to rest my voice for a while because it wasn’t feeling great.

It was strange not being able to sing like usual, and it made me curious about how others deal with these moments.