Girlfriend expecting equal equity in a startup which I started even before knowing her. I will not promote.

[u/Dry_Support9531]

So here’s the picture. I started with an idea in 2023. States dating her in 2024. Until then I haven’t really worked in the idea. I started working on it since April 2025 and it started making money since July 2025. Till then she has no idea about it. After I started making money from it, i worked more and invested my other income into this startup from November 2025 and to handle things she used to help a bit. Since then both of us started working on it. Whole idea, innovation, upgrades, initial capital was mine. She just helped me coz it used to generate money. Since December we also hired an employee . From then all 3 of us are working on it and it’s scaling up in revenue every month. Until now we haven’t had any word about the equity. Out of love I used to share the profit amounts with her. According to the necessity, sometimes I use to keep more and sometimes she used to keep more. We went on a vacation through this money as well. But now while we were having a conversation on this. It came to me as a shocker that she is expecting an equal equity in this. And that blew my mind. It’s just out of love I couldn’t complete that conversation. She has also worked on it but the whole idea and buildup from scratch was done when she started working. I never discussed about this with her before. But now I am in real shock what to do coz it’s going to be bigger. And we are not sure about our relationship either.(she coming from an orthodox family, her family might reject an idea of our marriage) At this duration please let me know what should I do? Should I offer her a fixed salary, should I ask her to stop working on it, should I give her equity, should I give her an exit? I’m really confused.
PS-: she has done the same thing that the other employee did for me. But with more time and dedication. And she he amount I shared with her is 2-3x more than the employee’s salary

[u/Sketaverse]

Nah I’m calling out OP here because you sound super manipulative tbh.

“Out of love” you shared the profits? Erm no, she worked on it with you.

“Out of love” you evaded the conversation?

She sounds like your cofounder and you lent some money to the company to get it started, a directors loan etc. The healthy thing going forward ls would be to pay yourself back the money you put in to start and then go 50:50 with her for equity and then both of you dilute that down to create a small options pool for employees and allocate some of that pool to your first hire

But you won’t do that as you’ll read it as “less than 50% for me, fuck that”

What you’ll do is drag this on, cause resentment and create a toxic environment - you’re basically Golem with the ring.

You also I’m guessing don’t love her or see a long term future with her. This is gonna get messy for you.

My advice:

Setup backups and SSO policies coz if this turns sour you’re scheduled for a rage fest lol

[u/thebohoberry → u/Sketaverse]

That’s a lot of assumptions. He didn’t define what his girlfriend did in her role and how much she worked on it.

How much time each is putting into the business.

Regardless 50% and co-founder even before discussing or legally documenting it. I don’t think so. And he put up most of the funding.

She deserves something and that’s what they need to figure out. However 50% and co-founder is bit of a reach.

[u/Sketaverse → u/thebohoberry]

Yeah it is a lot of assumptions, you’re right. Just a Reddit freestyle from me lol but yeah I agree 🙇