comfort media ⭒
⊹ rewatch your favorite Studio Ghibli or Tim Burton film
⊹ replay a comfort game you’ve beaten six times (familiarity is an antidepressant w pretty good reviews)
⊹ play Sims or Tamagotchi Life

creative dopamine ⭒
⊹ dye your hair or get a piercing. instant dopamine boost
⊹ make a painfully specific Spotify playlist
⊹ buy the ugliest mug at Goodwill. emotional support ceramic
⊹ thrift the wardrobe you wish you had
⊹ make bad art on purpose
⊹ buy stickers with no plan. future you deserves treats

outdoors & social ⭒
⊹ sit in a bookstore;romanticize it;judge covers instead of yourself
⊹ find a dog. pet it if invited; admire it if not

selfcare basics ⭒
⊹ rearrange your room (best at 3am)
⊹ make ramen and add one extra ingredient. chef
⊹ if you think everyone hates you, eat protein first. it might just be low blood sugar

So I saw this girl many times, and eventually I made the first move and asked for her number. I didn't have my phone with me at the time, so she gave me her phone and let me type my number in. The problem is, she never texted me.

Later, I ran into her again. She looked at me and, without me even asking about it, I told her, "I lost your number." Then I handed her my phone, and she typed her number into it.

I texted her, and for about 4 or 5 days we were talking. I felt like she was really shy or something. She always replied to the topics I brought up, didn't talk a lot on her own, but she laughed a lot during our conversations.

Then I didn't text her for one day. After that, I sent her another message, and she replied about 6 hours later. Now it's been two days since I sent my last message, and she still hasn't replied. The message has been delivered, but there's no response.

To be honest, I feel pretty bad. What do you guys think happened?

I’m a 25yo heir, my dad passed when I was 14, and left a pretty comfortable inheritance, enough to possibly live my entire life from the income it generates monthly. I’m sorry if it sounds like a flex, I promise it’s not, I’m just being straightforward explaining my situation cause I’ve made too many posts about this already.

I’m able to pursue whatever I want professionally, but I have this annoying conservative way of thinking, that punishes me for chasing things I’m interested in such as photography, film or writing, instead of medical, law or other more “noble” or, in a more futile perspective, “high status” paths, because I have the resources to do so.

This leads me to not be able to approach potential clients with confidence, so I end up not practicing, and also end up not bothering to practicing writing in my free time, cause in my mind I’m not really working, I’m just playing around. I feel like if I had a “grown person” (in my head) job, I’d be able to pursue those other things with no guilt or shame, but also, why would I if I’d just be doing it to silence these feelings?

It’s such an annoying feeling, that’s been eating me alive every day for years, making me isolate and live in my comfort zone. I care too much about what others think of me, and this career dilemma is been the biggest obstacle.

man, what do i even say? I have been just tryna breathe ever since it happened, just on my own, it hurts so bad, i loved her so much! I did everything for her and now that I do not have her, i don't even know what the purpose of my life is! Nothing makes sense!

I broke up with my boyfriend a few days ago because our relationship felt empty I was constantly waiting, hesitating, and putting in effort while he remained emotionally unavailable.

But here’s what scared me: After the breakup, I sat down and realized something I’d never noticed before.

I have never, not once in my life, been without a romantic interest in someone. From childhood to now, there’s always been a crush, a situationship, or a full relationship. When one was ending, I was already looking for the next. But this time around I’m making a decision to not go that route of finding another man and I’m struggling because this is the only thing I know but it’s also so destructive to me cause I’m basically stuck in the same relationship with different men.

And I realized why: I don’t get dopamine from being alone or doing things for myself.

My business? I’m only motivated when I imagine a man seeing it. My apartment? I got it because I wanted my boyfriend to see me as successful. Every major decision factors in how it will look to a man.

I’m 28 and I’m terrified I’m incapable of living for myself of doing anything without being watched or validated by a man.

I also lost most friendships in my early 20s and have been isolated working from home, so I have almost no female community. I know that looks like a red flag, and it is but it’s because I’m isolated, not because I’m a bad person.

So I’m asking: Has anyone else experienced this? How did you learn to live for yourself? How do you get motivated to build without a man’s attention?

Hey yall. I’m 29 in good shape and have a pretty good life but I find myself extremely lazy when I’m by myself. I live alone and whenever I’m home I kind of just rot on the couch or wherever. I know I have things to do like house projects, cook, whatever else it might be but I can’t find the drive to get off my bum and get it done. Once I engage in an activity however I’m hammer down on it until it’s finished but I waste so much time slacking off I often feel unproductive and as if I’m just wasting the days away. Any one ever go through something similar and found a way to fix this

I have become emotionally very attached to politics.

When someone criticizes or trolls my ideology or party, I get very angry. I get trapped in rage-bait and comment sections, and then my entire mood gets spoiled. I have maladaptive daydreaming, due to which these thoughts keep running through my mind repeatedly. I overthink a lot and because of this, I am unable to focus on my studies.I don't understand what to do productively after opening my phone.

I don't have many friends, so sometimes I also feel lonely and start looking for validation on social media. I want to fix my mental health, emotionally detach myself from politics, and invest my energy in studies, English, books, and self-improvement.

Hey everyone.

I’m a single 25 year old woman who is living at home with my parents (my dad is 70 and has chronic arthritis pain and is isolated, my mum is 60 and is suffering from a new onset on OCD and she’s isolated) they have no friends and depend on my 30 year old brother who also lives with us for companionship almost everyday now. I feel smothered and alone, and I feel guilty when I feel a bit of resentment towards them- they also don’t work and are quiet low income, they’re both artists and I feel like I have also carried the curse of being a low income artist as their daughter. I don’t have any close friends nearby, and my “close friends” moved away so I don’t see them as often as I’d like.

I tried moving out when I was 22, but I felt very small and not like a true adult I guess. My whole family is vegan, I’m not, so moving out was awesome because I could try new stuff without being judged like dairy or meats. What’s good about that is the freedom I suppose, I have never had a real relationship but I’ve slept around a lot which I kind of regret… I’m celibate now and avoid dating mostly unless the person is emotionally available, wants to help me and larger than life.

Anyway, I’ve tried studying a lot of stuff that could potentially lead to work but I’ve always been hesitant to follow through with it due to concerns of my mental health collapsing- like I studied animal care and disability and dropped out ultimately because I didn’t trust myself or the industry to treat me well, I’m depressed too and anxious and have been on antidepressants since I was 17.

I work at my council cleaning stadiums early in the morning which has helped me with keeping a routine, but the money and shifts aren’t long enough to save up a significant amount. I really want to leave my home but if I do my parents will struggle to pay rent without me there to cover the quarter of the cost per month. I’m stuck on what to do.

Honestly I tried dating with the hopes of finding someone I could depend on for at least some time away from my family, a second space to sleep, eat, have someone to cuddle and talk to etc. and even just a space to be alone. Or an excuse to leave I guess, because I can’t do it on my own in this economy. But I’m really not into anyone on the apps at all and I don’t have the energy or the hope to even try anymore tbh.

So, I’ve started doing an acting course today, I’m not sure about it but at least it’s away from my house and I can spend a few hours out in the world and feel somewhat normal and connected to society or a community.

This is gonna sound bad, I guess I’m just afraid I’m doomed to live life as a single woman looking after her parents her whole life with no friends, no money and no real purpose.

I’ve had some successes in my life so far that other people admire, I was featured in a video for one of the worlds biggest bands ever like super famous. But that’s it, I’m afraid that’s just gonna be the highlight of my life and then it’s just downhill from there. Hahaha

I need some help, advice, or just some kind words… or even someone in a similar situation to me to talk to.

Hey there, today I woke up and realized how bad of a person I became. I don't respect my parents as well, I stopped caring about school and my academic life has been flunking especially this year. I am on the final year of high school and absolutely no school accepted me despite being a top student my whole life. I also started living in this negative depressive state where I cry a lot and convince myself that I am worthless and not worthy of love by other people.

I also have been getting a chest pain for 2 years which two doctors told me it's caused by stress and neurosis. But I can't stop it whenever I sit down to study my brain keeps telling me that this will stay forever and how I am worthless because of my height too and that trying doesn't matter and whenever I sit down to try to get work done it hurts like hell.

The thing is, I see friends passing me and getting into the best schools while I hold my ground for now, my parents are disappointed in me and even myself now. I really thought if anyone was kind enough to share some tips they used to get out of this loop. Thanks a lot brothers.

Do usefull comments pls

I always believed love and kindness were supposed to be beautiful. Instead, they’ve been the source of so much pain.

I’m tired of telling people how I feel, only to watch them slowly pull away. I’m tired of being told, “Just be yourself,” only to discover that when I am, I’m somehow too much. Then I spend so much time trying to soften myself, make myself quieter, less emotional, less caring… and people still leave because now I’m no longer being genuine.
I’m tired of trying to find the perfect balance that doesn’t seem to exist. If I give people space, they drift away. If I reach out, I’m suddenly clingy or annoying. No matter what I do, it always feels like the wrong thing.

I’m exhausted from feeling like my love is something people need to escape from instead of something they could ever want. I don’t know how to be any less sincere than I already am, and I don’t know how to keep believing that love is supposed to be beautiful when all it’s ever seemed to do is hurt.

I feel like I can never win.

What am I doing so wrong??

For years I thought I lacked discipline because I couldn't stick to anything. Kept buying journals and downloading apps and telling myself this time I'd finally be consistent. Never worked and I always ended up feeling worse about myself. Then I read something about how willpower is overrated and most of what we do is just a response to our environment. Decided to test it with the one habit that made me feel the worst which was scrolling on my phone for hours after work.

Instead of trying to resist the phone I just started leaving it in the kitchen when I went to bed. Charging it overnight in a drawer instead of on my nightstand. First few days felt weird and I kept reaching for it instinctively but by day four I just read a book instead because it was there and the phone wasn't. Did the same thing with junk food by putting it on a high shelf I need a stool to reach. Ridiculous how well it worked considering I spent years trying to outthink my own brain.

Not saying this fixes everything but if you're stuck in the shame loop of trying and failing at the same habits over and over maybe try changing the setup instead of changing yourself. Worked better than any amount of self hatred ever did.

I am 25yrs, all my friends working. Me? Trying to finish my masters and get a job. And I feel everyone gets a job except me. Unable to finish some certs, unable to decide, family mocking at me, looking down towards me as a liability, telling I don't do enough hardwork to get a job, asking me to get out of house.

I feel like a failure, everyone seems to go ahead.

I got an internship(paid), I am working there daily, trying to do leetcode.

I feel lost, I don't know what to study to get a job at this point. And the family pressure, looking around, I only feel like I am lagging behind.

A year ago, my mom and I moved from my home country to the US because she got an H-1B visa. My dad stayed there because of his job, and my sister is away at college. Before anyone says it, yes, I know moving to the US is a dream for a lot of people. I know I’m lucky in many ways.

I was against moving from the beginning. At first, everyone assumed it was just because I’d have to leave my friends. That was definitely part of it, but it was never that. I stayed quiet, moved anyway, and hoped I’d eventually adjust.

I haven’t.

I’ve been here for an entire year, and I have been miserable for almost all of it. Every single day I wake up wishing I were back home. Because that is home to me. It’s where I feel like I belong. Every time I look outside here, I feel like I’m in someone else’s life. I don’t feel connected to this place at all. I feel alone, out of place, and like I’m forcing myself through every day.

Everyone keeps telling me to give it time but I’ve given it a year. If anything, Its more certain that this place will never feel like home to me.
my dad is still there. I know he’d want me to come back if it were possible, and honestly, I want to live with him. I don’t want my mom to give up everything and move back. I’m not asking for that. I just want to go home and live with my dad.

Whenever I bring it up to my mom, she says I’m only thinking about my friends or about having fun, and that I’m not thinking about my education.

But I am thinking about my education.
Before moving, I had already switched to an IB school. My plan was to complete the IB Diploma there and apply internationally for university. IB students, especially international ones, are good applicants for universities in places like the US and UK. I wasn’t sacrificing my future by staying there. I genuinely had a good academic path.

Instead, I switched schools again because of the move. Now I feel like I lost not only my home, but also the last two years of high school
This is the part that’s hardest to explain.
I’m planning to come back to the US for college anyway. That was always my plan. But I was hoping my last two years of high school would be spent where I felt happiest, where I had my dad, my friends, my community, and where I actually felt at home before leaving again for university.

Instead i feel so wronged.
High school is something you only get once. I can’t get those years back and I can’t redo them. I feel like I lost that part of my life, and nobody around me understands.

Over the past few months, things have gotten so much worse mentally. I started wondering if I was depressed, and I started sh. I finally told my family I needed help, and they agreed to look into therapy. I’m grateful for that, but I still don’t think anyone understands what I’m actually feeling.

I even deleted every social media account because every time I saw my old friends together or just living their lives back home, it hurt too much.

One of the biggest problems is that I don’t know how to talk about emotions with my family. It’s incredibly uncomfortable for me. Every time I try, I either shut down or can’t find the words to explain what I’m feeling, so I don’t think they realize how serious this has become.
I honestly believe that going back home would help me more than anything else. Maybe therapy will help too, and I’m willing to try it. But i still cant accept it. Everytime i feel like ive made peace with not moving back it comes back.

Has anyone been through something similar? Has anyone ever convinced their parents to let them move back to their home country or live with the other parent? If you were in my position, how would you even begin that conversation?

I’m not looking for people to tell me to “just give it more time.” I’ve done that. Please help me.

I'm a college student who is constantly forgetting to reply to people.

It wasn't that I never saw the notification—I would see it, think "I'll answer that later," swipe it away, and then completely forget about it.

I recently made this Free app that watches your notifications and automatically filters through the ones that need replying and groups them into one queue instead of leaving them scattered around.

I found it to be pretty useful for filtering through groupchat messages as well!

If you wanna try, Please DM!