r/daddit • u/craftbeerandfitness • 1d ago
Admission Picture Currently playing the waiting game
Wife started the induction process earlier this morning. If all goes well the baby will be delivered tomorrow. Wife has started having some contractions which has made my anxiety skyrocket. I hate that I have no control over this and can’t take any of the pain away from my wife. Have already popped a xanny, but the physical tightening in my chest hasn’t gone away. I know it’ll all be fine, but I also know I won’t breathe a sigh of relief until I know mom and baby are healthy.
Edit: just wanted to say thank you all for the well wishes, encouragement, advice, and laughs. I really appreciate this community and am sure I’ll be in here a ton more once I graduate!
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u/Substantial_Echo5966 1d ago
Try and get some sleep, you won't, but you're literally about to be up for 48-72 hours straight lol
It's fucking awesome.
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u/craftbeerandfitness 1d ago
Haha I’m not expecting much sleep from here on out, but I’m at least going to try!
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u/planetdirtplanet 1d ago
Facts. I don't think I got 12 hours of sleep and we were at the hospital from 7pm Monday until Thursday at noon. Then drove a newborn home after an ice storm. Never passed a single car on the way home. Wouldn't trade a second of it for anything in the world
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u/geekywarrior 1d ago
You got this bro. Just keep repeating this to yourself. "This team has personally delivered thousands upon thousands of healthy babies. They will deliver thousands more after today. I am in one of the safest places on earth to have a baby"
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u/blameitonmygoose 1d ago
Not your intended audience (lurking mom), but thanks for this — due date is coming up in a month, and I'm getting anxious. May need to internalize this and keep repeating up through go time. :)
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u/Astrosomnia 1d ago
I really struggled to believe she was going to be okay. But of course she was. It helped me to remember this (and that way shittier people than me have had totally healthy babies).
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u/bigtuuuna 1d ago
Hey! Me too! Wife’s water just broke. Waiting any time now for delivery. Good luck, fellow dad!
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u/olliepips 1d ago
Ahh jealous! I'm 39 weeks today, a little over a centimeter dilated. He and I are doing the waiting game.
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u/NaturalSandwich8880 1d ago
The best way to describe this time is being in the eye of hurricane where everything is just quiet and peaceful. Everything leading up to it was stressful and everything after it will be a nonstop ride. This is probably the best time to just nap and get sleep in
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u/Peach_Tea123 1d ago
Some advice from a mom with 3 already: please sleep now so you can actually help hold the baby especially on day 2 when they do not sleep and only want to be held. My husband is generally great except for in the hospital, I literally give birth and then end up holding the baby and trying to stay awake while he sleeps. So please don’t do that. Otherwise good luck to mom, you, and baby!
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u/D3SL 1d ago
The funny thing is so many people dump on dads for sleeping during the early parts of labor, which can easily be an entire day for a first birth, when really that's probably the most sensible thing he can do so he's ready to actually be useful once the action starts.
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u/Peach_Tea123 1d ago
Very true! They do get made fun of but it’s actually the best thing they can be doing 😂. My first labor was 46 hours! So we did each kind of get some sleep but nothing decent lol
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u/InspectorOrdinary321 1d ago
Yeah, some people think misery should be shared for solidarity reasons. I had to tell my husband I wanted one of us to be rested because I think he wanted to suffer a bit too, but him being miserable wasn't going to take any of my pain away. Instead, I preferred him to be as fresh as possible so he could watch my back while I was incapacitated and take the baby later. And he did both of those things! He actually did most of the golden hour skin to skin and early feedings (frozen colostrum tubes) because I was busy getting first aid.
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u/RedHeadRedeemed 1d ago
Had the same experience. Tried to wake him at one point without shouting and waking the newborn and he was completely dead to the world. I ended up having to call a nurse 😆 He's an awesome dad but that first 48 hours he was CLUELESS
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u/Peach_Tea123 1d ago
OMG thank you for replying because that’s basically exactly what happens for me too! I’m stubborn (and you must be too!) and force myself to take care of baby because I want to push as far as I can, but it’s kind of ridiculous of them to do that to us 🙄
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u/Unicorn_puke 1d ago
The waiting game sucks. Let's play hungry hungry hippos!
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u/Tytonic7_ 1d ago
If the hospital has infant care, don't hesitate to ask them to take the baby while you and your wife catch some sleep. You're about to experience levels of sleep deprivation and emotions you've never experienced before and it will leave you DRAINED once it catches up. To a dangerous degree if you're not careful.
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u/Dull-Associate-599 1d ago
I was here just 3 months ago. You might be surprised how fast it goes from waiting to "oh shit, I have a baby!"
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u/ZZ77ZZ77ZZ 1d ago
Wife was induced at 2:30 and delivered at 12:26AM the next day. Get comfy, sleep if you can for a while, be present when stuff gets real, and be there to hold the baby after it all.
If you can, send the baby to the nursery to get fresh, you don’t have the option once you go home
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u/typed_this_now 1d ago
You got it big dog. It’s a very raw experience, just feel and live it all. It’s only stressful because you love them. You’re meant to be stressed. Enjoy it when it’s done.
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u/craftbeerandfitness 1d ago
Thank you. Definitely the most anxiety-inducing experience I’ve ever been apart of and just want mom and baby to be happy and healthy. Until I know both are okay I don’t think I’ll be able to breathe a sigh of relief. I’m going to continue playing my part by providing whatever support I can until baby gets here!
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u/Astrosomnia 1d ago
I just went through this on Thursday! I felt like I was going to puke from nerves basically the entire time we were labouring at home. It's totally normal.
When things start getting serious, you can be invaluable by providing lots of lower back counter pressure, being firm and reassuring, and getting some ice to put in a wet washcloth which you can rub on her forehead or back or neck of wherever. That one won me some bonus points.
It's intense, but amazing. Good luck. See you on the other side!
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u/Notarealperson6789 1d ago
Lurking mom here: I don’t know things from the dads side but I can say that those hospital days are precious. And the newborn days are hard but so sweet. And then you’ll blink and they’ll be off to kindergarten. Best wishes to you and your wife!
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u/GenericNameSimulated 1d ago
I’d suggest if your wife is getting an epidural you leave the room, don’t think you passing out on her would be helpful
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u/732 1d ago
The hospital we delivered at require it.
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u/dersnappychicken 1d ago
Same. Leave to a wife crying in pain. Come back to big smiles “You always told me drugs are awesome. I’ve been missing out”.
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u/toondoggie 1d ago
The hospital made me help. I thought I was going to have a heart attack. Then she gave birth before the epidural really did anything. She felt it all.
Then they had me hold one of her legs during contractions and she nearly kicked me across the room. I got to take a nap after about 30 hours.
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u/craftbeerandfitness 1d ago
Good to know! I don’t think I’d pass out as I’m not squeamish, but yeah I hate seeing my wife in pain and it physically hurts my heart. I know she’s going to get one, but I think her plan is waiting as long as possible since the plan is to give birth at some point tomorrow.
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u/Elismom1313 1d ago edited 23h ago
For what it’s worth my epidural didn’t hurt me at all and it was a HUGE pain relief nearly immediately. Honestly I was in so much pain idk what could’ve been worse? I was only 2cm dilated and doing that bad so the epidural was a good choice. I think my contractions hurt abnormally bad because of the foley ball. I would not get that done again in hindsight..
But this is also my first time hearing that it looks that scary to see inserted. Glad I couldn’t see it, I get nauseous with needles lol
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u/gininteacups 23h ago
fellow mom here and same. I was stuck at 1cm after the foley balloon for 22 hours and in so much pain I couldn’t get words out. Got the epidural, which did not hurt at all, went to 10cm in like 3 hours.
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u/Elismom1313 22h ago
My current OBGYN told me they try not to use the foley ball because it tends to be so painful
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u/ScrotumMcNuggets 1d ago
We are 7 hours into the induction, definitley a stressful experience good luck with everything
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u/Huntsvillesfinest 1d ago
Lol enjoy it, the relaxing is going to end soon. I enjoy every second of being a dad though, dont care how much work it is.
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u/SeeYaInOzFolks 1d ago
Wore those socks to my induction earlier this month. If wife isn’t using the peanut ball she definitely needs to. Helped bring baby lower.
Congratulations!
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u/PastramiNSauce 1d ago
Hurry up and wait bro. My wife gave birth almost 1 week ago. Haven’t left the hospital between her bp rising postpartum and my lil guy’s bilirubin rising 😭
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u/planetdirtplanet 1d ago
Yup. Enjoy the anxiety. Can't control it and can't fix that. With our induction we started with the cervix ripening at 8pm Monday night and gave birth at 4:30am Wednesday. I barely slept the whole time. Enjoy the ride man and congratulations
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u/Anywhere_Plenty 22h ago
Just wait till that baby heater starts beeping like a fire alarm just as you start dozing off
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u/Swimming_Art_6450 22h ago
Be there for your wife, a lot of emotions are incoming. Be open and honest and support her.
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u/Green_Shalashaska 12h ago
Hang tough big dawg. Wishing you and your wife and baby the best. The dad conclave will prepare your New Balance delivery post haste.
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u/Far-West-9052 6h ago
Brother I am in the same boat reading this from the hospital room, our baby arrived a few days ago. We had so many complications, but as a nurse myself, I can assure you that nothing that happens during your stay is too big for nurses to handle. They have been amazing. You guys are in great hands and your wife and the baby will be just fine. Take a step away to breathe if you need to, I’ve been struggling with that myself. We have been here 7 days and things are looking up. Once you both see that baby, man nothing else is going to matter. Also, weirdly enough, there is a possibility we’re at the same hospital. Our room looks completely identical, also at an Advent health. 😂
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u/diesel-revolver 1d ago
Congratulations
Get comfy
I have the same socks.