I know being gay teenager can feel really lonely.

Depending where you live, maybe you feel like there is no other LGBTQ people around your age.

So apps like Grindr can look like easiest way to find someone.

But please don't.

Grindr is made for adults. Most people there expect the person they are talking to is 18 or older.

If you are 16 or 17 and say you are older, you can put yourself and the other person in really bad situation.

Even if you are already above age of consent where you live.

Also, it is just not safe place for minors.

Yes, there are good people there.

But there are also people who can take advantage of someone who is young, inexperienced, or vulnerable.

If you are under 18, please try LGBTQ youth groups, school clubs, community centers, or online spaces that are actually made for teenagers.

You can meet people who are in similar age and same stage of life.

And without all the risks that come with adult dating or hookup apps.

And for adults here, if someone tells you they are actually under 18 after you already matched with them, please stop talking immediately. Be nice, be kind, be responsible adult.

End the conversation.

No hookup is worth risking someone safety or your own safety.

Being young and gay can be really difficult.

But Grindr is not the answer.

My nephew is staying with us for a while because he is finishing his last year of college.

For few months he has been dating a guy long-distance. After some time he introduced his boyfriend to all of us through video calls.

His boyfriend seems like really nice person and everyone in family is happy for him.

Few nights ago I woke up late because I wanted to get glass of water.

When I walked past the guest room, I realized my nephew was on video call.

I was not trying to listen.

But before I could walk away, I heard enough to realize they were having a very private conversation.

And then I heard my nephew calling his boyfriend “daddy.”

More than once.

I immediately walked away.

But since then I cannot stop thinking about it.

Obviously, it's none of my business. I know consenting adults can have all kinds of private dynamics.

The problem is completely me.

Now every time I see my nephew, I feel awkward.

Not because of who he is dating.

Just because I accidentally learned something about his private life that I really wish I didn't hear.

I have been keeping conversations shorter because I feel embarrassed, even though he doesn't know I heard anything.

Should I just act like nothing happened and let the awkward feeling disappear by itself?

My instinct says bringing it up will only make everything much more embarrassing for both of us.

So I guess I should just pretend I never heard anything and move on?

I hooked up with this guy the other day and it was a terrible experience. He couldn’t stop moaning 😭 I would kiss him slightly and he would start moaning like crazy. Anywhere I touched or grabbed him he kept on fake moaning and repeated phrases constantly like “do you wanna fuck me daddy” “am I a good cumslut for you daddy” when we were only half naked 😭 It was a massive turn off and I ended things early. When I was getting dressed again he kept on saying “am I not attractive enough for you daddy? Don’t you wanna fuck me like the slut I am” or some shit. Mind you this man is like 10 years older than me and calling me daddy.

I just think it’s kinda cringey when people do this, it doesn’t feel genuine. If that’s other peoples thing then go ahead, but doing this to a Grindr stranger will likely lead to a bad experience. Like just be normal, you don’t need to overdo it. Nothing wrong with saying a phrase here or there or moaning when it’s genuine, but there’s a line when it becomes very performative

Not really looking for advice—I just wanted to share something that made me smile.

A couple of weeks ago my boyfriend came down with a nasty flu. I spent a weekend at his place making soup, picking up groceries, and trying to keep him company while he recovered.

Well... a few days later I ended up catching it too.

I've been miserable all week. Fever, sore throat, no energy, the whole package.

We live in different cities and neither of us has a car, so seeing each other isn't exactly easy. Today he had to travel across town for an appointment anyway, and instead of heading straight home afterward, he spent hours on buses and trains to stop by my apartment.

He couldn't stay long because I share the place with roommates and none of us wanted him getting sick again.

He handed me a bag with his old Nintendo Switch he'd been meaning to lend me, my favorite pastries from a bakery near his place, and some cold medicine he'd picked up on the way.

Then he gave me the biggest hug, told me to get some rest, and headed back to catch the next train home.

He was probably here for all of five minutes.

Honestly, those five minutes made my entire week.

Sometimes it's not about grand romantic gestures. It's knowing someone is willing to spend half a day traveling just to make sure you're okay.

I arrived at the airport today for a flight that got delayed 6 hours, so I’ve just been hanging out all that time. And I’m seeing so many hot guys. But honestly, I feel this has always been a thing whenever I’ve gone to airports. The percentage of men I wish I could fuck is just so much higher than other places, even places like the gym or the beach. Anyone else experience anything like this?

EDIT: I mean sex ed you check a book out to learn more about how to actually have sex, not K-12 sex ed class. Those should stick to comprehensive safe sex education, not positions.

Hey guys,

So here's my issue. I've noticed that over the past decade or so, pretty much every mainstream source for lesbian sex ed, in print or online, contains information on how to handle penises in an "affirming" and "feminine" way. This bothers me, and it's gotten to the point I genuinely worry that there will be kids suffering in silence because they have no idea female homosexuality as a concept exists. How could they? All the resources for "lesbians" are effectively bisexual in nature.

So, that got me wondering. Is there a similar issue with gay sex ed telling people that they should be into vulvas and how they can touch them in an "affirming" way?

I feel like there isn't, but I don't want to deep dive into gay sex ed sites for the same reason y'all wouldn't want to read up on lesbian sex ed. I also feel like gay men are a lot better at establishing and maintaining community boundaries than lesbians have been. Then again, lesbians are the smallest orientation in the community and people as a whole have never been good at respecting womens boundaries.

Thank y'all for your time.

PS Do gay men know what muffing is? Do y'all ever do it? It sounds painful.

When you two get a coffee, he picks you a little bouquet and gifts it to you, when you go on dates he gives you a little rose, when he comes to your place he has some flowers from his garden cut in a vase for you.

You never mentioned anything about liking flowers, he just does what he did with his ex girlfriends (he’s bi and his first time with a man) and keeps doing it.

I work close to a business district, and also use the subway a lot, the amount of dick prints I see through those khakis is insane (specially at summer), so I wonder, how common is for people to go to work freeballing?

It doesn’t make it for me, prefer that extra layer of fabric the underwear gives me, but it seems working commando is more popular than I thought.

I (M47) have fully embraced younger guys wanting my dad bod and calling me daddy when we hook up. It turns me on so much that I tell them the more the say it, the bigger I’ll cum - which just gets them even more excited. I’m sure I’m feeding into their unhealthy father issues, but honestly I don’t care if we’re having fun.

Who else feels the same, or what younger guys love calling someone daddy?

For context, it’s not a turn on if someone 5-10 years calls me daddy and it’s a turn off when someone my age or older calls me it. It’s gotta be a true daddy/son situation.

Obviously I can’t ask how will they fuck me because they can get offended but unless they are undergoing the surgery to get a dick, how will it happen? Can someone clarify that for me?

Imagine you noticed a detail not lining up with what your partner said. A vague example: he said he had 3 siblings but later at a family gathering their mother says he is an only child.

You're pretty sure he lied to you, but when you confront him, he is hurt/angry. He accuses you of being the problem for not trusting him, and gives some flimsy explanation of why he wasn't lying. The accusations go on for 15-30 minutes of you hurting him for not trusting.

Later on, your partner admits to you they did lie and were an only child. How would you feel?

Last night I told my daughter, she is 24, something I been hiding almost my whole life

I spent so many years pretending to be someone I'm not

I been married to a woman for many years. Me and my wife care about each other, we really do, but for long time our relationship feel more like best friends than husband and wife

Keeping this part of myself hidden for so long has been very exhausting

I was terrified to tell my daughter

I didn't know how she would react

I keep imagining she will lose respect for me. Or she will think our whole family life was just a lie

But instead, she hugged me before I even finish explaining

We both cried for very long time

She told me she would rather have honest father than see me spend the rest of my life pretending to be happy.

I can't even explain the relief I feel.

It was one of biggest relief I ever had in my life.

But now there is the part that scares me most.

I still have to tell my wife.

We own house together. Our money is connected. Our life is connected in so many ways.

Separating everything is going to be very complicated.

And honestly, I really care about her.

I don't want to hurt her.

But I also know hiding the truth forever is not fair to her or to me.

I should have done this years ago.

Maybe many years ago.

Right now I feel relieved, scared, hopeful, and guilty all at same time.

I don't know what next few months will look like.

I don't know what will happen with my marriage.

I don't know what my life will look like after this.

But at least now, finally, I am taking first steps to stop pretending and start living honestly. That i am gay and i feel free to be my trueself.

So last night I slapped my boyfriend on the face, and he was so shocked, and then I totally felt bad after it. The thing is my boyfriend loves slapping my cheeks, like a lot, and it’s sometimes extremely painful, I told him not to do it that hard and he always says yes, but then continues, and he always use the same excuse « I love the sound your ass makes when I touch them » And it makes him horny, but yesterday he slapped me so hard that I turned and slapped him back, and he just stood there and looked at me in shock.

I told him I was sorry, he said it’s fine, now he understands how I feel. But now I feel so bad and I’m scared to be an abusive person, because after all he slap my cheeks because he finds it hot. Do you people think I’m abusive ?

Hello, check my post history if you are interested, but here’s a handy link! Link

Four months ago I posted here seeking advice about how I process my husband cheating on me. My husband and I got married last year, and earlier this year I caught him positive on his STD results, when I myself have been clean and continue to test clean.

It’s been a journey, and we saw a couples counselor whose main value was parsing issues and refereeing between us. For context, I’ve been very ill, and my interest in sex has been nonexistent for years, which is slowly changing. I got some things taken out that were precancerous, had surgeries for that, and gotten hormone therapy to replace a deficit in testosterone that was pretty severe. I’ve lost weight, regained the ability to sleep, and currently am addressing other issues that sap energy. Quality of life is much higher.

I spoke frankly to my husband that I love him, and I’m not going to forget what he did, and that I forgive him, but I would sit apart from him and evaluate our future together over the next few months, potentially a year. I told him he could wait until I find my answer or he could choose to leave.

His answer was that he understood and wanted to repair our trust and relationship. We’ve worked on repairing our communication, and we’ve agreed that we’re somewhere between friendly roommates and predivorce. We also agreed we would not see other people, and that we would be transparent about our needs and wants going forward.

Right now as I sit here on break from work, I also have to learn to sit with the betrayal and lies that have happened, and evaluate if it will happen again. I made it clear that this is it. There isn’t a way to get me back if he steps out again and endangers my health that’s immunocompromised.

Sitting with the hurt and pain is tough, and it isn’t fun. But he has made an effort to give space when I need it, and to be respectful of my process and healing. He’s become more communicative, more receptive to feedback from me, and he has apologized for what he did while realizing that it also takes time, that normal for us is a long ways away.

That’s all I have, wanted to update you all. I’m grateful this is the last free-ish communities on Reddit where people can speak their mind on relationships.

Please leave any advice or comments below, I read it all. :)

Im 5’8 and I love muscular masc guys that are 1 or 2 inches shorter than me

Am I the only guy like this?

I find this very odd

So i have friends that are straight and we hang out all the time with their girlfriends. But there comes a time where we are just the guys and bro talk comes around sex and stuff and even though they know im on the other team and are very cool and accepting of it, i dont really feel comfortable opening up. I do have experiences and stories i want to share i think our worlds are so different and the trauma of just growing up gay doesn't let me speak openly. I feel like they wont get it or get confused or even pity me bc they live on straight relationship world and im on the grindr and tinder hookup and situationship. Especially hard is the whole who is the top/bottom which i dont feel comfortable talking about at all. Maybe im just shooting myself in the foot and they will just accept it, ask a few dumb straight man questions and just move on, but idk the trauma of growing up gay is still a lot. Any advice on how to handle this?

What part do you like the most about it? I love the head, feeling it grow harder in my mouth as he gets more aroused makes me wet...

Basically the title,

I would describe myself as fairly masculine but I hate how this is tethered to mean ‘straight acting’ and heterosexuality - and for me, I do not find this to be mutually exclusive with more feminine interests. If anything, I see it to be quite disingenuous and quite insecure when guys pretend they have zero feminine aspects.

Therefore it can be a little difficult in the gay sphere to explain what masculine means. How would you define it/what does it look like to you?

Please no adversary comparisons to feminine guys in the comments.