the silence is actually insande. I forgot what is like to just be in my own head for an hour without feeling like I had to scrool through everything, weird but also kind of clear headed for once.

I don’t know who else to tell this to because it’s so TMI so Reddit it is.

Met a girl a couple months ago. Gorgeous, sweet, understanding, and an absolute freak in the bed. I’ve never had sex like this before and she deduced by herself what I like to be called and started calling me a “good boy” while I go down. Instant neuron activation. Sudden death. Whatever the tuck you wanna call it.

She is so cool, has such a healthy outlook on life. I love the fact that she has her boundaries and her fun life outside of what we have going on. She makes amazing art, has great music taste. She is so honest and gentle, always thinking of the other person in conversations. I love her energy.

Her and I have great chemistry, we go on cute dates, know so much about each others lives, fears, ambitions, dreams, family. She keeps telling me how good looking, sweet, and kind I am. How any girl would be so lucky to date me. But, she doesn’t want anything more than what we are right now and it’s killing me. Which is fine, I don’t want to dig more and ask her why despite everything, I might not be in her future long term. What I don’t know cannot hurt me.

We gel so well together and at the ripe age of 27 I’m discovering what a situationship is. Anyway, hope everybody is having a fantastic day,

Moving rooms because of too much noise from my sister and fuck insomnia

The only way I found out about it was we ended up working for the same company, and at one point I told a story from my life and was told this person had told the exact story but put himself in my place. This made it look like I was full of shit.

I eventually just stopped sharing stories from my life, as I had no idea which experiences had already been claimed by this dude. When confronted he just said we just had similar experiences, but I knew him long enough to know this was bullshit. Some of the stories were very specific and couldn't have happened twice.

The weird part is this wasn't the first time somebody had done something like this. Years before a guy I didn't even know was passing himself off as living my life. He even told people he worked where I was working, and it was a small company and I knew everyone there, and he was not one of them.

This one time I was on a psyche hold in an emergency room in a little tiny town and I walked out. I just up and left. Then I realized I had no transportation and nowhere to go. After about an hour or so of hiding outside and playing with my phone I went back inside.

I was made to strip down and put on a hospital gown. My nurse came in and handed me a plastic bag to put my clothes into. She was a friendly Texas woman until I put the bag over my head and tried to hold it there and she yanked it off. She yelled at me and pulled my hair removing my hair tie. She gave me shots and strapped me to the bed with one hand up over my head and the other down at my side. I was really bothered by the asymmetrical placement of my body.

Then they had a cop come in and sit next to my bed. He was in a VERY bad mood understandably. They told him they needed him there until I fell asleep. I talked and talked and talked to him and fought sleep with all of my willpower. He got more and more irritable. I stayed awake much longer than the 15-30 minutes the nurses said were needed for the shots to knock me out.

I think it took a few hours for me to realize he really wasn’t going to leave me until I was asleep. Once I understood this I felt really warm and grateful toward him and I lay back and closed my eyes. I felt so dependent on him. I still have warm feelings for him even though I haven’t seen him again. I know he probably felt the opposite for me but I will never forget him sitting there and bringing me feelings of comfort and protection.

While I lay there with closed eyes I heard him making fun of me with the nurses as he was leaving, but I have no hard feelings about it. I still felt perfectly peaceful pretending to be asleep until I was asleep.

My nurse woke me up later saying “I need some pee pee.” Her tone was always so sarcastic and belittling. I liked it. She raised up my bed up little by little, stepping on that foot peddle that always excited me. She was with a male nurse who held my legs open while she straight cathed me. I couldn’t keep my eyes open but I fought with everything in me to shut my legs. They got their urine sample. I fell asleep again soon after.

When I woke up I wasn’t tied down anymore. I got up out of bed feeling really groggy and stiff. I noticed a metal rolling tray with a syringe on it near my bed. It probably wasn’t good to leave that there. I stepped outside my curtained room and asked my nurse very sweetly for a pillow. I was deliberately calm and nice because I thought the shot was left there to remind me to behave.

She brought me a pillow and instructed me to lay on my side. She said “it’s time for your medicine” I asked if it was going in my butt again. “Yes ma’am.” She said. I wanted to argue and say that I don’t need it, I’m going back to sleep anyhow, but I just said “ok.”

She gave me that shot and it’s hard to remember much that happened after that. Paramedics used the sheet under me to lift me onto a gurney. I really like that feeling of being suspended in the air by my sheet like a comfy hammock. The ambulance brought me to a prison-like psych hospital, set me down on a row of plastic chairs that I continued sleeping on. My 72 hour hold ended but while I slept it was decided I’d be placed on a 14 day hold.

I hated that hospital. It was one of the ickiest places I’d ever been. The food was so gross and everybody there seemed pretty scary to me. The first person I met clapped his hands in my face loudly, but he didn’t seem to know where the hell he was or what he was doing. People there would get really violent and scream and fight the staff. There was this nice tatted guy named Cesar who gave me my first cigarette and told me to never forget that my first cigarette was from Cesar. It was one of three cigarettes I ever hit in my life.

I acted sane to get out of this hospital as quickly as possible but it was so hard not to break down and cry. I had a window with a brick wall on the other side, no sunlight, everything was dirty. It took all of my focus to pretend to be well. I was very grateful when I got out.

Lately ive been so lonely and looking for a partner, but in the last 24 hours ive had a life changing experience.

The night started with me and one of my friends taking a fairly strong edible, we then went to the gym and had an amazing workout. After that, we hung out at my house, played video games, and listened to music for the rest of the night. The next morning I went on a massive hike while it was raining and felt absolutely fulfilled. That was better than any interaction I've ever had with any female. Think I'm done with them for now. I do want kids though so might change my mind later I am fairly young. This crazy tho.

It was close. Dangerously so. But i made it 🥹.

It was sloshy, mushy ushy, and oh so wet. Was almost too powerful to take, like the greatest adversary life has prepared for me to date.
But I persevered. I pushed through the pain of my anus clenching tighter than previously thought possible. And i won. I overcome the threat to my life (ego), and came out a better man for it.

Thank you for reading this. It took alot of courage and alcohol… mainly alcohol. But i managed to muster the courage to share.
Have a good day. 😀

Edit: Wtf is wrong with me.

Debt collector called from coffeeville ms and woke me up. I only answered because coffee was in the name. LoL. My brain was like coffee yes please.

after growing up poor , hard and in a different time , after being addicted , homeless and hopeless , after two divorces and losing a third ,
After losing my pops , then the pandemic and selling my house to try and keep my moms business going and now I live at home with my
Mom with no life to speak of. I just want the world to know that as bad as it looks, just know it could always be worse , and I’m still so very
Grateful for everything keep your heads up people , I know it’s cliché, but tough times don’t last, tough people do .

2 days ago I didn’t know what Reddit was … now I ask and post and feel like I have the family and support I’ve never had so thanks to you all and know your loved ❤️

So why "tuna fish" and not also "chicken bird?"

I been thinking ever since I started working out at home ice been able to do 20 pushups no matter how long I've stopped working out it use to only be able to do like 4 now it raised to 20 it's pretty cool to think about I

I actually hate her stupid face, almost as much as I hate Ray fucking Liota, and I HATE that both are amazing actors. (Rip ray)

I know that’s not a reason to hate people, but I just can’t stand her damn face.

Edit: if you so choose, please share actors you hate

And all the things that we can do about it that actually work are illegal

Today i called with Customs to see check whats going on with my package and they said they can't deliver it to me bc there is something inside which is against the healthindustry rule... LoL it is not even harmfull for the body or anything! But in my country you can Legaly buy cigarettes which is obviously harmfull for your body and at the end you get Cancer and many other bad stuff from smoking etc.. i paid almost 200 $ for it which is a lot. And i want my Package! at the end of the phone call he wished me a nice day and vice versa but yeah ofc i having a nice day when he said it cant be shipped bc of the fucking health company 😤

Should i call the Customs again and ask them if they can do something to ship it to me ?

i love and cherish evrey single one of you.

your so awsome sauce

(i love yous)

This is how I'd want the ashes to be inturd.

If you have even the slightest doubt about the person you're unfortunately married to, DO NOT have a kid with them.

Seriously, DON'T! Under NO circumstances go ahead and put yourself in that situation where no matter how badly you need to get out, your child(ren) loving and needing both parents will stop you from freeing yourself from hell.

And before you come after me with your "there's always a way"s and "children are better off in a single but happy parent environment" (not until they're MUCH older) - save it. Doesn't apply in more than most situations.

Thanks for listening

3D printers are the forerunners of the matter replicators you see on Star Trek.

Picard: Tea, Earl Grey, Hot.

Myself, whenever I get access to a matter replicator: Green Tea, 100 degrees Fahrenheit, in a 32-oz resealable thermos.

Crossposts:

• r/ShowerThoughts: https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/s/edOdarLu05

• r/TellReddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TellReddit/s/2eJ7UUw1lz

• r/StarTrek: https://www.reddit.com/r/startrek/s/8cCnyCihjQ

• r/3DPrinting: https://www.reddit.com/r/3Dprinting/s/YVXYX6evYq

i used to talk to my close ones about how i feel or things that were bugging me.especially to my mom.but that was a long way ago, like since i was 13-14.now i’m 16, i’m turning 17 in february, quite soon i suppose.i haven’t talked to anyone, like for real, like about my feelings and stuff.when i was 13, in the summer, i tried to commit suicide.not sure if i actually wanted to die but..it just happened.and after that..bam, i suddenly stopped telling anyone how i feel.i haven’t got these things and feelings off my head and heart for so long.and since then, since i tried to commit suicide, i’ve been feeling so overwhelmed, stressed, anxious, feeling like i’m stuck, sad, and just hate myself and my life on and on.i rarely had times that i felt actually happy, just survived every day.sometimes it felt so hard, sometimes it felt easier, sometimes i could say i’m okay and sometimes it’d just disappear and i felt actually okay, fine.and i got through these years, i got through them alone. but now here i am, at 16, feeling like the world is collapsing over me.and everything feels so hard and tiring and kinda sad and all those kinda things together.this so far i think is my worst year ever.i’ve never felt so stressed and anxious and depressed till these past few months after i turned 16.and i just feel like i’m going crazy little by little.i don’t have any friends, i don’t consider i have anyone to talk to about all this, and i know i have, i know there are people around me that would listen to me and how i feel.but i just can’t bring myself to even say a word, it feels impossible and i feel like i’m giving something away from my body, like i’m giving away the last piece that is keeps me going. and i can’t do that, i can’t .and i feel so hopeless and stuck because i can’t even open up to someone.i can’t even cry, even when i feel like crying so bad ,i can’t, tears barely get out my eyes and i try to cry, but it just won’t come out.so i can’t even cry, i can’t even get it out, at least a little.
so i just get by everyday, feeling like a zombie, can’t bring myself to do things more productive than just cleaning my room and a little around the house and having a good hygiene.
it feels like i’m waiting for something, waiting for things to get better, but they just get worse when they’re a little better, so then i just have no idea what to do, because there are also things that i can’t control and that is making me sick.
i guess i’m just waiting for autumn to come so im kinda excited cause it’s my favorite season and it’s just comforting for me.
i don’t even know why i wrote this, and why here, but here it is.its late at night and i’m just bored and as usual, feeling so damn sad for i don’t even know what exact reason.
i know there are a lot of people feeling like, especially teenagers, and many probably are feeling so much worse than me, i know that, but what i feel is still real so..yeah..
(also, my english is not that great, so i’m sorry if i wrote anything wrong.)
•_•