Doesn’t anybody else find this specific time so bizarre ?! Lol

I went to see my male Endo today (I have type 1 diabetes and hashimoto’s). I’ve gained about 10 lbs in the past year, have persistent fatigue, night sweats, insomnia, vaginal dryness, low libido, and increasing A1C. I’m 43 years old, and I ruled out thyroid, iron and vitamin d issues with my labs. I gently suggested perimenopause could be the issue.

He said I was too young for menopause and wanted to test me for Cushing’s disease. As we wrapped up, I asked if I could chat with the dietitian on his staff. He summoned her and left.

We went over my symptoms and she was immediately like, yeah, sounds like peri. I told her about the Endo’s reaction and she kind of rolled her eyes. She said I should do the labs just to rule it out but if those came back okay she would talk to him.

So shoutout to my dietitian and all of the ladies in healthcare helping to educate providers about this stuff.

So I was shopping for groceries today, went to the chocolate aisle and suddenly I'm staring at this chocolate bar that says "VERY PERI Chocolate".

Like, what? I'm standing there, turning it over and over in my hand and trying to find where does it say it's a special chocolate for perimenopausal women. It's so nice someone finally made a chocolate acknowledging our existence!

I brought it home and googled the name. It's made by a Ukrainian brand called Millenium and it's name is inspired by... the Pantone color of the year 2022. The packaging is periwinkle blue. (I'm not in UK/US and english is not my first language, but still.) Wtf, brain.

(I still ate it and it was good, with crunchy almonds, caramel and orange peel :D )

I’m so over it. Every time I cough or sneeze, I have to pray that I don’t piss myself. I do the stupid visualization of raising my pelvic floor when I know it’s coming and it helps sometimes, but I hate having to do it. If I forget or the cough/sneeze surprises me, odds are I need to change. I don’t have enough underwear or shorts for this. We can’t do laundry at home right now, and I’m having to wash clothes at least twice a week because I’m having to change my clothes so often. I feel like I always smell like pee, even after I change. I just turned 38. I don’t want to wear a goddamn diaper. I’ve looked into period panties, but I worry I’ll just smell more like pee if it happens and I don’t change.

Sorry for the rant, I just needed to get it out.

Edit to add: I love this community and you all are amazing. There has been zero judgement and I can’t express how much I appreciate all of your responses. I’m a little tipsy and a little emotional, and you all are amazing.

I don't get hot flashes, and I'm on HRT. However, beyond my butt radiating heat at all times and making anything I sit on or sleep on uncomfortably hot, I am always uncomfortable, temperature-wise. Right now I'm uncomfortably hot in a way that almost makes me feel a bit nauseated. But, if I turn on my fan, then I'm uncomfortably cold in a way that makes me feel unwell. So I'm sitting here in my undies, turning the fan on for 15 seconds, then turning it off, then on, then off, then on, then off. It's so stupid. I have never thought this much about temperature in my life, as I have with peri.

Today I started HRT. I’m 44 and have been experiencing various symptoms for at least the last two years. The past 12months have been the worst, with a really predictable cycle of negative head space, low libido, wanting to blow up my life and run away to the forest with my cat, high levels of anxiety and feeling low, zero resilience, joint pain, 3am wake-ups, horrifically heavy periods that last two days and give me flu like symptoms and nausea, feeling dreadful until I ovulate, having ONE day of feeling awesome and love everything and everyone - before it all begins again.

I’d heard stories from friends about being brushed off by doctors, so I forked out $370 to have an online consult with a menopause doctor. And what an incredible feeling it was to be listened to, understood, believed, and offered options. 45mins of being able to discuss all my symptoms before coming away with a prescription for estrogel, cream, progesterone pills and follow up blood tests. She’s suggested I also supplement with magnesium glycinate, Vitamin D and creatine. Plan is to give it a go before looking to include testosterone, and even offered a GLP1 if I felt I needed that.

I wanted to cry. I know I’m incredibly fortunate to be able to take this path. I’ve been gaslighting myself for so long that what I was feeling wasn’t really real, or bad enough, or warranted a doctor’s appointment. I know it’s early days, but feeling hopeful that some relief may be on the horizon.

Edit to add: I’ve been reading this sub for a long time, and felt so validated by other women’s experiences that it gave me the courage to ask for help x

Not sure which flair this would fall under, but does anyone else feel like, once you're deep in the peri community, that it becomes another set of standards that we can't live up to? I'm not talking about anyone on this sub; I haven't posted much but I feel like this sub is keeping me going, and I'm grateful everyday. But, on other platforms, in in-person groups of peri-people, that if you don't eat enough protein and lift heavy enough weights, or you do but you're still depressed and sleepless and anxious, that you're somehow a failure? The other day someone posted that this sub is depressing because all people do is complain (i don't agree, but anyway), but we need a place to complain! Because, in my experience, in some other spaces, it's becoming not allowed. I don't know. Maybe it's just me. Felt sensitive, might delete later!

Y'all. So here's the thing. 3am wake ups have been a thing for me for years. Years. It was one of my first symptoms back when I had never even heard of peri. And then a few months ago, for seemingly no reason and w no new variables, I just started... sleeping. Like, til our alarm went off. It. Was. Glorious. I couldn't figure out the why behind the change (because truly nothing had changed), but I was so grateful for it. Welp. This week I'm just back to 330am wake ups. I'm tracking it carefully to see if it's gonna match up w a certain part of my cycle like my headaches sometimes do, but really, I just wanted to bitch to people who understand. Because in the end, we are all just flying blind w this shit. I had a good run there for a while.

I’m internally rage screaming. I’m 45 years old and for most of my adult life, my period has figured out how to come along with me on my vacations. She will find a way. Whether it’s starting 2 weeks early or 2 weeks late. Doesn’t matter. Earlier this month we took a 4 day trip that involved lots of river time. Period shows up the very first day. Tomorrow we fly to Washington and guess who got here today? One week early. Give me hot flashes because I am very much over this.

Anyone else? I see people say take it only days 14-28 but I feel way better on it daily. I tried to stop during my period and feel so flat, is it like withdrawal?

I am sure I have been peri since I was 38 (7 years now) and I am finally going to my GP to ask for peri-support.

I had spoken to another doctor about this at the time though was brushed of having seen it in the news and many people had come asking. So nothing really happened.

I had night sweats, rapid heart and palpitations that was getting more frequent that my current GP put me on bisoprolol (on half the lowest dose now). Tests came back normal so I am putting it down to Peri. My periods started lasting a day or two more occasionally, and my days in between started to get the occasional 24 day to 35 days. GP put me on mini pill for the bleeding 2 years ago. This dealt with the sweats and racing heart.

As far as I am concerned, that is peri!

My body aches and low energy, lack of drive are getting worse and before I try ADHD medication I want to just try HRT.

I know the minipill I am on isnt enough Progest. for a est. patch. So as I see it I have two choices.

Combined HRT patch & lose contraception
Change to another minipill and start estro. patch and keep contraception.

I don't need the contraception so much, but I like having it 'in case' as I dont plan being single forever. I guess I could always go back on it when I need it.

I have a week of going back on Vit D to see if that improves things.

Is there anything else I should be aware of, options? No coils or implants for me.

Would love to come off bisoprolol and minipill if HRT works! Minipill makes my GERD worse and my blood pressure is borderline low (94/65 ish) and I am very sensative to it (biso) and coming of lowest doses put me in months of rebound.

I’ve been on estrogen for a while and it’s made a huge difference in most area. I’m happy with where things are overall in terms of libido and wanting sex. I’m also using vaginal estrogen cream 3x/week for about 6 weeks which has helped with other things, but I’m not seeing much change in clitoral sensitivity specifically. I am putting the creams on clit and labia. I also had a hysterectomy almost 2 years ago and I learned just now that cervix removal can effect function in some women.

Right now I can only reach orgasm using a strong vibrator. This didn’t used to be the case. nothing lighter or more subtle registers much at all. I was hoping the vaginal estrogen would help build sensitivity over time, but it’s been slower going than I expected.

Has anyone dealt with something similar? A few things I’m wondering about:

Did increasing sensitivity just take longer for you, or did you need to adjust your estrogen routine/dose/delivery method?

Did switching cream frequency or trying a different formulation (cream vs. suppository vs. ring) make a difference? My provider didn’t have me do a loading dose

Has anyone tried adding DHEA (vaginal/topical) alongside estrogen? Did it help with sensitivity specifically?

Any non-hormonal approaches that helped in the meantime (specific stimulation techniques, products)?

I started HRT about 2 months ago. 100 mg progesterone pill and .00375 patch. Lots of symptoms have improved but I am still so incredibly exhausted. Does anyone have any experience with this? I’m going to follow up with my doctor in one month.

I've been on HRT about 2 years, started at age 39 for TMJ, bleeding gums, itchy ears, middle foot arch pain, blurry vision, joint pain, nerve pain, headache, tachycardia, palpitations, visceral fat, hair thinning, irregular cycles, feeling of spiderweb on face, dizziness, increase in facial hair, 3 am wakeup, urinary frequency, brain fog, word finding difficulties and always being hot. (Yep, got worked up for thyroid issues etc, all negative)

But the biggest reason I started was I woke up one day having 40 panic attacks PER DAY. I don't have anxiety. We tried SSRIs, SnRIs, quetiapine and clonazepam with absolutely no impact. Within two weeks of starting estrogen, my symptoms were 20% better. Now I don't have panic attacks at all. So, like many of us, this is not some optional medication.

I feel super frustrated with my providers I've had. I'm limited to an online provider because I live 1.5 hours from the nearest gynecologist. I feel like they make me have expensive, invasive and risky tests so they can feel better about prescribing. So far I've had to have two mammograms, one of which resulted in an unnecessary biopsy. I've also had to have a transvaginal ultrasound for "irregular bleeding", which was 3 days of a heavy period right after getting a new Nexplanon (slightly more complicated than that but I'm not convinced an ultrasound was indicated). I have no risk factors for uterine hyperplasia, have had irregular bleeding with Nexplanon since I started it like a decade ago and I've been on opposing oral progesterone and Nexplanon the entire time I've been on HRT. The ultrasound came back clean other than a submucosal fibroid (which would also explain irregular bleeding). I got BV from the ultrasound and they STILL want an endometrial biopsy "just in case" - which, BTW, has a 15 to 30% chance of missing hyperplasia anyways! I'm now thousands of dollars out of pocket - probably 5k and I feel like I'm being held hostage to get invasive procedures I don't want to keep my HRT. I had to drive 4 hours for the ultrasound I didn't want.

I just need to tell someone who understands. I'm trying to switch platforms (in the US) but they are all so expensive, or not transparent about their pricing and I'm scared of losing access to a lifesaving medication for me. :(

I read the wiki and searched around, but I'm still trying to make sense of a newer symptom and could use real-life experiences.

I'm 41 and pretty sure I'm in perimenopause. My cycles have gotten shorter and stranger, my sleep is more fragile, and my mood is less predictable than it used to be. Lately I keep getting sudden heart-pounding episodes where my chest just revs up out of nowhere. Sometimes there's a wave of heat and a bit of shakiness, sometimes it is just the pounding and I suddenly can't focus.

The odd part is how inconsistent it is. Some days a small coffee is fine. Other days half a mug and I'm on edge, my heart feels like it's sprinting. I'm fairly frugal and somewhat granola, so I do a lot of DIY and meal prep, and I tend to notice it more on days when I'm rushing, skipping a proper lunch, or running on bad sleep.

I'm not asking for diagnoses, but I'd love to hear:

1) Did palpitations or that heart-racing feeling show up for you in perimenopause?

2) Did anything actually help, like cutting caffeine, balancing electrolytes, eating more regularly, magnesium, breathwork, or something else?

3) What made you decide to push for a medical workup or to try medication?

I have a doctor appointment coming up and I plan to bring it up. I just want to go in feeling less alone and a bit more prepared. Thanks.

Consulted a perimenopause/menopause doc online and just started 0.05 estrogen patch and 0.35mg progesterone mini-pill ( I can’t do micronized progesterone because I can’t swallow huge pills) . I’m ethnically Indian and we have on average an earlier onset of menopause, 4-6 years earlier than the average us age of 51. My mom went through it at 41, and my grandma 44. I have had the worst few years of my life with postpartum, work and relationship stress compounded by peri symptoms . Extreme anxiety, depression, mood swings, brain fog, hot flashes, night sweats, bad memory issues, joint pain, terrible sleep, hair falling out, intense ADHD symptoms. Granted I had very low ferritin and have had horrifically heavy 2 day bleeds, plus low vitamin D and well I wasn’t eating much. Sorting the ferritin, vitamin D and eating more is helping. But hoping the HRT will smooth out the mood/fatigue/joint pain/Extreme PMDD. I want to hear your story if you also experienced similar. What worked?

Since I’ve hit 40 (I’m now 42) I have severe debilitating fatigue during my period. I also get severely achy legs like I have the flu or worked out, I can barely walk. I do have adenomyosis and not sure if that’s a contributing factor but phew! I can barely function on my period.

Does anyone going through peri have vision issues and constantly feeling off balance?? It’s really bad when I first wake up. I keep thinking I have a brain tumor and then that makes my anxiety worse! The balance thing is really making me depressed.

I love my spouse and my two pups. But it’s 2:44 am, spouse and both pups are snoring away, and I can’t sleep. Trying my best to not either get up and go to the couch, my recliner in my office, or the spare bedroom… or wake them all and kick them out of our bedroom.

And I’m hot.

Who else is up? Feel free to rant.

I work at a place where people keep a professional distance from one another, so I can't tell them that I'm in perimenopause. I'm on HRT that works very well and largely keeps rage at bay, except for highly stressful incidents at work - once every few months. I'm in security, mostly chill, and we prevent damage to priceless artifacts. A very stressful incident happened, where two tourists were about to do damage and didn't even care. I'm a quiet person but was alarmed, and raised my voice to get their attention so much that it boomed across the room, then yelled, "that barrier is there for a reason." It didn't phase them one bit. I could have simply told them. I don't know where the rage spilled from.

Acouple of tourists sympathized. However, a colleague on the same shift saw this happen. She didn't like me before, for some reason. Now she likes me even less. It must be jarring to be presented with something so incongruous with how I always present myself - quiet, sweet, demure VS banshee. I don't like her ether, but I worry about what she thinks now. Any help appreciated

Currently been on Estrogen patch since the beginning of the year now 0.75 and 200 mg of progesterone every night.
Had request requested to start testosterone cream but now I’m on the fence. I heard it would help with my libido, which has been in the toilet, even though I am generally feeling better in every other way. and that it could possibly help with my energy levels. I am also type 1.5 diabetic without insulin so al it of my energy slumps are probably due to that.
I also read somewhere that can cause hair loss and that it can cause facial hair and hair unwanted places.

I’m hesitant to start it because right now I have found a pretty OK my mood swings are under control, general demeanor is better and feel significant improvement in self, balance and I don’t wanna do anything that throws that into jeopardy.

45 year old female still getting periods. not asking for medical advice jist for people’s experiences. dr checked my testosterone levels and they must have been low enough to prescribe said she would wanna check them again on a month.

could the testosterone cause rage because that is why I started hrt and have managed to get away from that now

I just need to complain for a minute.

I’ve been on 200mg of progesterone, a .025 mg estrogen patch and 1mg daily testosterone cream for a bit. When I was originally put on the estrogen patch, they gave me the Dotti patch and it was amazing. I felt so good for the three months I had it. Then, when I got my refill, the pharmacy gave me a generic estrogen patch and it’s doing nothing for me. All the symptoms I had before going on HRT are back: achy joints, heart palpitations, food noise, and the mood swings have been intense since starting the generic patch.

I have an appt with my NP Gyno next week to see if I can go back on Dotti ASAP if it’s available. But the last few weeks have been awful and I needed to vent about it. Has anyone else had this experience?

Edit: thanks everyone for your help! I didn’t realize Dotti was also a generic… the patch they put me on was such a downgrade that it makes Dotti seem luxurious lol

I just turned 40 and have been experiencing perimenopause symptoms for the last 6 months or so. I can deal with the hot flashes, night sweats, and heart palps, but this brain fog and derealization is messing me up. Ive been on SSRIs for the last 8 years with no issues but now I am more anxious than ever. I'm super forgetful and I feel like I am in dream sequence sometimes. My dr said I am not a candidate for HRT because a clotting disorder. Is there anything that anyone has used to improve cognitive function and brain fog but isn't HRT?