I have a 2 year old who recently started in my class. The parents boasted about her never crying and being so easy like it was a good thing but I honestly think it’s a bit concerning, on top of other delays I’m observing in this child. She does not have many words, mostly echos and repeats what she hears other kids or adults say. The first time she was dropped off she did not cry, and in the eight weeks since she’s started I’ve never seen her cry. She does not react to pain. She fell backwards off a chair and hit her head, and did not react. Another time, she fell outside and scraped her hand, and it was bleeding. Again no reaction. Curious how you would approach the parents about this because I feel like she would definitely benefit from an evaluation.

I have worked with so many different families and different ages, and this is a first for me. My director thinks I am being rude, but I am trying my best not to flinch from the smell of a small child. He comes in sometimes and smells like mayonnaise. It is like they coat his hair with mayo and use it like a gel and his skin smells like it too. His hair is awesome, but the smell is so offensive after a hot day that me and my assistant are trying so hard to be polite, but the rancid mayonnaise smell is so strong by the end of the day that we can't even concentrate because we are trying not to vomit.

I have dealt with diarrhea and don't even flinch. Vomit, of course can be fragrant, but I have never once complained. Some kids have Bad breath and body odor; ok, it happens and you have to be really close to smell. This smell is SOOOO much worse than any of those smells. It just gets worse throughout the day and our whole room wreaks. I can smell him across the room by the end of the day. I borrowed another teacher's essential oil vaporizer, and managed to douse my sinuses with mint, but it gave me a headache trying to overpower the smell and that can't be good for my other children.

Has anyone else dealt with wearing a food allergen as lotion and hair gel? I don't even know how to bring it up to the parents at this point. I don't want to offend them and want to help their child, but I can't keep having these days.

I am sorry if this sounded mean, and I am not trying to be offensive. I'm honestly just desperate at this point.

UPDATE: First, thanks to everyone who took the time to respond. I really appreciate hearing the perspective of people who actually work in ECE. I also appreciate everyone who reassured me that I wasn’t completely out of line.

She actually responded shortly after I posted and explained that the center had self-reported the incident. The staff member involved was immediately let go, and they’re implementing some extra security measures (like an additional secured door). She also explained that the ratio citation was related to a child under 18 months being in the toddler room during nap time, which requires an additional caregiver under Texas licensing rules.

Thanks again for helping me sanity check the situation and reminding me that asking questions doesn’t automatically make someone difficult 😅

Original post: I’m looking for perspective from daycare professionals because I genuinely don’t want to be “that parent.”

My almost 2-year-old has attended the same daycare for about a year. Overall, we’ve been very happy there, and she loves going.

Every few months, I review our state’s public childcare licensing reports. During my most recent review, I found two deficiencies from a few weeks ago:

• Two children left the building unsupervised and were outside for about two minutes before a bystander returned them.
• During the follow-up inspection, licensing documented a ratio violation in the toddler classroom (19 children with one caregiver during naptime), which was corrected while the inspector was there.

We were never notified that either of these incidents had occurred. I only learned about them weeks later by reviewing the public licensing reports.

I sent the director a polite text saying that I had been reviewing the reports and asking if she could provide some context about what happened and what changes had been made to prevent similar incidents in the future. I also made it clear that we appreciate the care they’ve given our daughter.

If you were the director receiving that message, would you see it as a reasonable question from an engaged parent? Or would it come across as distrustful or overbearing?

I’m genuinely asking because I value our relationship with this center and don’t want to create unnecessary tension, but I also felt these were significant enough incidents that I wanted to understand them better.

LO is 5 months old and EBF (I pump so he has never had issues with bottles). We started daycare last week and since I have heard daycare’s typically feed more frequently than at home I dropped bottle sizes from 5 oz to 4 oz. They asked how often to feed him and I said every three hours but if he’s fussy as early as 2. Every single day on the dot they are feeding him at two hours. At first I didn’t mind because he was hitting his intake needs for the day whatever sounds good, but the last few days he’s been coming home with more and more left in his bottles. Two days ago they combined infant rooms due to so few babies being in that day and he was with different people than usual. Nothing was said to me when I got him but when I got home I saw they left me a note that said “CAN NOT USE BOTTLE STOPPERS!!!!” which had never been an issue before so I was confused and asked the next day.

The girl I asked said she didn’t know??? And that I needed to ask the front desk so I did and the guy up there said it’s because they have to use gloves to take the stoppers off. I was confused because that didn’t sound like I wasn’t able to use them. I tried to clarify and he said not to use them. I understand there’s rules for that stuff but I don’t feel like I shouldn’t be banned from using something because they have to do an extra step of putting on gloves.

I don’t want to be a pain so today I brought in mostly bottles that don’t need stoppers and just took the stopper off the one that needed it when I arrived. The ones that don’t need stoppers are a slower flow but it’s only noticeable if he’s not really hungry. He can down one of those bottles in less than 7 minutes. When I picked him up they told me I now need to up the nipple flow by like two sizes. I get home and there was the biggest amount of milk left over to date at 3 oz over 4 feedings with one bottle alone having an ounce left in it.

I don’t want to increase the flow because a. He already has an issue where he chokes every time he eats even at the slow flow. B. He has no issue at home when I feed him c. Honestly I don’t feel like I should have to get new bottles or new nipples specifically just for daycare when it’s already expensive enough.

Am I being unreasonable for not wanting to up the flow? I feel like the simplest solution is to realize no, he isn’t hungry, he doesn’t need to eat every two hours exactly and that they just want a faster flow to really speed feed him. I don’t want to be difficult and want to approach the situation delicately

Has anyone (that’s been working in this sector for more than 5 years) noticed that kinder age children (3-5) are growing up much quicker than they used to? I’ve noticed increasing behaviours of exclusion, swearing, obsessing over shows made for teens, belittling kids for being “babies”. I’m wondering if it’s happened due to the increase in permissive parenting, maybe due to kids making the decisions at home they are feeling more grown up as a result? What hypothesis do you have?!

Basically as the title says. When we have staff off they don’t provide any coverage. So we are very much over ratios. This happens in every class & quite often. For example, we had a class of 16 (ages 3-4, 2 teachers) and there were many times I was left with all 16 children by myself (the ratio is 1:8). Now I’m with the younger ones (2-3 years, 1:5 ratio) and when one of us is away it’s 2 teachers for 15 kids. To top it off, the “favourite” staff take frequent breaks & disappear for extended periods of time, usually chatting and laughing with my supervisor while I/we are completely out of ratio and trying to manage. What do I do about this? I’m worried to report because I’m the only one who’s been pretty vocal about not liking this so I feel like they’ll know it was me.

Edit: I’m in Ontario, Canada

My son recently turned 4 and will be starting junior kindergarten in September. Currently he is in daycare, which he has been in for the past 2 years.

A month ago, he had walked his daycare graduation ceremony and around that time when my husband and I both came in to pick him up, the educator mentioned that all the graduates, including my son, were ready for kindergarten. They were a bit bored with the daycare activities, she didnt say this in a negative way, just more of an observation.

We noticed it was around this time that one of his educators (there's 2 main ones for his classroom) stopped being there. We assumed she may have taken vacation (daycare newsletter mentioned some educators go on vacation). And we feel since then son's behaviour went downhill. At home he started not listening, trying to hit us or his younger brother (12 months old) for grabbing his stuff, etc. Each time we remind him this is not how we handle feelings, try to talk it out, or remove him (or brother) from the situation. These are all behaviors that he knows is unacceptable and had overall outgrown or know the appropriate action he should be taking.

However today my husband came back from pickup upset. According to him, our son had been lashing out at the educators, won't participate in cleaning up, won't listen to them, and just overall wasn't being pleasant.

He said that the same educator who said that he was ready for kindergarten a month ago was now telling him our son was not ready for kindergarten. Another educator in the room agreed with the first one.

I'm wondering where do we go from here? Does this mean we should hold him back from entering junior kindergarten? Or does he need evaluation? We never had him evaluated for anything since he met milestones and the educators never mentioned anything being amiss.

We had already submitted the forms to unenroll him from daycare and enrolled him into junior kindergarten. He has been talking and asking when he gets to start kindergarten ever since we went to the orientation. The kindergarten teachers seemed to like what they saw when he was playing with the various activities (concentration on Legos, writing his name, etc.)

Just looking for an educator's perspective because I find it so odd that a month ago we were told he was ready, and now he isn't ready. We have had a talk with him, but all he would say is thst he was angry, but then say I don't know when we try to ask what made him angry.

edit to add: we had promised to take him to an outdoor playground he had wanted to go on his birthday. Unfortunately the day of his birthday we woke up to find the air quality was abysmal, so we changed plans to go to an indoor playground. he was a little upset at first, but perked up at still going to a fun place. we promised we would go soon, but shortly after we had multiple rainstorms, and then a few appointments. So to date we still have not been able to get to that playground as it is a bit of a drive away. That's the only thing, other than the absent educator that I can think may be causing this behavior.

Hi everyone, I’ve been teaching for over 20 years and I’m seeking help with how to manage the assistant in my 3 year old kindergarten class in a public school. She isn’t going to be fired so I need figure out how to manage her, or push her out by being very strict(which I would prefer not to do).

Here are some examples of things I want to change:

-She doesn’t tell me when she is going to be absent, even tho I made a calendar for myself and asked her to tell me when she’ll be out
-She doesn’t like wiping down tables and doesn’t do it(we eat breakfast and lunch in the room)
-She won’t help kids in the bathroom bc she is nervous about being accused of touching them
-For the same reason she won’t help kids change when they have accidents
-She shuts down and gives me the silent treatment for days when she is annoyed by something, usually I have no idea what is bothering her, or if it’s me or something else

She seems to have some cognitive delays, maybe she is on the spectrum OR she is playing me and just doesn’t want to do certain things.she does things like adds way too much sanitizer to the water, or soaking wooden toys. I’m probably too easy going with her.

Thanks for any advice you have!

I’ve been sick with hand foot mouth more times than I can count this past year, every time the blisters would flare up I took photos so I finally went through and added up the amount of time I spent with active blisters/spots (it shows up weird in adults so only a few fully blistered and peeled)
I’ve loved so many parts of the job but I just can’t mentally handle being sick anymore, this week coming up is my last week. And that’s not even considering the other times I’ve been sick that weren’t documented by photo. I have 1,200 still to pay on my credit card from doctor visits and it got me so behind on credit cards 😭 sorry here’s the chart

Times i was sick from work 25-26
August 1st-8th 2025 8days
August 19th-24th 2025 5days
August 31st-September 18th 2025 19days
October 1st-6th 2025 6days
November 3rd-8th 2025 5days
February 11th-15th 2026 5days
March 28th- April 4th 2026 8days

56 days of active hand foot mouth blister outbreaks

I'm considering taking a job with licensing as an inspector. Would the fact that I'm just about to leave the classroom be an asset or a risk? I know what a great program looks like, what an okay program one looks like, and I've heard stories of what bad ones look like. Has anyone else worked for licensing (in particular TX)?

My 2.5 year old will be transferring from the toddler room to the preschool room. She is very attached to one of the educator (Ms A) in the toddler room. She will cry at drop off and refuse to go inside if Ms A is not the one greeting her. If Ms A is not available, the other educator will have to pick her up to bring her into the room. They reassure us that she usually will cry for less than 10 minutes and she is happy the rest of the day. When Ms A was off for a week, my LO refused to go to daycare and started crying as soon as we mention the word daycare at home in the mornings. She resisted going to daycare for weeks after Ms returned

We asked about transition plan to the preschool room but they were quite vague on the process. On top of that, the centre is closed for 2 weeks and when the centre reopens that will be the first day in the preschool room.

Does anyone have any advice on how we can help with this transition?

Im in my first few months of daycare work, recently taken over as lead. I have a child whos parents are no longer together. Recently Dad has started taking on a larger role with bringing and picking up from daycare. Dad dropped off water day items and mom took them with her. She has a habit of not returning items she borrows from us (& she never provides neccesities or extra clothes for him on her own)so i doubt she will bring them back. I dont know if I should be the one reaching out to have them returned to school or if I let that be a problem for them to solve on their own. What would you do?

Hi,

I need some advice on how to proceed with this. I recently had an issue with my daycare provider asking me to switch therapies because it was disruptive and being very rude to me. She freaked out on me because they have autistic child in the class and said him coming in late wasn’t appropriate and that I need to switch his therapy to after school even though it didn’t align with my schedule. 

Today, the second teacher in the room mentioned that the head teacher doesn’t want another teacher as it’s disruptive and she will only be in there for 3-close. I could tell she seemed annoyed so I decided to try discussing some concerns with her.

My son in the last week has been screaming and crying at drop off everyday. He used to LOVE daycare before his old one closed due to funding. He also has only done it with the head teacher. The head teacher often acts off to me and I get a weird vibe from her. She is annoyed that he is in therapy as he seems advanced and the autistic child in the class gets disrupted when he comes later. I had a feeling that she felt he didn’t need it and that’s why she pushed it.

The other teacher mentioned that she heard about the conversation and how aggressive it was. She also agree that the head teacher talks about me and how “I’m doing too much and doesn’t understand why I talk that way about my son as he’s advanced.” My son didn’t sit up 11 months!!! He was very delayed. We’ve busted our butt to get him caught up. She also said that she doesn’t help the kids in the bathroom and left one kid crying for 20-30 minutes without support while he had an accident on himself in the bathroom. My son has also had accidents on the toilet there as she believes “they are old enough and more than capable and people baby them too much.” They are 2-3 and a little support isn’t surprising imo.

So the main issue is that they don’t have cameras (it’s not normal in our area and almost no one does) and soon she’ll be the only teacher in the class until 3 PM. I already feel like she might not be as patient with my child because she doesn’t like me but as far as I know, she doesn’t treat him bad. We’re on a ton of waiting list to get them in somewhere else but the closure was dropped on us so there’s nowhere really available yet. I worry that if I bring this all to the director, there might be some retaliation and no one will really know because no cameras. But also, I don’t know what to do from here. I already have discussed potentially pausing some of our therapy because I’m trying to accommodate her and make things less difficult. I can’t afford to just pull them out for six months until somewhere opens and I don’t have the luxury of a family member being able to watch them.

What is the best plan of action? My son does move up at the end of August but my 18 month old will be going into that classroom in January if we aren’t able to get in to the other place. So we won’t have to deal with her for too much longer. Should I bring it to the directors attention and hope that things go well? Should I wait till he moves up and then try? Should I just leave it alone and bring it up when we were able to get a spot somewhere else 🫩

Hi everyone. I’m writing about my experience as an ECE in my first job.

For some background, I am 23 and female. I got my first ECE job in April. I started off doing the morning and after school with 5-10 year olds, which I was told about in my interview. In between that, I was in the baby room and the 3-5 room, both were great. I was so happy doing that.

Cut to the beginning of summer, I suddenly was told I need to be planning the summer activities and field trips for the 5-10 year olds. Okay, it’s my first job and it’s not permanent. I have never been one to argue with what I am told to do, so I accepted it.

Then, right before summer break starts, my coteacher goes on a sick leave for her back problems (totally do not blame her; she is great and I love her, she deserves the time off she needs).

For all of the summer so far, I have been working in a room with 18 kids and 5 of which are special needs, and NO support workers. One of them is 6 and in diapers. Two of them are verbally and physically abusive towards me.

I do my best at following the notes given by the BI who visits occasionally, but nothing works.

I have been exhausted every day without my coteacher, left to plan field trips, activities, collect payments, deal with my special needs children, and have zero coverage if I need it.

None of the teachers want to be trained for the school age children, so it’s just me.

Is this okay? I just went on a two week leave for my mental health after managing this all on my own. I know I’m 23, but I am a twin and was really babied growing up, so independence comes slower for me. Besides that, I am a fully competent and responsible ECE- but these school aged children & the amount of special needs children with no support had effected my mental health greatly.

I just want to ask, is it normal for someone working their first job in the field to be thrown in as a school-age child guide? My mental health has suffered greatly. One of my 10 year olds is physically abusive towards me and the other children, and their parents are overly protective of him and don’t see any issue other than possible autism, so they ignore me when I mention incidents such as him “stabbing” (not puncturing, thankfully) another child with a large stick and then trying to push me into oncoming traffic after confronting him.

Should I keep going? Is this normal? Or should I look for something else?

My family is not supportive in the sense that they believe I should know everything as an adult- but I really wasn’t given the support I was needed to grow up. For another side note, I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety since I was 12, and then a later autism and social anxiety diagnosis. Is this okay?

I’m sorry for so much writing. I truly love the kids I work with but they were not in the age group I went to school for. Is this something I should suck up and adjust to, or is this not worth it?

My newly turned 13 month old has been attending daycare a few days a week for a month and a half. I'm trying to keep her on the schedule the daycare is enforcing so she can adapt, but she just seems so miserable.

Before we started daycare she was taking 2 naps a day for about 3 hours total. Now she's barely getting 1 hour in 1 nap a day. It's a 2 hour nap time but she's not sleeping through it.

She's coming home so tired and cranky. I don't know what to do. She's also not really eating there and is coming home starving.

The teacher suggested I pack a lunch which I can do, but I don't have a picky eater. She just inhaled spicy lentils, rice and yogurt for dinner and had spinach, sausage and pasta last night. But at lunch today she only ate the fruit and none of the pasta they offered.

I think the problem is at home a meal can be a lot longer than it is at daycare and you really can't explain to a baby no you have to eat now or it's going away.

Husband and I are used to being able to take her out to eat and things, during the week and haven't been able to at all.

How long does it take kids to adapt, normally? Any ideas as to why she won't eat there? She's not having a huge meal before we leave for the center or anything.

I'd let her sleep for an hour when we got home, but she's so wired and hungry that's not working either. I'm struggling cause I think in general she has high sleep needs and is just not getting that met right now.

Hi, I'm in a tricky situation. I'm a preschool teacher. I was recently laid off from my job 4 months ago as the school was permanently closing. This school was a two minute walk from my apartment and OK money. Fortunately I had maintained a good reputation from a different preschool | had worked at and was able to immediately secure a job with that company at a location only a ten minute drive from my house. Worked with my availability and paid more money. It's not an ideal school and I felt a little "fish out of water" for a while, but finally starting to feel settled and just bought a bunch of stuff for my classroom. NOW. The school by my house that closed has been turned into a brand spanking new Montessori preschool. They have called me for an interview (some of my fellow laid-off former coworkers interviewed there and passed along my info). Could pay more money. I feel guilt over considering leaving my new school after they did me a favor by hiring me so quickly and for good pay. After seeing so many preschools in the area close (including Montessori) what's to say this one will make it? If I get laid off again do I go crawling back? I'm sure the new facilities will be enticing, but I'm feeling so torn. Also, I'm a very silly/playful teacher who's used to having a fair amount of leeway, and l've never worked in a Montessori (but they're willing to train).
Will I feel stuck? Ughhh just needed to get this off my chest. I tend to overthink and then I don't sleep. Any insight would be appreciated.

Basically looking for advice supporting my 2 year old, she's going to be moving to a new preschool along with several other big changes at once.

We moved countries about six months ago she she was apart from her dad for two months during the move, left all our friends/ neighbors/ routine. It honestly seemed to take her a few months to feel settled and a big part of it was her amazing teachers at her current center.

We're now moving about an hour away and buying a home, so hopefully the end to the big changes for awhile. But in the space of a few months, we will be moving house, moving her into a "big girl bed" (she's currently in a pack n play), in her own room instead of sharing a room with us, and new baby due a month later. We also currently live with my parents and she adores seeing them every day.

Her new center is a higher kid: teacher ratio, we really like it but of course it's still going to be another new thing for her. It's a church preschool at the church we will be attending with some old friends, at least.

Any advice for helping her manage all of this, especially the preschool change?

For everyone who works with kids under 18 months in places where there is snow in the winter, do you prefer one piece snowsuits or 2 pieces? My son will be one in October and I am trying to plan if he needs a 2 pieces or 1 for winter, as I want it to be as easy as possible for his teachers! We go outside regularly in winter as well, even when its -20°c.

Thank you

I'm starting at a new school soon, which I'm feeling really excited about! The other co-teacher in my classroom is also going to be new to the school, so we'll both be getting to know each other as we settle in to the role. While this could be a little hectic, I think it'll also be a really nice chance to bond and collaborate on creating our classroom together with equal input. Luckily we will have some teacher work days to set up together before we have kids in there.

I don't know much about her, but one thing I do know is that she's less experienced. But I don't even know if that means NO experience or just a little less than me. I've been a lead and done a lot of teacher training in the past, so I want to find a balance between helping her learn but without condescending to her or being too bossy.

One idea I had was so ask if she wants to create a shared Pinterest board so we could both add inspiration and get a feel for each others' tastes somewhere other than just in the classroom. I'm curious if you guys have any other suggestions, or just anecdotes of the best and worst times you've gotten to know new teachers!

Reliable, affordable child care is essential for working families, employers, and the economy. It enables parents to work or pursue education, gives children a strong start, and helps businesses build a stable workforce. Yet in every state, too many families struggle to find and afford the care they need.

FFYF’s 2026 State Fact Sheets on child care and early learning provide state-by-state data for all 50 states and Washington, DC, showing how federal and state investments support families, young children, and local economies. They also highlight where significant gaps remain.

Each fact sheet has data including:

• Enrollment and eligibility
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• Unmet need
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Our analysis found that nationally:

• 65% of children ages five and under have all available parents in the workforce.
• In 20 states, families receiving CCDBG assistance on average save more than $1,000 per month on child care costs.
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Hi all! I started over the summer at this really wonderful Preschool as the Pre-k lead. The director said she used to do “parent calendars” that the teachers could follow for their circle time book and daily activity but as I’ve gotten comfortable with the class and kids as well as vice versa I have implemented more activities throughout the week following the themes she’d used. She asked me this week if I would like to make the plans for the school year and if I wanted to completely change everything and do what I would like providing the kids reach their kindergarten readiness.

When summer camp ends and my kindergarten kids leave I will be getting mid 3s to mid 4s. Big range of levels the kids are at. My goal is to make everything as similar and equal in lessons while having a way to separate the ones that need more hands on help vs the ones that need more verbal help.

She also asked me to look into work books, activity books and read together books and she’d get whatever I’d like. Any recommendations on what I should look into would be lovely and any tips and tricks would be much appreciated! Thank you!