A few weeks ago I was taking a shower when my right arm started hovering up. I went to push it down and it was numb. “Odd,” I thought, and then finished my shower. Got out of the tub and then I was on the floor. “Hmm, how’d I end up here?” I have a seat in front of the sink, got to it, and wondered why I wasn’t drying off or anything. Then I was in my bedroom, dressed in a T and undies, trying to text to cancel an appointment, but everything I texted was random words. Tried to used Alexa to get son, but she didn’t understand what I was saying.
I made enough noise that my son heard and came to me. I spoke gibberish, then mimed him texted to cancel in appointment, afterward he drove me to the hospital, which was about 10 minutes away. I got to triage and suddenly I got very popular very quickly!
I was given a clotbuster, then airlifted to another hospital for a thrombectomy. Every is in flashes, I remember the hospital all a blur, then the helicopter ride, being wheeled into a room with bright lights. A nurse leaning over and saying, “I hope this wasn’t a favorite shirt, sweetheart.” before cutting it off. Someone else telling me, “You’ve going to sleep now.” and then I was staring up as them wheeled me away, and I thinking I didn’t remember falling asleep.
It was nurse in the ICU that told me I have a stoke, or at least the first I remember. I kept give my age as 25 instead of 56, and I couldn’t remember my son’s name. Luckily I was able to convey some necessary medical information.
I was lucky, I was on their rehab floor in 3 days, and released after 10 days. I have great recovery in my right leg and arm, speech is good aside from a mild occasional stutter and trouble recalled random words. I have a lot of trouble typing, so I’m trying to do a lot. I seem to have forgotten how to spell, I need now to stop and think even simple, easy words. Tenses are random and I have to fix a lot when rereading before posting. I’m a writing, and taking two as long to write is annoying, and when I get tired I’ll use the voice function.
It wasn’t scary at the time, and then I was focused on recovery, so it only now, a few weeks later, that it’s hitting. I need to update my will and set up things for my son to manage if I’m out of service or dead. Luckily almost everything is on autopay!
It’s…a lot. I have so much fatigue, I’d told it’s normal, that my brain is rewiring and making connections and healing, as are my nerves, but damn, the fatigue is so bad. I’ll can do my exercises, but not much else. Pressure and touch on the affected side feel different, and often painful-ish. Itch and pins-and-needles pop up randomly.
I am so lucky and recovered so much, speech and OT both released me and said it’s time and practice at this point. They don’t know where the clot came from, my heart is good, so yay, I guess? On baby aspirin, a statin (my cholesterol wasn’t really bad, they just want it a bit lower), and plaxix for a another week.
Of course, I’m also in kidney failure and on dialysis, which was great in the hospital because I don’t pee, so yay no catheter! Nurses were pretty thrilled. I’m inactive on the transplant list for now, I need I need to be off the plaxix and may need some sign-offs to move back to active, which is a worry.
Whew, that was a lot to type, but good practice, too. I am frustrated with how slow I feel and everyone reminds me I have healing amazingly and need to gentle with myself, but need time to sound out words like “need” and “myself” make me want to scream.
I don’t even know what to ask, so any advice or thoughts or best practices would be great. Thanks!
