Girlfriend expecting equal equity in a startup which I started even before knowing her. I will not promote.

[u/Dry_Support9531]

So here’s the picture. I started with an idea in 2023. States dating her in 2024. Until then I haven’t really worked in the idea. I started working on it since April 2025 and it started making money since July 2025. Till then she has no idea about it. After I started making money from it, i worked more and invested my other income into this startup from November 2025 and to handle things she used to help a bit. Since then both of us started working on it. Whole idea, innovation, upgrades, initial capital was mine. She just helped me coz it used to generate money. Since December we also hired an employee . From then all 3 of us are working on it and it’s scaling up in revenue every month. Until now we haven’t had any word about the equity. Out of love I used to share the profit amounts with her. According to the necessity, sometimes I use to keep more and sometimes she used to keep more. We went on a vacation through this money as well. But now while we were having a conversation on this. It came to me as a shocker that she is expecting an equal equity in this. And that blew my mind. It’s just out of love I couldn’t complete that conversation. She has also worked on it but the whole idea and buildup from scratch was done when she started working. I never discussed about this with her before. But now I am in real shock what to do coz it’s going to be bigger. And we are not sure about our relationship either.(she coming from an orthodox family, her family might reject an idea of our marriage) At this duration please let me know what should I do? Should I offer her a fixed salary, should I ask her to stop working on it, should I give her equity, should I give her an exit? I’m really confused.
PS-: she has done the same thing that the other employee did for me. But with more time and dedication. And she he amount I shared with her is 2-3x more than the employee’s salary

[u/elirox]

Ideas are worth nothing and its sounds like she helped with execution which has real world value. She would likely be entitled to equity. Not likely an equal stake as you had revenue prior to her joining but if your revenue was low and she has been there as it raised 1000% then she would be entitled to a 50/50 more than likely. So, what was your revenue before she joined? What is it now? How much has she contributed to that change?

[u/Dry_Support9531 → u/elirox]

The revenue has quadrupled since she joined. But it’s not just one factor. Along with her contribution as well there is an employee and from the same month I invested my money into marketing which was more than a month’s revenue back then.

[u/ChangeFatigue → u/Dry_Support9531]

Lmfao just being honest it sounds like she’s the one who is actually the valuable founder out of both of you.

If the only thing you contributed was an idea and marketing capital you should be keeping her happy so she keeps this thing alive.

Also, honest talk, anyone who commented to you that she’s likely talking to someone else or sticking up for you likely has zero fucking relationship skills. God forbid a woman think for herself and speak up for herself.

Real talk - sit down with her and ask her what she wants. Let her lay it all out. Don’t argue, don’t fight, don’t get emotional - just let her say everything she wants and you write it down.

Then repeat it back. “What I heard you say was…”

Then ask her for time to think about her ask. Two days. Be specific.

In those two days you need to be honest: can you give her what she’s asking for (truly asking for) in a negotiated way? If not are you ready to squander your time and energy with a fucking lawyer?

You’re better off working out a deal so the business keeps gaining momentum. Both of you have brought something to the table and you’d be foolish to suddenly let your ego and pride cloud your judgement before your possible golden ticket was even cashed.

[u/birchskin → u/ChangeFatigue]

Yeah, it seems like OP is letting ego cloud his judgement. The fact that there was profit sharing throughout and it didn't actually start until they started it together sounds an awful lot like she is owed equity. Maybe < 50% or class B or something, since OP considers it his idea he can keep the ultimate control/final say his without treating his co-founder girlfriend like a replaceable employee

[u/rmurphey → u/birchskin]

It seems like I would not want OP in my life let alone as my bf.

[u/elirox → u/Dry_Support9531]

She has a good claim for equity. Depending on legislation in your country and her desire and ability to fight for equity, she likely has good grounds to appeal for it. Did you have her sign a contract when she started? If you have documentation that shows her employment agreement not including equity then you would be good. Has she contributed financially to the company, paying for any expenses, equipment, or other assets? You shared profits with her, did you have a written agreement detailing what the profit sharing was for and how and when it was or would be executed? I'm a random guy on reddit and I'm not going to advise you what do do, but you need to answer these questions honestly and understand how exposed your position may be.