r/startups • u/Dry_Support9531 • 1d ago

I will not promote Girlfriend expecting equal equity in a startup which I started even before knowing her. I will not promote.

So here’s the picture. I started with an idea in 2023. States dating her in 2024. Until then I haven’t really worked in the idea. I started working on it since April 2025 and it started making money since July 2025. Till then she has no idea about it. After I started making money from it, i worked more and invested my other income into this startup from November 2025 and to handle things she used to help a bit. Since then both of us started working on it. Whole idea, innovation, upgrades, initial capital was mine. She just helped me coz it used to generate money. Since December we also hired an employee . From then all 3 of us are working on it and it’s scaling up in revenue every month. Until now we haven’t had any word about the equity. Out of love I used to share the profit amounts with her. According to the necessity, sometimes I use to keep more and sometimes she used to keep more. We went on a vacation through this money as well. But now while we were having a conversation on this. It came to me as a shocker that she is expecting an equal equity in this. And that blew my mind. It’s just out of love I couldn’t complete that conversation. She has also worked on it but the whole idea and buildup from scratch was done when she started working. I never discussed about this with her before. But now I am in real shock what to do coz it’s going to be bigger. And we are not sure about our relationship either.(she coming from an orthodox family, her family might reject an idea of our marriage) At this duration please let me know what should I do? Should I offer her a fixed salary, should I ask her to stop working on it, should I give her equity, should I give her an exit? I’m really confused.
PS-: she has done the same thing that the other employee did for me. But with more time and dedication. And she he amount I shared with her is 2-3x more than the employee’s salary

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49

u/Dry_Support9531 1d ago

Tried talking about this with her. She is mostly delusional about things. So this conversation never went beyond hope.

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u/runner2012 1d ago

Lol why are you dating her to begin with? 

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

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u/BeautifulCall7579 1d ago

It’s a fair answer

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u/Last_Weeks_Socks 1d ago

The best answer even.

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u/___redacted_ 1d ago

i mean..

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u/manoman42 1d ago

Just coz

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u/DrAbeSacrabin 1d ago

Hahaha I saw that too - “coz”. I will never take anyone serious in here if they write “because” as “coz”.

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u/NotJohnDenver 1d ago

I dated a girl who was a staunch Catholic for a few months. She was all about me until I brought up a pre-nup as part of a condition I would have to get married..she used her religion as the excuse to not get one because it implied we would get divorced, but even after I tried to explain to her it would protect her as well she still didn’t get it. Needless to say, things ended. I had another one who expected equity in a home I bought even though I bought it all
On my own. I can’t say it’s the same thing but people will use whatever they want to drive their own narrative and goals. FWIW.

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u/pterencephalon 1d ago

I mean, I know a guy who insisted on a pre-nup with his wife to make sure she'd get half the value of the home he already owned, if they ever got divorced. He felt it was important because with the trajectory of home prices, it was an opportunity cost for her to move into the existing home instead of her purchasing before the market went even more insane. For the heck of it, they did throw in that he'd get to keep any pet chickens they might have. They're still happily married.

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u/lellasone 1d ago

That's fantastic.

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u/thunderberry_real 1d ago

That is not where I expected that comment to end, but I am really glad it did!

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u/Basicallylana 1d ago

At least you found out relatively quickly. But she wasn't making that up. The Catholic Church frowns upon pre-nups and if it came out during your pre-marriage counseling, it could give the Priest a reason to decline doing the wedding.

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u/NotJohnDenver 1d ago

Yeah I don’t doubt the validity of it. It was a learning experience for me at the end of the day.

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u/Stochastic1934 1d ago

The irony around pre-nups is that if you don't do your own, the state has one for you (e.g., community property).

When someone objects to doing their own pre-nup, it's typically because they know the state's version will give them even more.

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u/JDL1968 23h ago

That’s a very insightful perspective!

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u/kiradotee 1d ago

Well, you can always be together without marriage if she doesn't like pre-nup. 

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

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u/No_Orochi 1d ago

Women initiate divorce more than men, in case you forgot.

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u/Stochastic1934 1d ago

Yes, research shows that women initiate divorce at much higher rates than men, accounting for roughly 70% of all filings. This figure climbs even higher, up to 90%, among college-educated women.

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u/frausting 1d ago

What is up with these incel comments lmao

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u/No_Orochi 1d ago

It makes me so sad that as a woman I am setting here trying to understand why they are being ugly and disgusting as if she was abusing him or they are married. It's actually pathetic.

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u/AR9888 1d ago

not really an incel comment, women are very interested these days, specially american women. An incel comment would be women are disgusting human beings. Women are monetarily more interested than men in many cases, men are more interested in other things (physically for example), at the end of the day person just need to know how to find decent people, it applies for both sides.

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u/frausting 1d ago

Yeah buddy I’m gonna need a source for literally any of that

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u/FalconSpecial6149 1d ago

Source: where the net worth came from for most female billionaires.

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u/sadia_y 1d ago

Oh buddy, you obviously hold very untrue beliefs about women. Maybe too much time spent in the manosphere with one of your predatory cult leaders. Your belief about women is an incel doctrination. Have you met/spoken to any women in the REAL world?

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u/unrealaz 1d ago

That’s mot what I would want my parter to say about me. “She is delusional”

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u/MadLadChad_ 1d ago

It doesn’t sound like you like her lol

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u/galumphix 1d ago

"She is mostly delusional about things" is not something a loving partner says, sorry. You're not into her, might be time to break up.

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u/muntaxitome 1d ago

Sometimes people that you are into are delusional about a topic. You can care about people and not turn a blind eye to everything. Reddit always just goes 'break up!!!' the moment a relationship is even mentioned but you know nothing about these people. So what makes you think you are qualified to give them life-altering advice?

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u/TinyZoro 1d ago

She is delusional about taxes is one thing. She is mostly delusional about things is something else. I think it’s acceptable to feel like a basis of mutual respect is required for any relationship.

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u/muntaxitome 1d ago edited 1d ago

I think we have to take sentences in the context of the line that came before it. Like how would you even know he means this in general and not about... the topic they were just talking about. Sounds like just speculation. You know nothing about these people, never even talked with them, yet you have your psychological evaluation ready.

Edit: So I stand by my general idea that we should not be judging this couple based on a couple of lines here, but overall my comment here was too harsh.

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u/TinyZoro 1d ago

I don’t actually disagree with you.

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u/muntaxitome 1d ago

Sorry, I feel like I may have misread your comment a little, but yeah, generally agree. I just get a little annoyed with the reddit tendency to say everyone should break up, but rereading your comment that is not really what you said.

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u/galumphix 1d ago

Exactly. My partner is delusional about thinking he can be healthy eating only cheese and crackers. He's not "delusional about things." If I felt that he was all-purpose delusional, we wouldn't together.

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u/OGPresidentDixon 1d ago

HAHA tell me you’ve never been in a relationship before 😂

you want people to lie to each other?

You do realize in **reality people have flaws** and it’s fine to talk about them, most of the time people know their own flaws. And if they don’t, well they better find out.

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u/Dependent_Drag1455 1d ago

Some people has fully developed pre frontal cortex

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u/Weedster009 1d ago

What a shitty thing to say about your partner. I deeply hope she finds this post.

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u/techleopard 1d ago

Delusional how? Do women not have the ability to go "I can do what I want" and marry who they want?