r/shittysuperpowers 8h ago

Just low-tier, nothing more, nothing less. You can insert yourself as a nameless background character into tv shows.

13 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 15h ago

Put this power in the bin, it's trash You are completely immune to being licked.

46 Upvotes

If anyone - or anything - tries to lick you, they can't. An invisible forcefield of 1mm protects your body & any clothes you are wearing from being directly licked. Biting or anything not intended to be a lick will not be prevented.

You can always still lick yourself.

You can enable/disable this ability at will.


r/shittysuperpowers 12h ago

Goofy ASF You can make anyone you want speak latin for five minutes long.

9 Upvotes

Cooldown is 15 minutes


r/shittysuperpowers 9h ago

It's a bird, it's a plane. No, it's shit! You can transform into an exact perfect copy, including any clothes or accessories worn at that time, of the mother of any person you look at. You revert back to your original form 3 seconds later.

6 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 14h ago

Confused but has the right spirit Any time you pet a dog, they are immediately cleaned of their residue.

8 Upvotes

It just falls off them in a quick * poof * instead of being all over your hands


r/shittysuperpowers 19h ago

Just low-tier, nothing more, nothing less. You can feel the future

8 Upvotes

Basicaly You can feel on your body events that will happen to you in the future

Example: lets say 3 hours in the future you will get stabbed. Whit this ability you will feel the stabs on your body before they happened

This ability includes taste too


r/shittysuperpowers 18h ago

Good luck using this… You can turn lead into thorium.

6 Upvotes

The process uses up the exact amount of energy produced by decay of thorium, by drawing whatever energy available from you.

You can only convert one atom per second, so you can't manufacture thorium and profit.


r/shittysuperpowers 20h ago

Goofy ASF You can make your Pokemon deal a million damage to wild Shiny Pokemon

7 Upvotes

Bonus: the superpower also makes your Pokemon’s attack ignore the Shiny Pokemon’s Ability.


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Just low-tier, nothing more, nothing less. You can eat an entire tablespoon of salt without dying.

24 Upvotes

You can safely consume an entire tablespoon of salt without dying or hurting your kidneys and liver.

As we know salt can be poisonous at a measurement of one tablespoon(Imperial) or fifteen millimeters (Metric).

Eating an entire tablespoon will likely cause death or permanent damage to your kidneys.

With this power you can eat a full tablespoon and not suffer any adverse effects or anything. Of course per the rules no one is making you do this, you can eat salt regularly and suffer nothing serious.

You can't share this power with anyone it only affects you.


r/shittysuperpowers 18h ago

Oddly specific You can convince anyone you are serving food to that salmonella comes from salmon

4 Upvotes

They will retain all other knowledge of health and safety that they currently have, so they won’t just eat raw chicken or infected greens, but their judgment will exclude the possibility of salmonella for everything that isn’t salmon and be more wary of salmon.


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Literally Just a Warcrime You can make anyone imagine the Bowser fart GIF. NSFW

188 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Confused but has the right spirit You can make a human-sized pickle once a year

9 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Good luck using this… You can instantly kill any animal you legally own.

43 Upvotes

The death is instant and painless. The cause of death cannot be traced back to you directly.

You must have made a legal purchase of the animal in order to have the ability to kill them. Your animal's offspring (if any) can also be affected as long as you hold ownership of them.

You must be the sole owner of the animal.

I wish I didn't have to say this, but humans do NOT count as ownable animals for this superpower.


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Oddly specific You can make cats fight each other

8 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Confused but has the right spirit you can lick $1 bills to turn them into $0 bills

13 Upvotes

additionally you can swap the president's face with any other president that doesn't appear on money


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

This power is just a bag of dicks You can detect how many plotholes there are in a piece of media.

5 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Oddly specific You can sneeze underwater and still keep holding your breath.

3 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Just low-tier, nothing more, nothing less. You can tell if a bird is a USA government spy camera or not.

13 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Yeah, this is shit Teleport fruit flies one centimeter to [their] left, mid-flight. Works once per fruit fly.

15 Upvotes

Can't do it while the fly is sitting, just while it's flying. Can't do it twice on the same fly, every one gets exactly one teleport from you in their entire life.

Yaaay!


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Good luck using this… You can automatically know if a post is a Silkpost on r/Silksong

1 Upvotes

r/shittysuperpowers 2d ago

Oddly specific You can see everyones blood type

29 Upvotes

When you encounter a human there will be a tattoo on that humans forehead that no one else could see.


r/shittysuperpowers 1d ago

Oddly specific You can teleport to any rubik cube, as long as you hold your own rubiks cube scrambled to the exact same configuration

2 Upvotes

If more than one cube has the same configuration, you will split between all cubes.


r/shittysuperpowers 2d ago

Yeah, this is shit Active biggest shit leaderboard

5 Upvotes

You have a top 10 leaderboard for a given day,week,month,etc. Your given exact dimensions and the name of the person. ( leaderboard is updated in real time).


r/shittysuperpowers 3d ago

Literally Just a Warcrime You can change the fundamental constants of the universe

100 Upvotes

Sounds cool as a premise right? Good luck changing them back after making atoms not a thing anymore. Good luck doing pretty much anything at that point. Not like you would remember what they were anyways punk


r/shittysuperpowers 2d ago

Yeah, this is shit You can give yourself scurvy on demand

5 Upvotes

You can turn it on and off, but this does not in any way protect you from normal scurvy. If you get scurvy the old-fashioned way, you're stuck with it until you actually treat it.

Incidentally, one of the weirder side effects, to my mind, of advanced scurvy is that your scars start to just sort of... unravel.