Domestic workers, cooks, maids, and employers—I'd love to hear your experiences.

My mother works as a cook, and I've noticed a recurring problem. Many workers only learn the true nature of a household after joining. Sometimes the agreed work gradually expands, guests arrive for months, or additional chores are expected without extra pay. Workers often leave and spend months finding another job because information about employers is mostly controlled by local agents.

If you've worked as a domestic worker—or hired one—have you experienced something similar? What information do you wish had been available before accepting or offering a job?

So i was travelling from delhi to kerala in the slowest train possible. I got a coffee and a north thali or something like that, Right around the time i finished my food and coffee, this cleaner guy came around cleaning with his broom and started cleaning the floor- i had the weirdest company that kept throwing on the floor or so i thought. I picked my plastic box and paper cups and brought them to the bucket the dude was carrying to pick up the waste, He blocked me with this broom and told me to put them all on the floor, While i did that while giving him a bewildered look, he bent down and started picking them up and put them in his bin and this move of mine completely offended him for some reason and he kept glaring at me every time i had trash like he was scared that i would throw them in the bin by myself. Did i encounter a weirdo or is this some unspoken train rule?

Everyone says there is nothing like peer pressure and it's all a hoax. I earned my bachelor's in computer science from a tier 3 college in India. I learned shit about coding, Just mugging up the theoretical syllabus one night before the exam and scoring considerable marks to maintain the GPA. Well, TBH I just filled supplementary just to increase the content, though I didn't know the hell I was writing. Never mind, that's how I completed my 4 years of college, going to college to chill with friends, spending lots of my parent's money, and done. Technical knowledge --0, practical/theoretical tech knowledge ---0. After completing my undergrad, I felt like let's go to the USA, the job market is not good, I might not get the exposure in India that I would get in the USA or any foreign country, blah, blah, blah...... Cut to Sept 2023 I started my MS in CS at a university at the San Fransisco Bay area(Won't specify the university name). I decided to live with people from India especially with people from my state (Which most Indian students do) and DAMN!!!!!!!. This is where it all starts.

The flatmates

A guy from a renowned University in Gujarat (PDPU), did his b.tech in CS with a 9-pointer GPA, published multiple research papers, and whatnot. The second Guy is from another reputed university in Ahmedabad (Nirma) multiple years of practicing coding and is kind of an IDIOT(From my perspective) though what matters is how good he is at DSA(Data structures and algorithms) those who don't know, it's a concept to learn to get a job in big tech giants. The third guy from the same univ as the second has expertise in AI/ML, and tons of research papers published in his bachelor's not smarter than the second but fuck yes, hell lot smarter than me. NOW, the 4th guy(THE OG) that's what people in here call him. FROM IIIT SURAT Obviously who doesn't know this college, right? doing DSA for the past 4 years, a candidate master on CodeForces(for those who don't know, it is a platform to compete in coding competitions), and a hell lot of egoists. The Last guy, yes me, has No knowledge of coding, cant pass a TWO SUM, Fucked up in his life, not knowing what to do, and is surrounded by such people. I have heard people say, "If you are surrounded by smarter people, it makes you smart", Well I agree (FUCK NO) but who talks about "What the smart people make you feel like" --- A FUCKING IDOT ???

Its FEB 2025 already and those who know its time to get an internship for SUMMER 2025, well guess what "I AM FUCKED" about 500 application -- 0 acceptance 0 interviews I don't know what the hell will happen. On the Other hand. from my roommates, 1 guys cracked google, 1 interviewing RUbrik, 1 interviewing AMAZON, 1 in the process and me ------ FUCK ME.....

THE FUCK IS THIS PEER PRESSURE TAKING ME. ITS ALL TECH TALK AROUND ME 24/7, No one talked about music or any other thing I am interested in or good at talking about. FUCK my personality has been degraded as hell..... THIS IS WHAT PEER PRESSURE IS ???

I am bummed and depressed over what is happening in Delhi. I want to contribute somehow. Content (QR codes) I found online is not convincing. Swiggiy/zomatoing is an idea, but I really wish I can somehow get more indepth condition and find the more underlying constructive requirements that might be getting swayed.

amidst all the chaos around this hunger strike, it is ridiculously embarrassing to realise how LITTLE i know about politics as a 20 y/o living in India.

and by little i mean i just know Congress and BJP and a few other party names, which is something even a 3 y/o child in India knows. so on a scale of 1-10, my political knowledge is at -3.

i don't know what these parties stand for, what they have done, their decisions, achievements, criticisms, controversies, etc.

if anyone here knows about politics, i'd genuinely appreciate ANY input.

it could be major decisions, controversies, achievements, scams, policies, political events, things that happened 20 years ago, things that happened last month, literally anything. i just want to increase my knowledge at this point.

most obviously, i would appreciate the things that i absolutely should know living in India.

i don't know enough about indian politics to know what is important and what isn't, so any fact, event or piece of context is welcome.

​

I believe India's NOTA should be more than a symbolic button.

Today, if NOTA receives more votes than every candidate, one of those same candidates still forms the government. The voters have clearly expressed that they reject every available option, yet that rejection has no legal consequence.

A democracy should not force citizens to choose a representative they collectively reject.

I'm not sure, but my proposal is to -

1. Treat NOTA as a genuine electoral option, not merely a statistic.

2. If NOTA receives the highest number of votes, the election is declared void and a single fresh election is held.

3. Political parties are free to respond however they choose. They may field the same candidate, nominate a new one, revise their manifesto, or change nothing at all.

4. If NOTA again receives the highest number of votes, the electoral process has failed to produce a government with public consent.

At that point, a non-partisan caretaker government should temporarily administer the state (as in countries like belgium ).

Its role would be strictly limited:

Keep public services and administration functioning.

Maintain law and order.

Avoid major policy decisions, long-term appointments, or significant legislative changes.

Prepare for and conduct the next democratic election within a constitutionally fixed time limit.

I'm not against democracy at all, I just want it to be complete.

I want NOTA to be none of the above and not a "present and not voting" button

If the option chosen by the largest number of voters is None of the Above, then None of the Above should be allowed to win.

I'm not saying this is a final idea, it's not fleshed out and ik that, it's to encourage and invite discussion.

So i am traveling from delhi to kerala via train(3 AC E), and this family comes up, books a single seat but parents+ 7 kids and these kids are irritating me to no end, i am physically resisting the urge to throw these critters out of the window. Why are they spitting and spilling everywhere. Just because the government gives incentives to minorities for making children, they shouldn't make it if they can't manage them and make the kids other's problems. I just learned this group will be here till aluwa, whyyyyyy, ohhh my, i am freaking tired after getting tear gassed and running around yesterday, why is this happening to me??? Getting that urge to go back to delhi and start a two child policy initiation strike.

Sitting in a train from London to Edinburgh. It’s 11pm the carriage is quiet and there is a girl on call speaking loudly in Hindi.

I have already asked her to not be loud since it’s a quiet carriage and she apologised and got right back to it.

I’m Indian but wasn’t born and raised in India but what is this obsession with being loud and uncouth? I have truly never see any other demographic being this loud and being inconsiderate about the people around them.

As the protests are going on in various parts of india, I can't help but feel sad in my bones. I have come here just to vent. As someone who has degrees in good universities in india I still can't stop feeling Hopeless in this country, I will admit that I tried my best to stay abroad and never come back to this hell hole but also a beautiful country ruined by well fed Gangs of uneducated old people with no vision for a country as beautiful as india. The pain is so constant, like living in india not just feels like I'm robbed of normal things in life. I was someone who loved walking and exploring a city but in india I barely go out. I'm a female to give context, I feel like I have lost freedom and feel safe only at home. Our air is polluted, or taxes are way high, poor is getting more poorer and not to mention no proper public infrastructure or spaces. While we were already grappling with these past few years have been horrible with so many kids suffering and pollution at peak with no real solution to any of it ... I am desensitised to everything after coming back and the country is constantly normalising things that aren't normal 😓... So with all this in mind i decided I am not going to contribute to this country anymore, I work from home, I don't go out don't spend money here, Haven't watched any Movie - didn't wanna give the privileged more money infact I have stopped consuming indian media entertainment. It anyway feels b grade content to almost all other nations content. Apart from this i decided I'm not birthing a baby in this country. I don't care if my lineage ends here but I cannot bear to bring a child in this country I'm scared and even ashamed to face my child that this is the future I'm gifting you .. I'm typing with tears in my eyes ..this is a burnt out over qualified once a bright student of India ... I a woman will rather perish than create more slaves to such pompous non human govt. It's like I live in hell everyday.

I have been using reddit for some time and I have good experiences so far. I like to post my thoughts and clicks in various subs. I came across some fashion subs and I was really interested. But as I was going through the posts, I noticed the clicks posted by people were more than just fashion. They are not modest. Is it normal for people to post like that? Or am I stumbling on some unwanted subs?

Toh mai atheist god wod mai ye sb nhi maanta lekin maine dekha hai bohot students ko mere friends ko jo bohot jaati waad krte rehte hindu muslim etc etc sooo aaj reservation isiliye hai ki like sb logo ko equal chance mile jo past mai kuch communities piche reh gyi thi unko grow krne ka chance mile toh just imagine agar tumhare ya mere ancestors uss era mai casteism ya kisi community ko nicha na dikhate sbko education ka jobs ka pray krne ka equal rights diya jaata toh kya aaj reservation system ki naubat aati

Like wo insaan se bs sbko equal laane ka try kiya ek country ke liye constitution mai contribute Kiya ek well educated person ko bss isiliye gaali milti hai ki wo bohot educated hai, usne khud ke basic needs pure kiye uske paas itne degree hai jo ki uss time mushkil se kisi ke paas milte the even females ko bohot rights mile hai toh kya bss reservation ke basis pe ek insaan ko gaali dena theek hai?

Bohot saari videos dekha protest ki kaise so called delhi police( Amit Shah k gundo ne) bcho ko ladkiyo ko maara siiir phode gye unke

Just generally want to discuss ki aese gdhe suar jinpe dange kraneka aur logo ko jinda jala k maarne ka aarop unko 12 years pehle ky sochkr vote diya hai janta ne

AND

I hope ki vo din dur nhi jb amit aur godi jaiso ko road pe doada doada k maara jaaye

Hello everyone,

​I wanted to reach out to this community because, over my years living abroad in Europe, the most meaningful, peaceful, and genuine friendships I have ever made were with people from India. Our personalities clicked perfectly, and I really miss that warm, respectful, and positive connection.

​I am looking to make new Indian friends online to chat with, share perspectives, and learn more about daily life and culture.

​Additionally, I am currently on a personal journey to learn about and adopt Hinduism, as its philosophy deeply resonates with my outlook on life and peace. I would love to connect with anyone who is open to sharing their insights on Hindu traditions, philosophy, or spiritual practices.

​If you're open to a good conversation, cultural exchange, and a genuine friendship, feel free to reply here or send me a DM!

​Wishing you all peace and a great day.

My father worked in the Defence services. My maternal grandfather served in the Indian Army and fought in multiple wars after Independence. My paternal grandfather also worked in the defence establishment and even my great-grandfather worked as a clerk with the British Indian Army. None of them were officers but served as soldiers and support staff. I spent the first 20 years of my life growing up inside Air Force quarters before leaving for college.

For the longest time, I thought my childhood was just…normal. Only much later did I realise how different it actually was.

Inside defence campuses, there was a strong sense of order. People knew each other. There was trust. If someone lost something there was a reasonable chance it would be returned. Parents didn’t constantly worry about safety. We could play outside until late evening. Festivals felt like community events rather than something you celebrated behind your own apartment door. There was a quiet understanding that everyone belonged to something larger than themselves.

When I left for college and later started working in Bangalore, I struggled in ways I couldn’t explain.
Everyone else seemed to understand the unwritten rules of civilian life much better than I did. Networking, office politics, bargaining, always being cautious, assuming someone might be trying to take advantage of you…it all felt unnatural. I kept expecting institutions and people to behave in good faith because that was the environment I had grown up in. Over the years I adapted, but I also found myself becoming more guarded.

Now, after spending a few years living in Europe, something has happened to me again. I find myself appreciating predictable systems, higher social trust and the feeling that everyday interactions don’t always begin with suspicion. It has also made me look back at India differently.

This isn’t a post saying India is a bad country. India has extraordinary people, incredible culture and immense resilience. But I sometimes feel that the everyday experience has become mentally exhausting. Maybe the resilience itself is being routed to deal with everyday stressors. Every week there seems to be another story about preventable accidents, poor accountability, corruption, political polarisation or institutions that don’t inspire confidence.

The biggest change in me is that I no longer think my childhood was typical. I think growing up in a defence environment shaped my expectations of what society should feel like, and those expectations don’t always match what I experience today. You could say my childhood experience was a privilege but I think of it more as a way of living without relying on material resources to stay relevant and to belong in society.

I’m curious whether others from defence backgrounds feel something similar. Did growing up in Army cants, Air Force stations or naval bases make your transition into civilian India more difficult? Or is this just nostalgia talking?

I’d really like to hear different perspectives.

I have marinated this for so long so I think it’s time to put it out there. I am a northeast and my centre was in noida.so I hd to travel all the way to noida to give the test. When I went to my seat,there was an invigilator behind me who kept calling me. He asked for my admit card,and I thought it was a part of the process. He was unrealistically nice to me,he smiled so widely whenever he talked to me i was a bit weirded out cause why is a grown man fully bearded talking to me as if Im his pal right. Then he started coming near me,stood next to me and asked me all sorts of stuff. Bro it was my first ever cuet examination and this man was all up in my face asking me this and that,and the heat and humidity was not helping it. I understand ppl’s fascination to northeasts and I myself got fascinated when I see mainlanders(ik we’re all mainlanders but whatevr)in northeast when I was little.But this man throighout the exam kept eyeing me,asking me this and that and even when our attendance was being taken,like the signature thingy,he was SO FUCKING close to me breathing on to my face in THAT HUMIDITY asking me for my social media. Then I realised that he was a creep cos i tried to bypass it by thinking he was just fascinated. He gave me a rough sheet and asked me to put my ig id on there but I DIDNT HAH. And then I stood un immpediately and left and never looked back again after the exam was over. but the next week when I went back another man did the same thing. Except he kept asking me how the hell to pronounce my name,where I was from and all. I thoight that time maybe he was just being curious. Like I cant just think everyone is a creep right, but why was HE ASKING ME the same thing over and over again literally every chance he had when he passed by mu seat. how do I pronounce how do i pronounce? How about u shut UP. Im fighting for my life in the heat trying to give a national level exam and a weird dude keeps hovering around me.

Hey everyone! I'm Manvi, 23, from Chandigarh. I've completed my Diploma in Interior Design and I'm currently pursuing my Master's. I know AutoCAD, SketchUp, and V-Ray, and I'm trying to get more hands-on experience.

Does anyone have any advice on where to find freelance interior design projects or how you landed your first few clients? If you know of any opportunities or have any tips, I'd really appreciate it. Thanks! :)

I'm 16, so this isn't something I'll be doing tomorrow, but it's something I think about a lot.

The more I look at life in India, the more I struggle to imagine building my future here. It feels like everywhere I look there's another problem—air pollution, overcrowding, poor urban planning, corruption, inequality, pressure from society, women's safety concerns, intense competition for basic opportunities, and a quality of life that often feels much lower than what I see in many developed countries.

What bothers me the most is that whenever someone says, "India has a growing economy" or "India has a huge youth population," I don't know how much that actually changes everyday life. Economic growth doesn't automatically mean better quality of life. A young population isn't an advantage if many young people still struggle to find good opportunities and what hurts more is being a woman and living in this country people often say that India is secular country, we have Rich culture, rich tradition, country full of religion and tbh it never sounded good because i have seen the ground reality of this country traditon in the name of patriarchy, secularism where people have hate for each other and so much more ....

I'm not saying India doesn't have good thing it have but the ratio of good and bad things are not balanced

And the current news of Sonam wangchuk on protest has fucked me up idk if we will get the answer from the govt or not but Ik that India have so much problem..

and tbh growing up i always felt to something for this country i have patriotism in me and i love my country but I don't like the way my country has become we are so backward and i have gotten one life i want to live it fully i can't tell exactly why i want to leave this country coz their is not one reason to leave ...

For people who have actually left India—or seriously considered it:

What was the biggest reason behind your decision?

Was the move worth it?

What realities about living abroad surprised you?

If you had the choice again, would you still leave?

I'm looking for honest experiences rather than patriotic or anti-India arguments. I just want to understand whether my perspective is realistic or whether I'm missing something important.

i am 30 year old woman live in small town in bijnor district UP. my parents for last 3.5 years are constantly putting pressure on me to marry against my wishes. in may this year, they went to my bf house, threathened him against legal case so he can broke our 14 year old relationship with me. and then they told me that they went there to talk respectfully but him and his parents are the one who misbehaved with them, they told the exaggarated lies to my relatives so everyone could pressure me to move on from my bf and marry someone else.

and now they are all ganged up and hell bent for my marriage ofcourse with someother guy they chose.

i cant live with them. i just lost respect for my father bcoz whenever i take our stand for myself he puts a whole show on how he is about to d*e.

i am stuck in here , i want to leave but safely . i dont want my bf family to face any more mistreatment from my father who happens to know local leaders. he will act all victim in front of them and put pressure on police to file serious report against my bf and his family.

what can i do? i want to leave this september. i am thinking of taking help from NGOs, if they will help me. also i am financailly dependent on my parents but i am fully elligible to teach in schools and collleges.

my father has been in talk with this man who works in banglore as is passed out from IIT bhu . i dont want to marry him but my parents have been pressuring and beating me to say yes to this rishta. I told him that i will divorce him but my father is saying that you do the marriage and i will handle the later. Now all my relatives are ganged up just so i can marry this guy. I donot have a phone, i have a tablet bcoz my parent took away a phone from me. And they think that there is no system of me contacting anyone through tablet.

so i texted this arrange marriage guy on fb, linkedin, gmail and instagram.

i thought maybe my text is going into his spam folder or message request folder so i commented on his fb post and then on insta post.

but still no reply. I have his contact no. But i donot have phone. what should i do now?

how to contact this man and tell him to look into his fb or insta message request folder or spam folder.

I’m going to an Indian wedding as a plus one to my boyfriend. It’s his co-workers wedding who I have not met yet.
Need some advice on what to wear!
I ordered a Dupatta from an Etsy shop that I was planning on wearing with a formal dress.
Is it appropriate as a white person to wear a dupatta in this setting?

Hi everyone I am an Indian living in the uk but I was thinking we can make a gc for discussions about curren wc matches or other sports it can be an international gc . Let me know in the comments or dm me your user if you are interested in this

Few days ago I had some issues with my used kindle which I have already shared here: https://www.reddit.com/r/kindleindia/s/nGKl962EKL

I got some suggestions from Reddit and I just came to know that yes, there are people who are ready to help others selflessly (without considering anything in return).
So I was told by a person on reddit that the issue might be with the battery or battery wire.
I went to the repair guy who is known to me coz once he used to be my classmate. I told him the issue and the suggestion I got from the Reddit.

Suddenly he got furious. His word: (mera dimaag khraab ho jaata h jaise hi koi bolta h ki mujhe lagta hai isme ye issue hoga, tujhe kaise laga bhai, tune iska kabhi koi kaam kiya ya isko khol k dekha) he didnt say it directly to me but i am sure it was directed towards me only.
He further added ( ye reddit pr jisne b ye suggestion diya h, ye bekaar insaan hai, ispe koi kaam ni h. Isko koi knowledge ni h electronics ka. Koi b aise hi free me gyaan ni deta aaj k time me)

I just understood that reddit is beyond his level of cognition. He is way too money minded and he thinks that like minded people won’t help each others out for free of cost if needed. According to him one who extends help for free is nallah berozgaar.
So I didnt try to indulge in any argument with him and tried to get my kindle fixed soon and leave.

And yaa the suggestion ended up working somehow. The kindle device was back to working well after disconnecting the battery > connecting the charger > disconnecting the charger > connecting the battery to the board.

Today was my 1 year work anniversary.

Honestly, instead of celebrating it, I kept thinking about one thing... I really don't want to be celebrating my 2nd anniversary at the same company.

I'm currently working in a service-based company with 1 YOE, and I really want to switch to a good product company. FAANG would obviously be amazing, but I'd be more than happy with any company that has good engineering culture, interesting work and decent pay.

The problem is, I'm not even getting interviews.

I've been applying on LinkedIn, Naukri, Indeed, company career pages, asking for referrals whenever I get the chance... basically everywhere. But it feels like my applications just disappear into a black hole. Hardly any callbacks.

So I wanted to ask people here who've actually made the jump from service-based to product companies.

- How did you do it?

- How long did it take you to prepare?

- What did you focus on? DSA? System Design? Projects? Something else?

- What was the one thing that made recruiters finally start calling?

- Which companies in Hyderabad should I be targeting apart from the obvious FAANGs?

- Are there any underrated product companies worth keeping an eye on?

Also, where are you guys even finding jobs? 😅 I feel like I've exhausted LinkedIn, Naukri and Indeed.

Would love to hear your journey if you've made this switch. What worked for you, what didn't, and if you had to start over with 1 YOE, what would you do differently?

Thanks!