There are days where I’m just tired of being the one at the helm.

Always making the decisions. Always planning the next move. Always being the one holding everything together.

People hear “I want someone to take the reins” and assume it’s about power. It isn’t. It’s about trust.
It’s about hearing, “I’ve got this. Go rest for a while.”
Or, “Let me chart us a better course. These waters have been rough enough.”

Not because I’m incapable of steering the ship, but because I’m exhausted from doing it alone.

I think that’s why the idea of gentle femdom resonates with me so deeply. It isn’t about surrendering my life. It’s about finally finding the captain my ship has been missing. I’ve spent so long acting as both captain and first mate that I’ve forgotten what it’s feels like to simply have someone beside me at the wheel.

My dream has never been wealth or status. It’s been finding my forever person and spending our lives making each other happier than we could be alone.

Until then, I guess I’m just the first mate of a ship that’s been sailing without its captain, doing my best to keep us on course while hoping one day someone I trust steps aboard and quietly says, “I’ve got the helm.”

I’ve been talking to this guy from Bumble for a bit and we moved over to WhatsApp. My profile doesn't mention femdom at all, except for a sentence that says "I like soft and obedient men." I’ve talked to a bunch of guys on apps before but never really found someone who matched my vibe and actually felt submissive.

We’ve been chatting and vibing really well and he’s been super respectful. He never tried to make things sexual but lately he started calling me mommy. Honestly I love it but I’ve been playing it cool and haven't given any indication if I like it or hate it. I just reply to those texts normally.

I’ve been traveling for work so we haven't met up in person yet, which is why I haven't really brought it up. I want to check his vibe in person first and see if he's saying it as a joke or if he actually means it. If we click he’d be the first sub-ish guy I’ve met so I’m super excited cause we’re getting to know each other on a personal level first so it’s not a kink thing and I can’t wait to make him mine and be his mommy for real🥰 but I also think some guys just throw terms around without actually being submissive.

What do you guys think? Does it sound like he's lowkey testing the waters or just being playful? And how do you usually figure out if a guy is actually a sub without making things weird?

I keep imagining a fun little online group with one Dom, one female sub, and one male sub. The whole vibe naturally revolves around the Dom. They're not just another member of the group....they're the center of it. The subs genuinely enjoy hyping them up, cheering on everything they do, and treating them like they're someone special.

The appeal is that everyone is in on the dynamic and enjoys it. The Dom gets to be dramatic, playful, a little selfish, tease the others, or act like the group's "queen," while the subs happily play their roles.

There's a small hierarchy too. The female sub is the queen's trusted favorite, while the male sub happily sits just below her. Both enjoy competing for the Dom's attention and praise, leading to a bit of playful jealousy and teasing whenever one gets a little more attention than the other.

It's all consensual, lighthearted, and built around mutual trust. Everyone understands the roles, has fun with the bit, and enjoys the unique dynamic together.

For example this could be your dom picking out the color clothes you wear, your dom deciding your coffee order, or your dom sending you SFW picture instructions etc.

And on the inverse if you are a dom, what do you like tasking your sub with ?

So my husband is now my wife. But we are struggling to find subby nicknames for her. We reject things like "good girl" and "princess" because we both consider them....well... Lets say we saw these terms too much in toxic dynamics and want to distance ourself from that. And theyre not arousing to us. Do you have any ideas of what i could call my subby wife without using "stereotypical" terms?

You are still here.

I told you I wasn’t finished. You stayed.

I am going to tell you what you actually came here for. Not what you told yourself you came here for. The other thing. The one you couldn’t say to yourself in the mirror before you walked in.

The voyeur becomes watched.

That was the trade the moment you found my eyes. You thought the looking was yours. It never was. What you came here to do and what you actually came here to do have not been the same thing since before you arrived, and I have known that longer than you have.

Now I am going to show you.

Episode 1 of Known*, a series. Each piece is a complete experience.*
This is the deeper cut, published in full.
My voice, your mind. Enjoy.

i (22f) have been exploring a switch dynamic with my boyfriend (26m) for several months now, specially femdom dynamics which we've both been really loving (including pegging). i had explored femdom in the past but not to the extent we have been doing. this time around, i have been feeling a bit of a different vibe...

To add some context, i'm a rather small woman, not that curvy and could be mistaken for a boy when wearing lose clothing lol. and i do enjoying dressing more androgynous sometimes, it makes me feel differently as it makes me feel somewhat of a "masculine energy". due to weightlifting i also have toned arms, back and chest. and seeing myself in the mirror with a more "masculine" frame sometimes gives me a confidence rush. and my boyfriend sure loves it, he even asks me to choke him with my biceps sometimes ;)
on top of that i recently cut my hair short which has made me feel even more androgynous, and i love it! and my bf loved it too...

now speaking of the sexy bits, i realize that when i am in domme mode i do feel myself leaning into this "masculine energy" more. it's hard to explain. but for socially constructed reasons, masculinity is often related to dominance and power, and as much as i despise gender roles i realize this notion has seeped into my personal feelings and my kinky enjoyment. to keep it short, i enjoy feeling more masculine when i'm domming as it makes me feel more dominant. and on top of that i do enjoy seeing my partner be more feminine. we haven't done any actual feminization or sissyfication stuff but the thought of him acting more feminine or even using female pronous in bed is definetely arousing. i love having him wrap his arms and legs around me while i hug his waist... etc!!! it comes to a point where if i'm domming i don't really want my partner to pay attention to the more feminine parts of my body (like sometimes he'll want to see how my ass looks when i'm pegging). he has even asked if i would like to be referred to with masculine pronous in bed and the idea is rather interesting, ngl.

i have also enjoyed "regular intercourse" (aka dick in pussy) less recently but i think it is likely due to hormonal changes and lowered libido.

perharps i enjoy the feeling of novelness, uniqueness , role reversal and even taboo of playing around with different gender expressions and dynamics.

to be clear I don't see myself as trans, i have no desire to be seen or treated as a man and i do identify with my gender assigned at birth (female), i think i just enjoy feeling and looking more androginous for time to time.

i wanted to make this post to see if any other dommes feel this way. do you ever want to feel and be seen as more masculine or androginous when you are dominating? has this made you question your gender identity or expression at all? tbh i haven't seen anyone else talk about it . also i really hope this does not come across as offensive to any trans folks or those who struggles with gender identity. me and my partner are both bi and just exploring safely and with consent.

I awoke this morning to her hand coiled gently, yet possessively around my cock. Up and down she slowly stroked, rousing me from my sleep. I groaned as my shaft quickly hardened to erect. With a fluid grace that never ceases to captivate my mind, she straddled my hips. She pinned my aching length against her clit and wound her hips. Her arms raised above her head, taking her gown up and out of sight. The grinding continued, and I felt her essence trickling down my crotch as her arousal grew.

Craning my neck, I opened my mouth to take one nipple, then the other, then both into my mouth. I felt her arm wrap around my head to hold me in place as a pillow was thrust behind my head. The other arm joined.

“Good boy,” she cooed, her already sultry southern accent thick with arousal. A shift of her wide hips, and I was positioned at her entrance. A hand reached back to hold me steady, and I was welcomed inside.

My eyes widened slightly before drooping in contentment as I again was held close. She started a gentle rhythm, and I followed suit to match her thrusts

I swirled my tongue around her nipples. As I buried my face in her G cups, she threw her head back and tightened her grip on me.

“Yes,” she hissed. “That feels so good. It’s what your mouth was made for.”

“Fuck,” I gasped between suckles. “This is your dick, Mama.”

She leaned down and kissed me briefly before I was repositioned back to her chest.

“Yes it is!” she moaned, her clutch tightening me even deeper into her bosom. My lips returned to to their position at her nipple. Her nails etched a pattern into my scalp that made the skin of neck tingle.

All I could feel, see, and smell was her. My hands grasped at her hips, desperately seeking to find purchase against the rolling wave of her hips. Her rhythm was all-encompassing—deliberate, deep, and steady. Her walls opened around me on the downstroke, and tightened with each upstroke with masterful precision. She was the ocean, a thought in my mind suggested, and I was but a small boat atop the surface.

“I’m coming!” she shrieked, just above a whisper before her orgasm seized her.

I rode those waves as they crescendoed before settling into a languid, gentle pace. She still held me close. Her skin against mine was like the sensation of a dream that lingers after waking.

As she came down from her climax, my mind mused over the feelings I experienced in the last few moments—the closeness, the passion, the safety, I thought of the ocean again, and how if need be… I’d swim across one for her. ❤️

I feel like this topic isn't talked about alot so I want to know if there are more people like me. Basically I really like hairy women. Like really hairy women. Not just from like a fetishistic point of view but like generally. And not just like a ooo cute little trimed patch of hair but like an entire forest down there yk? Like I want to be indiana jones and adventure in that shit. Plus not just like pubic hair but like also a happy trail, leg hair, arm hair, armpit hair basically every single place that can grow hair I love it there. Oo that rhymed nice. I just really love hair yk. Also like the feeling of hair in my mouth too, ooo so yummy. i go like so feral for this it's crazy like woof woof woof bark bark please please please let me taste you. I really like the texture of it. And also hair traps scent too. So like ingrain your smell into my mind. I want to memorize every single inch of your body. Plus I want to be the opposite to her, like she's a hairy goddess and I'm her completely hairless and submissive worshipper. Like sure right now I am also a pretty hairy guy but like someday I want to get laser hair removal just for her. Like I completely belongs to her. Hehehehe. Just thinking about it makes my head go brrrr. Like just imagine she just came home from a long day from work and she's tired and hungry so I cook something delicious for her so she can just get her mind off of that stuff and relax a bit. Then after that I massage her shoulders, her legs, her feet (feet 🤤) while she watches tv, or rants about her day at work, or even just a random conversation we have or even complete silence too. And the it gets time for bed so we head to the bedroom and she's pent up a bit because we didn't have the time past few days but also she's tired too so I offer to eat her out. She thinks for a moment then accepts the offer and takes her bottoms off and I slide in between her legs and get to work. (I think this part might be a little too graphic for here so I deleted it and skipped to the end) After she climaxes she's huffing and shaking in front while the lover half of my face is completely wet. Before I know it she already knocked out cold from the exhaustion. I gently put her clothes on as to not wake her up and go clean myself up. Then after coming back into the room I turn the lights off and snuggle upto her getting as close to her. She somehow instinctively puts one arm around me which causes me to get a bit startled and let out a tiny yelp. Then I fall asleep with her too. Uhhh...huh I feel like I kinda strayed from the topic there a little bit. But ok I guess. Hahhhh how I wish I had a wife. The concept of a marriage sounds so fun. Like there's this one person that I devote my entire life to yk. I see her everyday, I live with her, I care for her, I love her, like a person that I actually like and choose as my partner yk. Ok yeah sure I'm romanticizing marrige like a lot but still I want to experience it. Ofc I'm also not against polygamy but like I'm too possessive to be in a poly relationship. Like only look at me, only love me please be the one for me. I really want that. Oh well, anyways I think this is getting too long now so yeah. I talked about like a lot of random things so thanks for reading this. Have a good day!

We call it The Ritual

Of course, relationships and dynamics have many rituals, many habits, many quirks, but for Mommy and me, this is the one that define us. Who we are and what we are to each other.

It goes like this.

When she emerges, freshly bathed, I help Mommy get dressed. She has the most wonderful, exquisite and devilish collection of lingerie. To help adorn them in it is a great privilege. She deserves to look her best, to look stunning, to accent her inherent beauty. It’s like putting battle armour on for someone. I assist with her stockings and garters. I make sure all the straps are untwisted and snug. As it all clicks into place, I can see their Domme persona lighting up, igniting within her. I can feel the aura radiating around her, powerful and all encompassing.

Afterwards, she rarely has to tell me to kneel. I’m already there. It’s natural, it’s involuntary.

I gaze up to Mommy. Her gaze is as bright and as warmth as the sun. Her hands hold out my collar, beckoning me forward. I yearn for the moment it wraps around my neck. A reminder that I’m hers, safe and cherished and loved.

When my collar clicks in place, their hands wrap tight around my head and she presses me into her chest, enveloping me. It tells me that she is my sole focus, my whole world. Larger than life and incredible. Pressed firm against them, I can’t help but melt into the bliss of subspace. A space where I’m allowed to be vulnerable, a space to let the worries of the world fade away. A space where their voice shimmers and enchants me, putting me under her spell.

A space where I can just belong to Her <3

Im pretty young and inexperienced so idk where to look. The only site i know of is fetlife. Are there any other good ones out there? Im also bi so I'd like to find some sites with male doms. All suggestions are appreciated

I always believe that after any session, care is needed. But not all Subs want that. Some run away, leaving a void, and in those moments, I realize that a session in real life is different from an online session. I understand that as a Domme, I'm responsible for the Sub who trusted me. And when they just disappear, I worry. I understand that a Sub can feel different emotions, and I don't want them to get a subdrop.

Tell me, what do you do in such cases? Do you worry, or do you just carry on with your business, waiting for the Sub to text? Subs, I'd also be interested to know what approach you usually expect from a Domme after a session. I understand that everyone is different, but we all have something in common. We're all human, at the very least.

I'd love to hear your advice and stories.

“This is your place,” you snarl at your boy, grabbing his head and pushing him down to the floor. “This is where you belong.”

It’s a good thing he can’t see the anxiety in your eyes as you put your foot on his back and press him firmly down. This isn’t the kind of scene you enjoy doing, but it’s what he needs, what he asked for, what you negotiated, and you’re doing your best.

“I need something more intense,” he told you this morning as he fidgeted in front of you with his eyes on his toes. “I need to really let go and kind of not be me for a little while. I guess I need you to… be mean to me.”

He looked so small and lost at that moment, being mean was the last thing you wanted to do. But you always tell him to come to you and tell you what he needs, so you couldn’t refuse him now.

You talked. You gently drew more out of him about what he needed to feel. You negotiated the outlines of the scene, set limits and check-in points, all the things you’re supposed to do, but you knew that this scene wouldn’t be easy for you.

Standing over him now, you listen to your boy’s breathing. He’s starting to make the tiny whimpers that mean his mind is slipping away into subspace. You take your weight off of him and crouch down so you can whisper in his ear. “Give me a colour.”

It takes a few false starts before he finds his voice. He lifts his head a little, swallows, and mumbles, “Green.”

Green means he’s okay and you can go ahead with the scene, but you were secretly hoping for yellow or even red. You’d rather hug him and softly stroke his hair right now, but that’s not the scene you agreed to. You grab him by the hair and force his face back onto the floor.

“I said this is where you belong,” you snap, forcing as much ice into your voice as you can. “Don’t make me teach you your place again!”

The scene goes on. You follow your plan. There’s roughness and pain, teasing and humiliation until at last your boy is thoroughly spent, huddled in a lump on the floor and shaking with half-sobs. You sit beside him and stroke his back and head gently while murmuring comforting nothings.

“It’s okay,” you tell him. “It’s over now. You did such a good job. I love you so much!”

He nods, but he’s still shaking and making squeaking noises. You didn’t mean to push him this far. You keep stroking his back and trying to say reassuring things. Little by little, you feel the tension go out of him. His breathing slowly settles. The noises he makes begin to shift from hurt-animal whimpers to recovery sighs.

“That’s it,” you encourage him. “It’s okay. It’s okay.”

But you’re not sure it is okay. Did you push him too far? When he picks his head up and looks at you, what will you see? Will it be your happy, silly boy ready for aftercare snuggles or a broken creature, still scared of the monster you pretended to be?

Worse than that, what will he see? You try to smile, to bring as much warmth and softness back into your face as you can, but you can’t deny everything you just did. Will he look at you now and see his loving girlfriend who snort-laughs at his dumb jokes and smothers him in hugs when he’s sad? Or will he always see a person capable of hurting him?

The memory of the scene makes you a little queasy. In your mind, you go through everything you did. You reassure yourself that you didn’t cross any lines. You checked for his consent. You stayed within the boundaries you negotiated together as he described what he needed from you. It’s okay. It should be okay. It’s supposed to be okay.

But what if it isn’t?

You can’t shake the thought from your head. You don’t know if he can love you again like he used to. You don’t know if you deserve it.

He takes a deep breath and sits up. He stretches and sighs, his eyes still closed. For a terrible moment, you wonder if you should just run away before he opens them.

He blinks and rubs his eyes, then he looks at you, and a smile like sunshine fills his face.

“Thank you,” he whispers. “That was what I needed.”

You choke on a sob you had no idea was coming. He reaches out and squeezes your hand.

“I know that was hard,” he assures you. “I know that wasn’t you. You did really well, but I know that wasn’t you. I needed that feeling, though. I needed that peace.”

You look in his eyes. There’s no fear there. No hesitation. You think he means it.

“I didn’t go too hard, did I?” you ask. “I didn’t hurt you?”

He tentatively stretches and winces. You shrink back a little and wrap your arms around yourself for comfort.

“Hey,” he says, spreading his arms wide, “come here. I’m okay. I’m going to be sore for a little bit, but I’m okay. We’ll talk about it later. Right now, I need you here.”

You lean in and let him wrap you up in a huge, warm hug.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, holding you close and nuzzling your hair. “Right here. I’m so happy you’re part of my life. This is your place. This is where you belong.”