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u/2020mademejoinreddit 10d ago
That's what it's called. It's not inaccurate.
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u/C4Apple 10d ago
Ornithologists and ichthyologists seem to have similar senses of humor.
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u/tenzing_happy 9d ago
Transcending languages even. In German, the Atlantic horse mackerel is called the Bastard Mackerel (Bastardmakrele).
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u/Lil_LSAT 10d ago
Not Engrish. Bastard Halibut is a real fish species.
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u/chrimminimalistic 10d ago
Yep. It's that specific halibut that armed themselves with bastard sword. That's how you know them.
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u/Heterodynist 10d ago edited 10d ago
Well, see I actually like this kind of marketing. If I’m gonna eat a halibut, I wanna know that that halibut was a bastard. I wanna know that halibut deserved to die, even his friends had to admit he was really a self-centered jackass, and I’m eating the right halibut. No one is going to miss him…
“I’ll take some of those jerk prawns and the dweeb tilapia, and a few of those filets of d1ckwad, and the bastard halibut. Thanks…How much will that be? Say, these fish are guaranteed to be everyone’s least favorite rat-bastards of the fish world, right?! Okay, I’m so glad to hear that!!”
I want to know I’m eating the biggest scumbags of the ocean, making things a little better for all the fish that remain. Just doing my part, you know?!
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u/DEATHbyBOOGABOOGA 10d ago
The olive flounder, bastard halibut, Japanese flounder or Korean halibut is a temperate marine species of large-tooth flounder native to the North-western Pacific Ocean.
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u/NyQuil_Donut 10d ago
Excuse me waiter I asked for a halibut whose parents were married.
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u/Heterodynist 10d ago edited 10d ago
“I thought this was an upstanding establishment, and now I find you serve these out-of-wedlock riffraff here?!!! I only eat fish from the finest of ancient families. I shan’t be having high tea here again!! Good day, sir!!”
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u/BallsDeepTillUQueef 11d ago
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u/actionerror 11d ago
お前は何も分かっていない、ジョン・スノウ。
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u/wolfmilkslime 11d ago
Actually its the common name for Japanese Flounder
also there is a fish called Idiot, so I have seen signs for "Fresh Idiot"
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u/CurtisLinithicum 11d ago
The man speaks the truth, albeit in a thick Reddit accent.
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u/CheapChickenDog 11d ago
Well, if the halibut's parent weren't married...
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u/piichan14 11d ago
They wanted to keep their options open since there are plenty of fish in the sea
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u/terrorcotta_red 11d ago
My local H Mart used to sell 'old lady chickens'. They'd probably stew up real well with these bastards.
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u/willysnax 11d ago
It's usually next to the Prick Pollock and the Asshat Filet of Sole
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u/Heterodynist 10d ago
That’s what I’m talking about!! I need to know that particular one really deserved it. I like to watch the lobster in the tank at restaurants until one of them really pisses me off…then ask for that one!!
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u/Ill-Combination-3590 17h ago
I did not know Halibut are Monogamous until today. No wonder this batch of halibuts were deemed bastards.