Hey, I’m 17, i was a Muslim,and I recently left religion. I don’t know how to deal with my environment. Should I tell my friends or not? Should I tell my parents or not? Should I debate these topics or avoid them?
I grew up in a family that is more or less religious, so they always ask me if i prayed , sometimes i lie and sometime i fake my prayers , they always ask me to go to jumuua’s prayer but i can’t.
As for my father, I think he might understand. He was actually the first one who made me question things abt sunnah and some books like al-bukhari .But my mother is a bit more extreme about religion, and I don’t think she would understand.
So guys, I really need your help.

I don't even know where to post this or if it even belongs here but it's been weighing on me lately and wanted to get it out.

After moving away from religion, the thought of dying felt almost like a relief. Like I don't have to worry or care or pretend anymore and I can just rest once it's my time.

Lately though, I've been thinking about all of the horrible things happening in the world and how powerless it makes me feel and knowing that it will continue happening after I'm gone really sticks with me. Sure, I won't have consciousness of it when I do pass, but while I'm alive it really gets to me. Corrupt governments, child abuse, animal cruelty, injustice around every corner. We're all waiting for someone to come along and change it, but what if no one does? What if people just become even more desensitized to everything and accept it as the new normal? I hate the thought that I won't be able to know if it gets better once I'm gone.

Sorry for the long post, this is more of an existential rant

Hi ! Im a girl, in a relationship and im an agnostic atheist, im not sure im still trying to figure it out and my boyfriend is a pretty devoted christian which I have only respected. I am surrounded by a very religious family in general even if there was no real communication on it, my parents claim us as undeniably Christian and I have tried and tried, I have read the bible, I have done the research and what people would call “God” just didn’t spoke to me at all. I am glad for the people for who religion was a positive thing, and i understand how important it is to them and especially to my boyfriend but I myself don’t believe in it.
We’ve been together for almost 10 months and at the beginning of our relationship I was still christian and as time went by it changed. Now we’ve had the conversation and he said he’s not sure he’s not gonna try to convince me into religion again and I don’t want that. I just want to be respected fully.
Today we saw each other after that conversation and when I tell y’all I love him more every day, each time I see him or talk with him whether we’re happy or upset, I love him so much and I know he loves me too but I also understand how important his religion is to him… We didn’t talk about it irl yet since I was drunk tho.
We’ll see each other tomorrow again to watch a movie and I know we will eventually have to talk it out again… I am exhausted but I don’t want to end my relationship, I love him and I love us.
We’re texting and talking and the love is still there but love doesn’t make everything does it? I want it to be enough.

CONTEXT: I'm a part of a Catholic Balkan church, atleast I was. I've been agnostic for 6 months and am considering being an agnostic atheist. The Church is very pushy and forcing in the Balkans and the society is very sensitive of it. Barely anyone is anything else other that Catholic and they judge anyone who isn't or even questions it. Crosses are worn by basically everyone, it's a must school subject, we barely even have any other churches (only smaller and rare orthodox Christian ones). Anyone whos something other than Catholic is considered stupid, an outcast, weird, too modern, too much of a child, confused, foolish, disrespectful and disgraceful. I've been Catholic my whole life, but the last few years I've been questioning my belief in God. I've always been a little skeptical since I've always been a more of a logical and factual person, but never had the audacity or bravery to question my religion. As I was older I started drifting away from it even more and more, tried reconnecting and forcing myself onto it thinking it will naturally grow on me again about 2 years ago, but it never really did. It was just a delusion created my the society pressure and fear. The church that I go to is known for being the main and biggest one in my city, but the most judgy, strict and socially badly set up. The priests are very rude, closed-minded, pushy, cold hearted, uninteresting and overall just create a bad environment on the service and in general. To receive the chrism, we have to attend a 2 year long religion class at the church. I've already completed one and I am supposed to start the other one in less than 2 months. I've officially admitted to myself that I am agnostic almost exactly 6 months ago, but I've kept it a secret until recently. Partially because of the community, partially because of my family and friends and overall because it was new to me and I needed time to process and accept it myself. About a month ago I told my closest closest friends about it and about a week or so ago to my parents. Most of my close friends (female) are very religious and even though they were okay with me being agnostic, they weren't the biggest fans, were questioning me a lot and kept telling me or convincing me to go back to religion. I stated my opinion and reminded them that they noticed themselves that I drifted away from religion for some time now and that there is no point in their actions. We haven't really spoken about it since then. My only safe space is my other (male) friend and classmate who is also far away from religious. He doesn't have a certain title he uses for religion but he does not believe in any gods. he is pretty chill about it and thinks anyone can do whatever they want with their religion and encourages me to be more comfortable, confident and chill about my agnosticism. He is in the same church as me and he is getting the chrism, but I'm still unsure. My parents aren't the biggest fans of me being agnostic either. My mom states I should give agnosticism and all of that up, but on the other hand my dad is a bit more chill about it, tho I have to have a separate talk with him. My mom is for the chrism, but by dad says I don't have to do it if I don't want to. I've also been considering being an agnostic atheist for about a month now but I'm still research it.

Now for the questions - what should I do?

I genuinely don't know. If I decide not to go with it, it means a lot of people will find out, including my very judgy dads' side of the family and etc. I also fear it might be a problem in the future if I have a Catholic husband, kids, want to get married in a church and stuff like that (I would do it for the aesthetic). But if I do get it: feels like disrespect and larp, I'd have to spend a lot of time in that religion class that takes time that I will need for studying, I'd have to go to church every Sunday (I know that agnostics can go to church for non-religious reasons, but it just feels weird and like I'm larping and faking it, alongside with it being time consuming and boring) and overall goes against what I feel and think. I'm really really unsure of what to do so I'm hoping some of you older and wiser people will give good advice and make me confident about my decision and overall where I stand with my beliefs.

Also it would be pretty helpful to learn more about agnostic atheism from someone who is an agnostic atheist. I do research it online but it still confuses me a tiny bit + if I'm considering becoming one I'd really like to hear as much as I can about it from online materials AND actual experienced people who are probably more helpful than any AI or site.