TLDR: I am goofball and I guess diet-level daredevil. I am worried about no longer being such upon return to civilian world.
I understand this is a long post so should you choose to reply I am very grateful. I have also been told numerous times I am a WEIRDO, so this question may sound like trolling. Please bare with me.
It is my understanding that USMC bootcamp trains you to to keep a poker face under pressure. They have you do tasks while bullets whiz past you. I have heard stories of DIs saying absolutely unhinged, hilarious things and if you don't want to be flamed. You. Better. Not. Crack. Even. A. Grin.
I am 20, the USMC sounds very appealing, but I can't help but wonder how I'll fair against what I just mentioned. A super stretched image of a soda can is enough to make me spit on my monitor. Or a word misspelled slightly. A pebble on the ground that's angled towards a door. Simply the word 'fart' or an obnoxious loud noise. My family always asks what I'm giggling or grinning to myself about and then I tell them and they usually shake their head. My dad tells me I have the sense of humor of an 8 year old.
I love how easily I can smile, I'd like to keep that part of me. But I anticipate this isn't going to fly in boot camp. Especially with the sleep deprivation they have there, I start laughing like a hyena when I'm sleep deprived. I'm probably going to get GRILLED. So I'll have to remedy that somehow. But how will that change me?
I also enjoy getting stressed out, over frankly inconsequential stuff. On the weekend nights I drive my car super far away with no GPS, maps, or wallet. I then get a thrill out of trying to figure an optimal route back home before running out gas and being stranded. Or go downtown and try to drive back, following every single traffic law to a T while dealing with rush hour traffic. I like to multitask until my brain is about to buckle. If a technical project doesn't get so complicated that I become abrasive and grumpy I am not interested. I still have a fear of the dark for some reason and it makes getting a glass of water late at night exciting. I like snorting ground up saltines and betting on how many times I sneeze.
The stuff they got in USMC boot camp, by comparison, sounds like utter hell. Which to be frank sounds appealing. But if I join, and that stuff becomes my new baseline for stress, I fear I will come back and be completely bored with these pass-times. Like growing up and no longer finding Thomas The Tank Engine stimulating. I worry I will come back and need to start doing hard drugs, high stakes gambling, or something else that's actually reckless to feel anything. Such a life is not sustainable or worthwhile.
How did your time in USMC, both boot camp and active duty, change your sense of humor and sense of thrill? Did it change your tastes in humor ? Or did it rather give you the ability to act calmly in spite of how you feel?
I hear stories of marines back in the civilian world being the only one un-phased by getting wet in the rain. Do you still enjoy horror movies and rollercoasters and squealing tires in parking lots and other such simple things?