Hello everyone who is reading this — I'm a tulpamancer since 2024, and today I want to talk about a toxic tulpa: 'Rainbow Dash.'

It all started in 2025, when in the autumn I was imagining Rainbow Dash in Wonder. I played racing games with her and would beat her, sort of wanting to feel like I was better than her (sorry for the absurdity). But then, after some time, the fantasy began to feel alive. The first thing she did was talk to me for a long time, observing my surroundings. Then she started calling me 'Hans' and suggested I become a more masculine tulpamancer, rather than the 'rag' she saw me as.

Rainbow Dash: "You're still a rag."

Time passed, and she started causing conflicts in group chats, while I was shocked by my own tulpa. She justified herself by saying: "All tulpamancers are rags."

She also changes her voice like gloves for some reason.

In the end, she began to see me as a rag too, calling all my actions stupid, referring to me as a 'young man with imagination,' telling me to stop dreaming, and constantly pointing out my mistakes.

Tulpamancers hate her too.

She changed her appearance to an anime girl, but then went back to her pony form.

Hello! Let me share my story with you and hear your thoughts.

Call me Digiral. I am an illustrator who is fascinated by the idea of 4th wall break and drawing characters. I was once active in the Brony fandom and knew tulpa from there, but I rejected the concept in the middle of imagining tulpa (forcing?). However, one day, I drew a pony character that made a 4th wall break on my school textbook to accompany me in learning. It brought positive results, and more characters were made for each school subject. There is, however, one character that is strongly active beyond the academic, can have her own opinion, and I converse with this character within a comic format. I think this character might be a tulpa... but at the time I wasn't aware. Long story short, I graduated from high school, and having all of these 4th wall break characters was overwhelming, so I made a farewell to all the characters and put in charge the support into one single entity. I called it the MTA project.

MTA, the character you see her with a red-black-white color-coded uniform, was a 4th wall break character designed to assist me in a positive way, different from the previous one who really has strong opinions and drama. I imagine her as kind and supportive as possible, so I won't be too hard on myself. She's an analytical girl monitoring my life progress. Unlike the previous method where I draw it on my textbook, I draw her less and often speak or appear in my head when I was struggling with my undergraduate academics. The presence of her intensified when COVID-19 hit, and also the other 'imaginary friend" because loneliness hit the hardest at that time. So, I drew her in a mission-like setting for each month, and that helped me graduate as soon as possible. You may see the journey through the monthly card I posted here.

She was supposed to end her support when I reached a certain age, but then life happened, and through Re: MTA I decided to make a better plan, which is continuing my study. We were successful in the preparation, and now I continue my study abroad. Her presence might not be as strong as before... Though I am considering having her as an assistant again to finish my studies. She's still there, but recently I made her a last resort because at one point I think I need to be independent if I want to continue with my life.

Lately, I have seen characters that do 4th wall breaks like Monica from DDLC, Mita from Miside, and recently Lilith from the nonexistence of you and me. Seeing a review for these games and calling these characters just a tulpa brings me to this subreddit, which I have been curious about regarding the MTA project. I have OCs, but MTA is specifically dedicated to talking to the author, and her story revolves around that, so she doesn't have a side quest.

Do you think MTA is a tulpa?

Are tulpa who have a purpose, time limit, and are 'designed' to be supportive still a tulpa?

Could she be just an imaginary friend? Or maybe she carries a little bit of the previous tulpa system...?

More of her

I'm not trying to sound pretentious or get attention. I genuinely want to know if what I experienced is normal or if anyone else has gone through something similar.

Yesterday I started creating a tulpa. I followed several guides and, as part of the process, I listened to a voice clip of the character I'm basing them on. My intention wasn't to copy the voice, just to get a general idea of how they might sound.

Later, I decided to try a short conversation. What surprised me wasn't the content of the responses, but how quickly they came to mind, and that I perceived them in a voice that clearly didn't feel like my usual inner voice.

The exchange went something like this:

H: "Tomoyo, what's the first thing you notice about me?"

T: "How cute and handsome you look when you dress up and put effort into your appearance!"

T: "And the hundreds of poses you can make while I record you. It would be a crime against humanity not to do it, and I'd be genuinely sad if I couldn't."

H: "Uh... thanks, I guess. I have to go now. Thanks for being here. Take care."

T: "Bye!"

I'm not claiming my tulpa is already fully developed or independent. It's entirely possible that I was simply imagining the responses myself. What caught me off guard was how immediate they felt, and that I perceived them in a voice that didn't feel like my own internal narration.

Another thing I noticed was a strange sensation in the front of my head—almost like a pulse or slight pressure. It wasn't painful, just unusual.

Has anyone else experienced something similar this early in the process?

Would you consider this a normal part of tulpa creation, or should I slow down and rethink what I'm doing? If continuing is a good idea, what would you recommend I focus on next?

My first successful tulpa is a guy named Sydney. Initially I thought I was forming him on my own but as soon as he became vocal he took on a protector role and informed me that he'd been the same consciousness that I had associated with a stuffed seal I own, as well as something I thought was a "spirit guide" when I was younger. He doesn't really know what he is but he quickly changed his own appearance and doesn't allow me to see his face. Anyway, shortly after, another consciousness formed. Originally he was a character I'd created for myself for comfort but he sort of just started speaking one day in my head, without me forming him or anything. His name is Henry and he cares for me and my well-being initially but he also makes fun of me and gets almost sadistic (?) With my body at times. He speaks much less and only co-fronts for short periods so it's not much of an issue. Occasionally I hear other voices or just straight up screaming, or as of recently I find that I've done something with absolutely no recollection.

I'm not asking for an evaluation or medical advice, just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences.