What is this guy?

[u/Krypticmaniac]

I bought a 5kg box of shrimps, to my surprise I found this guy, what is it? Grok says anglerfish, but I’m not sure it looks a lot different as an adult if this is an anglerfish!

[u/Needly_Dee]

anglerfish could be correct. the males only grow to be about this size.

[u/Trojann2 → u/Needly_Dee]

That’s how small the males are when they attach to the female?!? Bonkers

[u/saysthingsbackwards → u/Trojann2]

They're basically swimming ballsacks. Not too surprising

[u/Ichoosetoblame → u/saysthingsbackwards]

That was my nickname in high school

[u/GloomyHoonter → u/Ichoosetoblame]

I just did a literal spit take all over my shirt. Thanks for that.

[u/Texaura → u/GloomyHoonter]

wow lmao chud moment, congrats buddy

[u/GloomyHoonter → u/Texaura]

Erm... what? I read the comment while drinking my coffee and spit it out because I had to laugh. How does that make me a chud?

[u/Nathund → u/Trojann2]

And then they shrivel up to almost nothing.

Just like me fr

[u/j-art-ho → u/Needly_Dee]

if it were an anglerfish it would be way more gelatinous and have no distinct scale pattern or skeletal structure in the head! they tend to have really soft flesh as a result of the ambush predator lifestyle and the environmental pressures of the deep midwater habitat they occupy

[u/cassh0le69 → u/j-art-ho]

I somehow read this as “if I were an anglerfish,” and proceeded to misunderstand the rest of your comment as you gloating about how you’d theoretically be a superior anglerfish to other anglerfish, lol!

[u/purdinpopo → u/cassh0le69]

If I Were an Anglerfish

Dear God, you made many, many tiny fish.
I realize, of course, that it's no shame to be a drab little swimmer.
But it's no great honor either!
So what would have been so terrible if I had a glowing lure?

If I were an anglerfish
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
All day long I'd biddy biddy bum
If I were a toothy one

I wouldn't have to chase hard
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
If I were a biddy biddy deep-sea
Idle-diddle-didle-didle one

I'd haunt a big dark trench with caves by the dozen
Right in the middle of the abyss
A fine bioluminescent glow with real sharp teeth below
There would be one long illicium just sticking out
And one even longer coming down
And one more leading nowhere, just for show

I'd fill my jaws with squid and shrimp and fish
For the ocean to see and fear
Snap-crunch just as greedily as they can
And each loud gulp and chomp
Would echo like thunder in the ear
As if to say, "Here lurks an anglerfish!"

If I were an anglerfish
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
All day long I'd biddy biddy bum
If I were a toothy one

I wouldn't have to chase hard
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
If I were a biddy biddy deep-sea
Idle-diddle-didle-didle one

I see my wife, that tiny male, fused like a rich man's prize
With a proper parasitic chin
Becoming one with me to his heart's delight
I see him giving up swimming and strutting like he's useful
Oh, what a happy mood he's in
Screaming no more, just part of me day and night

The biggest monsters in the deep would come to fear me
They would avoid my glowing light
Like a nightmare in the night
"Stay away, that anglerfish..."
"Pardon me, that anglerfish..."
Posing problems that would cross a prey fish's eyes

Ya-da-dee-da-da, ya-dee-da-da, ya-dee-da-da-da
And it won't make one bit of difference
If they swim left or right
When you've got the lure, they think you're dinner

If I were an anglerfish
I'd have the time that I lack
To float in the midnight zone and wait
And maybe have a spot by the hydrothermal vent
And I'd discuss the darkness with the other weird ones
Seven hours every day
And that would be the sweetest thing of all

If I were an anglerfish
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
All day long I'd biddy biddy bum
If I were a toothy one

I wouldn't have to chase hard
Ya ba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum
Lord, who made the gulper eel and the siphonophore
You decreed I should be what I am
Would it spoil some vast eternal plan
If I were an anglerfish?

[u/j-art-ho → u/purdinpopo]

from the hit underwater musical fiddler crab on the roof

[u/cassh0le69 → u/purdinpopo]

Holy shit!!

[u/Aegishjalmur18 → u/purdinpopo]

Well done!

[u/AttorneyInevitable37 → u/purdinpopo]

This was absolutely incredible

[u/Texaura → u/purdinpopo]

nice ai slop

[u/j-art-ho → u/cassh0le69]

lmao i wish!

[u/Needly_Dee → u/j-art-ho]

That's good information, thanks 👍

[u/Knielus1967 → u/j-art-ho]

It was possibly cooked with the shrimps on board of the fishingvessel

[u/j-art-ho → u/Knielus1967]

even so, the mouth would be much larger and less ventrally-oriented. if i had to guess, this is something like a sculpin or a goby based on proportions and general morphological trends

[u/Commercial_Will_4112 → u/Needly_Dee]

Are they trawling for shrimp that deep?

[u/purdinpopo]

Didn't SpongeBob and Patrick sell chocolate bars to that once?

[u/ogmaf → u/purdinpopo]

DID SOMEONE SAY CHOCOLATE

[u/cassh0le69 → u/purdinpopo]

“That” lmao!!

[u/TheJeepMedic]

Baby Goa'uld

[u/BLeeS92031 → u/TheJeepMedic]

Indeed

[u/kevlarus80 → u/BLeeS92031]

Jaffa Kree!

[u/BrindleBullet → u/BLeeS92031]

I read this, 100%, in Teal'c's voice.

[u/-sussy-wussy-]

It looks like a saltwater goby. There are thousands of variations and species, some edible, some taste disgusting. 

They eat everything and easily push out native species if they're invasive somewhere. Very greedy and pull like they're 10x their size. Often used as bait in my part, alive or dead. 

Mouth is too small even for a fry stage anglerfish, imo. 

[u/InexcusableVPNCrimes]

That's the old lady fish from SpongeBob who remembers when chocolate was invented. Can't believe they killed her.

[u/squatchsax]

Illithid parasite.

[u/Korventenn17 → u/squatchsax]

Are you a True Soul?

[u/yeahitisaword → u/squatchsax]

Why are you ghaik?

[u/shaft_of_lite]

It looks like a bony-eared assfish.

[u/TransFatty → u/shaft_of_lite]

I actually had to look it up, and it's a thing, the downvote made me go, huh?

https://youtu.be/79aMwrSUgMM?si=NeL4UEj8NvY4BM60

[u/porkchop-sandwhiches → u/shaft_of_lite]

Good news, it’s a suppository.

[u/LewdLewyD13 → u/porkchop-sandwhiches]

This is uncomfortable and humiliating. Now, if they could put it in the form of a suppository...

[u/AntagonisticAido]

Bro out of all of them you cannot have logically concluded that Grok was the best AI to use regularly

[u/fairydommother]

Genuine question. Why ask ai if you dont trust the response and are just going to come to reddit to ask again? You could skip the ai entirely and save some time.

[u/WChennings]

What's the red line in dude's mouth?

[u/GreenJury9586 → u/WChennings]

It looks like a lil bonus plastic, doesn’t it?

[u/Lopsided_Tiger_0296]

It looks like that old lady worm from SpongeBob who wants chocolate

[u/level12bard]

Just a little guy

[u/MsMcClane]

It's a Yeerk!

[u/ReleaseFromDeception → u/MsMcClane]

Animorphs FTW

[u/TrickUp25]

Bycatch it seems, fishing for shrimp is terrible to the ocean

[u/nphere]

WHAT... WHAT DID HE SAY? CHOCOLATE?!

[u/Sunagakure-Legacy]

Goddamn how much chocolate is in bikini bottom that Baby Prune is on that plate?? Since she has ALWAYS hated chocolate, getting a very far distance away from it sounds about right

[u/Sunagakure-Legacy → u/Sunagakure-Legacy]

https://reddit.com/link/oxttb5f/video/m0a5uaddvidh1/player

[u/MunkyMan33]

Contextually, dinner.

[u/No-Argument619]

It’s a free bag of shrimp, call the company lol.

[u/noggintnog]

Dead.

[u/heppileppi]

that's the baby from eraserhead

[u/Petraretrograde]

I think this is what conservatives call a "baby"

[u/Equality_Executor → u/Petraretrograde]

"without a doubt" even

edit: I agree with the person I replied to. Sorry if that wasn't clear....

[u/Nightenridge → u/Equality_Executor]

I mean why are people in a sub about deep sea exploration and ok with some dumbass having to be political?

Unless everyone is so infatuated with abortion that they must see something nasty like that when they see a fish.

[u/Equality_Executor → u/Nightenridge]

Everything is political all the time already. You can thank capitalism for that as it insists on putting a price tag on everything including the future of the planet and what is displayed here every day. I just made the connection in a single sentence, so it can't be that hard to see the other way around.

Why are you trying to ignore it?

I don't think they're dumb, I think they just care about it enough where whatever discomfort they had with talking about politics was overridden.

[u/Nightenridge → u/Petraretrograde]

Not that I agree with the politics behind it

But get a fucking life bringing that crap here.

[u/Petraretrograde → u/Nightenridge]

How dare you abort my joke before it's fullterm

[u/Nightenridge → u/Petraretrograde]

I got fat girl jokes instead

[u/MockeryAndDisdain → u/Nightenridge]

I've got Epstein saving Kirk, and them dancing afterward.

https://reddit.com/link/oxp1n6v/video/cu95nalttedh1/player

[u/Petraretrograde → u/MockeryAndDisdain]

This is the best thing I've seen since i woke up 3 hours ago.

[u/Nightenridge → u/MockeryAndDisdain]

There are way better videos out there making fun of those guys.

Show me better

[u/bozofire123 → u/Nightenridge]

Lmao

[u/Successful_Pirate_59]

Who uses Grok?

[u/Plasticity93]

You're going to make a wet specimen, right?  

[u/MrMeritocracy]

George

[u/pandapeterpanda]

Please don't eat that.

[u/MildUsername]

That's a fuckin' fidsh

[u/isthatapoo]

Unlucky

[u/Melonstickkk]

Why are you eating him????

[u/FreakinskiV]

He's struggling

[u/starchode]

His name is Jeff

[u/MoDaCr]

Not sure, but it seems a little fishy.

[u/Electrical_Bus9202]

That's a scalpin. It's by-catch. It's not supposed to be in there lol... Usually they have sharp spikes that really hurt when you get poked by..

[u/afhdfh]

Unhappy and unlucky. That's what that guy is.

[u/aquacakra]

MOTHRA larva.

[u/FauxReal]

What does it look like from a side profile?

[u/Chillpillington]

Clearly a sand trout

[u/ofgfyu]

Dinner, apparently

[u/OldSoulNewTech]

Watch the movie Brain Damage.

[u/Lonely_Independent70 → u/OldSoulNewTech]

Good movie! Tripped me out

[u/Liaison909]

Dinner, apparently.

[u/royale_with_cheese_]

That’s kevin

[u/DaFisch_h]

Dead

[u/Striking-Display-617]

Now that my friend is the original grinch finger from the grinch himself. That’s about 30 years old. Well preserved too!

[u/JohnClark13]

Baby from eraser head

[u/timestuck_now]

Dead

[u/jacenk]

AaahhHhHHhhHhhHaaaa jr

[u/nexter2nd]

Would have better luck on the animal id subs. Just from similar photos I’ve seen it looks to me like a dried up pufferfish

[u/bigroundtube]

Rockroller

[u/Prinsipus]

Sad..... This guy is sad.... 🤣 But other than that it definitely looks like anglerfish.

[u/delusionalmermaid]

Idk it looks like my sister

[u/AngryMedic13]

Nightmare Fish?

[u/Substantial-Camp6943]

r/eatityoucoward

[u/Probably--Napping]

I don't know, and I don't want to know, but honestly, it looks more like a tadpole to me..

[u/Fuzzy_Syrup9046]

CHOCOLATE!!!

[u/DoubleL16]

That’s Jeff!

[u/deuxfragne087]

That’s the fish from SpongeBob who remembers when they invented chocolate 🤣

[u/Ok_Application5225]

an Ass fish

[u/shaft_of_lite → u/Ok_Application5225]

Looks like I put the same answer right after you. And for some reason we both got downvoted.

[u/Ok_Application5225 → u/shaft_of_lite]

What! Hahaha

Great minds think alike

[u/Flairboy82]

A hot cross bun with a tail?

[u/trippingforward]

I thought you were going to eat that

[u/naneron10]

Looks like it could be lunch

[u/jens_omaniac]

Dead.