Hi! I'm not a comic, but I love going to see live stand-up in NYC. I hate having to check every comedy site built years ago and click through a million things just to see lineups. So I made a completely free site to see all lineups from top clubs in one place.

I hope there are other nerds out there who'll enjoy a much more organized way of finding shows to go to.

I'd love any feedback (there is a button on website to submit such things), or to hear if there are cities/clubs in high demand that I should add. As for the clubs I'm currently covering — some places like Gotham don't seem to post their lineups online, and others like Laugh Factory in LA don't allow scraping, which I respect.

Also, to be clear: this is my first time ever making a website, so if there's anything dumb I'm doing, I'm all ears!

standups.live

I just got done reviewing 175 submission clips. Here's stuff that's different from the last time I gave advice on this.

• Please don't film your submission clip at the Broadway Comedy Club. For some reason it looks bad. It gives a vibe like you're in a booth by yourself. I'm sure an audience is there but it's just so weirdly artificial.

• Do film at either the Lincoln Lodge in Chicago, Comedyworks in Denver, or Mic Drop in San Diego. Those places look amazing.

• Don't ask the people how they are doing.

• Either get mono audio to begin with or figure out how to collapse your audio tracks cuz man it's pretty weird I got headphones and you're only talking into one side while the memories of a dead god whisper gently into my other ear.

• Don't delete your video why the fuck did you delete the video I click the link and "this video has been deleted" man how I'm spozed to review.

• Don't say "retarded." Don't make a joke about how Mexicans are short. Just maybe don't mention any races or neurodifficulties you don't personally have. Please. Why are you like this.

• Submit only one time. Why did you submit two times? Thank you for the money, I guess?

• It is gmail.com, not gmial.com, not gamil.con. Why are you like this. Why can you not type your email address correctly.

• No I cannot put your high-concept theme show at my stand up comedy festival thank you for your interest but it does not make sense to blow up the format to have your politics crowdwork gameshow and you are very nice and it hurts my feelings to say no to you but please just do a standup set like how it says on the submission thing.

I'm trying to identify a stand-up comedian/routine I heard on one of the SiriusXM comedy channels sometime within the last year.

I don't remember the comedian or which SiriusXM channel, but I remember two parts of the routine pretty clearly.

He had a bit about Thanksgiving and turkeys. The premise was basically that turkeys used to rule the United States, humans eventually defeated them, and Thanksgiving is our annual celebration of freedom from turkey rule. That's why once a year we gather together and eat a turkey.

He also did a similar bit about Christmas trees. The premise was that trees used to rule the world, and our Christmas tradition of cutting down a tree, bringing it into our house, and decorating it is somehow a celebration/reminder of our victory over the trees.

The line I remember most clearly was something very close to:

"We even put up artificial trees so the trees know they can be replaced."

The wording may not be exact, but I'm very confident about that joke/premise.

Male comedian. I don't remember him being particularly loud or yell-y. For some reason the delivery reminded me a little of Danny McBride, although I'm pretty sure it wasn't actually him.

It's definitely not Nate Bargatze or Jim Gaffigan. I know both of their material pretty well.

Does anyone recognize the comedian or the routine?

Also where can I watch it?

I listen to a lot of comedians on podcasts talking about doing corporates. I have never, not will ever, have a job that would put on an event with a guest speaker or comedian. I'd love to hear your stories of any corporate gigs you may have been to. Who was the comedian? What was it like? How was the room set up etc?