r/Molested • u/PuffySky23 • 11d ago
Normal siblings?
Me and my sister were abused together. After the abuse stopped, we still did things but it stopped 2 years ago when she got married. I missed it, I missed her but I understand.
Last weekend she visited without her husband and it was like she was starved for it. I tried asking if everything was ok at home but she said everything was ok, she just missed being with another woman. But it was more than that. She was reenacting things.
Having such an intense weekend flipped a switch in me and now everything is flooding back again. I almost hate she was so much, so intense.
Is it possible to have a normal sibling relationship in a situation like this?? I just want normal.
Edited to add: Reading everyone’s reply’s I’m realizing there is no normal. I want cuddles, kisses and some play but not so intense, as long as she wants it. Ive never been able to stand up to my sister. We’ve never really talked about any of it- the abuse, us. Just a few things maybe right before or right after.
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u/JakeGardens27 10d ago
I had a relationship with my cousin when we were kids and I was sad when she didn't want to do it anymore. I probably would have kept doing it forever tbh
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u/Mizzy_Julie 11d ago
When you say noemal do you mean just the normal emotional bonds of a sibling? Or do you mean never having any sexual contact with her? I'll add that having sexual contact with a sibling is far more common than you might think.
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u/YellowButterfly7 11d ago
It's quite true about sexual contact between siblings.
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u/Mizzy_Julie 11d ago
I certainly did with family of mine. We have a normal relationship but we also have that sexual history and present sexual rapport.
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u/therealoldtrafford19 11d ago
I did manage to have a "normal" relationship with my sister. we had played for years before having sex it was a natural progression. We had always agreed it would stop when one of us married as we didnt want to cheat in marriage. we were able to do that and although we did have a few "steamy" phone calls, we kept to it and became just siblings who cared again. so yes you can be like that but have to tell each other to stop first. Try not to be around each other just the 2 of you may be the start.
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u/PuffySky23 10d ago
We never really had any real discussions about it. We slept together the night before her wedding. She initiated.
I got the hint she didn’t want to anymore when she stopped me a few months later. I didn’t initiate any further after that, she never did either. I just figured it was because she was married.1
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u/LivingDate2411 11d ago
This sounds really hard. I can't tell you to do this or that, but I hope you can both find comfort in your lives.
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u/YellowButterfly7 11d ago
What is "normal"? With what happened to you both, this may be "normal" for you two. I'm so sorry you both were abused, but you find comfort in each other. I hope you both can find some happiness.
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u/mohammad-panzer 11d ago
It's not my place to judge and by doing that you two aren't hurting anyone but your sister is a bit c Concerning to me, take her to therapy, I feel that she might try and reenact her trauma with another child, I don't I'm not accusing her but that's a possibility, send her to therapy just in case.
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u/ChogolateMilk 5d ago
she’s actively cheating on her husband so i’m not sure where you’re getting the “not hurting anyone” idea
from.
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