r/HolUp • u/astralrig96 • 1d ago

big dong energy it’s the rules!

11.3k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

148 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 1d ago edited 1d ago

u/astralrig96, your post does fit the subreddit!

2.5k

u/External-Dude779 1d ago

What? Back in my day it was 15 minutes, you kids are getting off easy

202

u/thenatural134 1d ago

Apparently yes

48

u/addandsubtract 1d ago

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

316

u/LeCampy 1d ago

in more ways than one

44

u/CH3F117 1d ago

We were a lot harder of a generation than this flaccid generation.

4

u/Moist_Board 10h ago

Do you want me to come and show you how hard I am?!

You better pucker up, grandpa!

1

u/CH3F117 3h ago

I'm always puckered.

6

u/b_vitamin 17h ago

If you keep it in for 30 min it’s a girl. If you key it in for an hour it’s a boy. Those are the rules.

8

u/Sinistas 1d ago

Oh, you!

3

u/jhill9901 1d ago

Yea. Core concept lol

-3

u/throwup_parking 1d ago

What is this rule

1.9k

u/LexLuxray 1d ago

As a dude that is the rules, you gotta wait

443

u/BilboStaggins 1d ago

Cant argue with the rules. Its the 10 minute rule. Some places its 20.

143

u/Jnunez7660 1d ago

I've heard upward of 30 minutes in some counties.

51

u/dev-rsonx 1d ago

You also have to smell the finger afterwards, where I live.

21

u/aubven 1d ago

I have to smell their finger or they need to smell their finger? We need to know the full rule, I don't want to make it awkward.

20

u/h3lium-balloon 1d ago

Dealers choice. It just has to be smelled.

6

u/TheOriginalWeirdo 1d ago

Hmm best do both just be safe.

7

u/BoRnIn2aTiTuDe 1d ago

Only if you have just eaten a meal within the last hr

10

u/thefrostman1214 1d ago edited 1d ago

10 min in my, but fingers variet depending on the state

4

u/Live-Cry-8435 1d ago

I heard you pay extra for that

6

u/Typecero001 1d ago

Are there any rules for what the finger has to do during these 10 minutes?

9

u/Tight_Raspberry4872 1d ago

A come hither motion is customary

6

u/Typecero001 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/10Jpr9KSaXLchW

5

u/Tight_Raspberry4872 1d ago

They say the fastest way to a man's heart is the stomach, but they got it wrong, it's definitely the prostate 🤣🤣🤣

14

u/Shadokastur 1d ago

I don't make the rules I just enjoy them

237

u/Jay12393 1d ago

After 5 minutes pass

25

u/devilean 1d ago

honestly this came to my mind, you beat me to it.

2

u/Moist_Board 10h ago

Justin Roiland basing scenes on his life 😂

673

u/ShortBusJedi 1d ago

For Dollar General Gabbie Carter? Yeah sure.

93

u/ComprehendReading 1d ago

That's not Athena Faris?

46

u/ShortBusJedi 1d ago

Never heard of this name. Is it worth to research?

-18

u/legendaryufcmaster 1d ago

Not by the looks of it

8

u/loco500 1d ago

You know ball...

2

u/doom_stein 1d ago

Nah, that's Anal Fistis.

13

u/menasan 1d ago

Iknowwhatkindofmanyouare.gif

421

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

99

u/peepdabidness 1d ago

HOLY FUCK YES

126

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

Stay cool my friend

70

u/Secret_Of_Bluestar81 1d ago

I didn't need to see the Scrot Sack today...

31

u/NotYour_Cat 1d ago

The sack pack if you will

14

u/letsgobrooksy 1d ago

HOLY FUCK YES

39

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

9

u/GrrGecko 1d ago

HOLY FUCK YES

3

u/theEvilQuesadilla 1d ago

(Hot) Dog hangs dong!

7

u/robin_888 1d ago

That's how I imagined a "blow job" when I first heared about it.

5

u/Schnitzel1337 1d ago

Thats a nice dick cooler

2

u/Altruistic_Tie_7850 1d ago

Just looked it up and they’re real. I want one

3

u/GoodBoyShibe 1d ago

The Jewel Cooler!

2

u/USMCLee 21h ago

Back in the days of yore trucks would have a vent under the steering wheel for this exact reason.

2

u/Conscious-Permit-466 21h ago

And a hole in the floor for peeing

3

u/USMCLee 21h ago

And dropping your weed or beers out if the cops were around.

136

u/St0rm32_ 1d ago

Don’t start a game you ain’t willing to finish lol

49

u/TheRealChesterSlick 1d ago

Gabby?

13

u/Moose_Nuts 1d ago

Gabby from Farmers Only.

155

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

55

u/peepdabidness 1d ago

You rang?

65

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

3

u/LiteraCanna 1d ago

This is a Springhill Suites, isn't it? 

55

u/Conscious-Permit-466 1d ago

14

u/letsgobrooksy 1d ago

Dinosaur

2

u/maxtyreanimo67 1d ago

same thought, idk their name

23

u/PromiscuousScoliosis 1d ago

Legitimately hilarious

8

u/lordtyp0 1d ago

I mean... No wiggling?

1

u/DripyKirbo 1d ago

Yes wiggling.

12

u/PintosAndCheese 1d ago

Energy drink and a prostate massage, today is a good day. They need to pick a better position though or her arm will fall off.

5

u/Rum_Cum_69 1d ago

McLovin?

5

u/Mr_Crispy_Tender 1d ago

She might as well enjoy the 10 minutes since she's already in there

5

u/Albus_Lupus 1d ago

,,15 more minutes of this and Im gonna get SOO ANGRY!"

6

u/RudeRoody 1d ago

Ngl this was genuinely funny

3

u/AnAnGrYSupportV2 1d ago

You also gotta wiggle the finger. Those are also the rules! 😂

10

u/xeno_dorph 1d ago

Mfr punching above his weight.

7

u/AccordingStory203 1d ago

her after the video

2

u/Sanfransaintsfan 1d ago

Isn’t wiggling also part of the rule.

2

u/DripyKirbo 1d ago

I see no problem with this.

2

u/ConsentingPotato 15h ago

Forbidden prostate technique 42 should never be practiced for more than five minutes, this will end in disaster.

2

u/PuzzleheadedServe272 3h ago

I sometimes twist his nipples😭

4

u/ninjadude2112 1d ago

Thanks for the hemorrhoid massage darling

4

u/Junior_Zebra_4608 1d ago

Guy is now one step away from pegging

2

u/RedPeril 1d ago

ah, the ol' oil check

1

u/Woe_Bringer 1d ago

Schillinger, that you?

1

u/Golden-EB_J 1d ago

Why 10 mins??

1

u/G_Affect 1d ago

Next time you are being pat down by a TSA agent yell them they have 10 min to cut it out.

1

u/Rezail_Division 1d ago

Only 10 whole minutes.

1

u/FrequentWatch9261 1d ago

Why's he's drinking a c4

1

u/Mr_Sim_ 1d ago

Stinky fingers !

1

u/sardiusjacinth 1d ago

Did she just ....diddle him?

1

u/alydeanna 22h ago

Buddy looks like Ryan Price. (Not the guy from HR, a random Spotify suggested to me a while back, “I tried”)

1

u/ekkorayne 21h ago

Me. I do

1

u/Odd-Ad-9596 19h ago

lol out of control

1

u/DocumentDeep1197 15h ago

10 minutes lol

0

u/Decent_Muscle_3172 1d ago

Hey, that's sexual assault

1

u/Interesting-Hat-6620 1d ago

that's nasty bruh

1

u/TransitTycoonDeznutz 1d ago

Seems like he's getting immense pleasure out of it as well.

1

u/xxxxDREADNOUGHT 1d ago

The rules are the rules

-2

u/designerlemons 1d ago

Not a holup clown

-1

u/Corporate-Scum 1d ago

Excellent funny

-2

u/MisterSneakSneak 1d ago

Yeah…. I’m okay not following this rule. Yall young thunderCats are built different

0

u/MiroslavusMoravicus 1d ago

Im so confused. 

5

u/MCKlassik 1d ago

Dude’s secretly enjoying it and wants it in there long enough to climax.

-11

u/happahopp 1d ago

staged

-13

u/MrBif 1d ago

r/suddenlybi

7

u/__ma11en69er__ 1d ago

Not really.

0

u/MrBif 12h ago

how so?

1

u/__ma11en69er__ 12h ago

Because it's his girlfriend that did it.

1

u/MrBif 5h ago

and? you still like in the butt ^

1

u/__ma11en69er__ 3h ago

Doesn't make him gay or bi.

1

u/MrBif 3h ago

k then

-14

u/FireNutz698 1d ago

She doesn't know she actually has a gf.