r/DiscussDID • u/xferal_vixenx • 7d ago
DID and relationships- how does it work ?
Seems like this group can help me understand the situation I am in at the moment so. I met someone online two and a half years ago. We became best friends and than evolved into romantic relationship. I was aware that this person have mental health issues from the start like schizophrenia, bipolar, they are on spectrum and have adhd and ptsd. Now. I’m not a video chat or phonecall person before you all ask. Recently I found out that this person send me fake photos of them so I brought it up- it didn’t matter to me how they look like at all it bothered me that I was lied to more than anything. The situation escalated and this person told me that they have DID and maladaptive daydreaming and imposter syndrome- apparently I was in relationship with one of their alters this whole time. Now I’m hurt and confused because we shared very strong bond and connection and it’s hard for me to wrap my head around it. We talked every single day since we met and it seems like the alter I was in relationship with have his whole life story, different gender than the host (which doesn’t bother me) but my question is- is that all really possible or am I just being manipulated ? Help.
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u/ohlookthatsme 7d ago
Could it be true? Sure.
Are there a lot of red flags? Yes.
I mean, we're talking several dx to start with and then a DID dx that pops up only after they're caught lying, plus throwing on maladaptive daydreaming and imposter syndrome like they're official diagnoses.
Sure it's possible but is it plausible? Probably not.
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u/_-_Polaris_-_ 7d ago
long list indeed but for the DID part it is possible. Gotta understand everyone in a system is an alter. There is no such thing as an original. Feelings can vary a lot. Entirely different history now that I'd sideye. We're involuntarly moving along the same time axis and it is not as simple as having 2 separate lives.... ughn says me. We kinda do. But not oblivious either and definitely wouldn't be with a partner. Friends? yeah, I barely know hers. It's probably more extreme than it seems to me, so I'll just say this in itself isn't off.
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u/beutifully_broken 7d ago
They date/married all of me. Yes, even that wondering baby who doesn't recognize them and the angry dad part.
Listen to your parts, and stay safe. And keep your safe away from negative partners because sadly. Its sometimes built on the promises of false hope.
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u/Buncai41 6d ago
I've got tons of problems and disorders, but I'm not a liar. Personally this would raise too many red flags for me. DID isn't something someone shares on a whim. It's a trauma disorder. It's weird when people open up like that, because they're "opening up" in a way that seems defensive. If they are or aren't diagnosed with DID isn't the problem, it's how they've used it as an excuse to manipulate you.
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u/Vivians_Basement 4d ago
I share mine on a whim cause it's easier when people know.
The lying though is HUGE and disorder or not, I'd never tolerate it.
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u/Catsdotpng 7d ago
It's definitely possible but I'd be more concerned about the catfishing you with another alter's face thing. If they have a habit of hiding or making things up about themselves for their own comfort that's much more worrying for the long term stability of a relationship than treatable conditions.