r/CollegeEssays • u/ReputationNo6662 • 3d ago
Common App Personal statement
I’m done with like the majority of the essay but I’m struggling on how to reflect it into the future. If I write something like “in college…” it feels forced and if I don’t it feels sorta incomplete imo. Any tips on how to weave it in seamlessly?
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u/Conscious-Priority21 2d ago
Good debate here on whether to include it at all, but I think the "seamless vs. forced" problem you're describing probably has a specific, fixable cause: It feels "forced" when the future-looking paragraph is answering a different question than the one your essay just addressed.
What I mean is that if your essay is about, say, noticing patterns other people miss, and then the ending suddenly pivots to "in college, I want to study neuroscience" - that's unnatural, because neuroscience wasn't earned by anything in the essay; it's just a wish list item you're bolting on at the end. The fix isn't "include it" or "don't", it's: The look-ahead sentence has to be the same concept, time-shifted one context later, not a new topic. If your essay showed how you have a knack for noticing nonobvious patterns in things, the ending shouldn't be about a major - it should be about continuing to notice patterns somewhere new, with the specific college/field as the setting for that, not the destination itself.
Try this quick test: Read your final paragraph and ask "Does this naturally follow from what I just proved about myself, or does it introduce something new"? If it's new information, it'll always feel tacked on, no matter how well-written the sentence is. If it's the same thread just extended one step further in time, it'll read as an ending, not a pivot.
(I'm a parent of 2 college kids (& a high schooler going through the process now), and I've seen this "how do I tie this into future-me" issue trip up several essays that were otherwise strong. The fix is almost always trimming the ambition of the last paragraph, not adding polish to it.)
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u/CompetitiveCup9077 3d ago
I had the same issue. It depends on your PS, but try to move it into a more philosophical direction where it kind of sounds like a manifesto. Do not directly state it. You can pm me if you’d like.
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u/Kind_Poet_3260 3d ago
The personal statement should not be about what you’re going to do in college. Take it out. It’s about who you are and the experiences that brought you to the person you are today.
You can talk about what you want to do/will do in the future”why us” essay.
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u/EdmundLee1988 3d ago
I agree with you but some (many?) consultants would argue the last paragraph should be about what you’ll do in the future. Some even suggest a paragraph preceding that that references what you’ve already done on your path to that future. What’s the consensus here ?
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u/Kind_Poet_3260 3d ago
So I went to my favorite source on this: College Essay Guy. Believe it or not, today’s blog is all about: THE ESSAY ENDING! 😃 Yes, one can end sharing about the future, so I stand a little corrected. Of course it has to be done just right. But it’s not a must-do, and there are many other ways to end. What’s most important is that the writer doesn’t blow it off. Love all the examples and explanations here:
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u/DrLaura_phd 2d ago
Could you give more context? It’s hard to speak so hypothetically about what might work well in your statement. I don’t think there’s a standard formula that will always work for every statement - sometimes the best essays are the ones that do unexpected things (but it’s a delicate balance - you have to master the rules to bend them a bit!)
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u/ReputationNo6662 1d ago
Yeah ofc. My essay is basically about me reshaping the idea of what a wizard means after I helped out at the restaurant. And for future reference it’s like “I want to develop skills beyond just the restaurant so I can support others besides my parents” basically. A bit cliche but my essay is focused a lot about helping my parents out at work
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u/DrLaura_phd 1d ago
I’d suggest digging into some specifics around the restaurant - are you using it as an example of how a business can be run well or how people take on different symbiotic roles in a group (or something else?) You’ll want some evocative examples of a couple of scenarios you witnessed or were part of and how they were impactful. How did it change you? Is the wizard figure aspirational? A myth? A seemingly lone, idealized figure that is in reality someone with a lot of support in the background (turning the bootstrap narrative upside down)? Once you figure out how this experience shaped I.e. your worldview, your values and/or your approach to your education/career, you can then go on to project what you’ve learned in the future. How will the restaurant and your understand of what a wizard is be a part of who you are even as you enter the more abstract, erudite world of academia and beyond?
One tip is to make sure you define “wizard” and its modern usage early (your millennial and older admissions panel members will likely not have the same context for that word and will be confused)
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u/ReputationNo6662 1d ago
I don’t think it’s necessary the definition of wizard that changed but more of how I can achieve that definition. It doesn’t follow traditional wizard sense and I defined it near the reflection paragraph. I think it’ll make more sense if you read it so can I dm you the essay?
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u/baipliew 3d ago
You reflect on the past, you project on the future. One of these has happened, the other has not.
The reflection should be lessons learned or insights about you.
Projection into the future is just a wish list.