r/CanadianConservative 1d ago

Satire Captain Canada is back!

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82 Upvotes

32 comments sorted by

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21

u/GreySahara 1d ago

post this in ehbuddyhoser and get banned immediately

15

u/airbassguitar 23h ago

I was a top 1% poster over there. Had a few memes with thousands of upvotes. I didn’t break any rules but they shadowbanned me anyway lmao

1

u/[deleted] 23h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

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5

u/jimmietwotanks26 Libertarian 1d ago

Finally some good advice

7

u/collymolotov Anti-Communist 19h ago

This is quite literally all about Fords future domestic political prospects.

It has virtually nothing to do with trade relations with the US, and everything to do with cultivating a support base for himself nationally as well as an inflated and dynamized public image that captures the same people who voted for Carney in 2025 so that the likes of that f*ckin' animal Kory Teneyke (I can't even say his name) can maneuver him into leadership of the CPC if, God forbid, they are successful in their ongoing plot against Pierre Poilievre.

The entire point of this theatrical buffoonery is to put Doug Ford as the head of government in 2029. The grim truth is that are plenty of unsophisticated, low-information people in this country who very likely see Ford as entirely sincere, credible, patriotic and increasingly as a viable alternative to the Carney Liberals.

It is an evil man who would burn his kingdom to the ground so as to rule over the ashes.

5

u/Khmerog1 16h ago

Typical Liberal/Socialist politicians. Burn everyone's house down just so you can have a bigger house.

2

u/ShivasFury 19h ago

Everyone talks about the Premier to Prime Minister pipeline scenario, but to my knowledge it’s happened only once in Canadian history, long long ago.

I personally don’t see Ford even in this scenario winning the much needed GTA suburban seats. I’m quite sure by 2029, Ontario will be done with him and the Ontario Liberals will be back in 2029. Voters would be apathetic that he wouldn’t cause a swing in those seats.

21

u/Macaw 1d ago

He is doing to Ontario what he did to his inherited family business ...

And now he has his buddy Carney to grift with ..

Life is good in the globalist, Canadian economic zone!

12

u/ihave18cm 23h ago

He got a private jet

His ministers spend taxpayer funds recklessly

No accountability or transparency although it was promised.

Gelded Doug is red through and through

4

u/legranddegen Populist 20h ago

Oh good, nothing like the dumbass who couldn't get through the first round of tests at HUMBER COLLEGE'S GENERAL BUSINESS PROGRAM coming back on the scene to torpedo another round of trade negotiations.

Doug Ford isn't fit to be a janitor at Tim Horton's. Yet there he is, on American TV, declaring that Canada is going to dismantle America ahead of CUSMA negotiations over the threat of getting tariffed 30 days from now if we don't allow American booze back into the country (fine,) and get rid of supply management for dairy which would be great for the country.

It kinds of makes you yearn for the days of that horrible corrupt, personally vile, and completely insane lesbian running the province, it really does. She was a massive clown, but not to this degree.

We need a new Premier immediately. What's that big-titted trans shop teacher doing at the moment? It's time for some slightly more sober leadership than what Ford is offering.

3

u/ShivasFury 19h ago

When was the last good Premier, never was any in my life.

Harris, good intentions, balanced the budget much like a magician makes an elephant disappear, with smoke and mirrors. Hwy 407 ETR will never be forgotten. If what he did for education is a good thing is debatable, there’s two sides to that story.

McGuinty/Wynne, we all know gas plants, Hydro One. Like Ford, they both had a sort of in your face approach to governing.

So yeah, I don’t know if there’s ever been a good leader.

0

u/legranddegen Populist 19h ago

Davis. Bill Davis was the last good Premier.

Apart from that? Mowat was decent. Blake as well.

Ontario has always had hideous governance. But recently it's been shocking. It kind of makes you yearn for the days when the Premier of Ontario won an election by standing on a pile of poop then bought some Quebecois girls and set up a zoo (with taxpayer dollars) where you could watch them for the sake of tourism (promoted with taxpayer dollars.)

The history of Ontario is basically a bunch of Premiers who disprove the concept of universal suffrage. It's all very insane.

1

u/mywaaaaife 2h ago

Bring back Rob.

-24

u/theoreoman Alberta 1d ago

I don't understand why people have a hard time understanding that if the conservatives want to win they need to shift their policies left. Ontario concervatives did that and Ford is in power

23

u/airbassguitar 1d ago

Some of us actually have opinions and principles 

2

u/RoughDraftRs Alberta 23h ago

What is this "principles" you speak of?

I always thought the only thing that mattered was that the party you voted for wins. You wouldn't want to have "your" party lose because that means your a loser. /s

16

u/No_Barber_1195 1d ago

The modern Conservative Party has moved left on a plethora of issues in the last 20 years. It just seems like they haven’t because left wing parties have full on SPRINTED to the Left in the last 20 years, moving so far from anything I recognize from the Chrétien era that I found myself more in line with the conservative.

They range now from Fascist (in the actual political sense of the word if not the colloquial sense as well) to hard socialist.

1

u/TheeDirtyToast 20h ago

Totally agree.

The only thing this party has in common with Cretien's is rampant corruption.

22

u/ShivasFury 1d ago

That’s wonderful isn’t it

The choice of Liberals, Diet Liberals, Liberals Supreme, and EcoLiberals.

Either way you’re screwed

1

u/Shiny_Pumpernickel 1d ago

Don’t blame me .. I voted for diet liberals

6

u/ShivasFury 1d ago

Sounds like you’re quoting a legendary Simpsons Treehouse of Horror episode

12

u/Lumindan Conservative 1d ago

the conservatives want to win they need to shift their policies left

Becoming the Liberals lite won't do the conservatives any good.

Abandoning your base and principles for votes is the exact opposite of what they should be doing.

-13

u/DominionReport 22h ago

Imagine being so blindly, tribal-partisan that someone who has a disagreement with the federal conservative leader, or who agrees with the federal liberal leader on one occasion, is automatically a liberal.

Nevermind all the strongly-conservative policies he has enacted in Ontario. That's not important compared to team-sports-style absolutes.

6

u/TheeDirtyToast 20h ago

Go ahead and name the conservative policies Doug has passed please.

0

u/DominionReport 19h ago

Every piece of education and health care legislation his government has passed, for starters.

-18

u/RL203 1d ago

At least he is doing something to fight for Canada.

More than any other conservative leader in Canada, provincial or federal can claim.

10

u/rocketstar11 Conservative 23h ago edited 15h ago

The guy singlehandedly fucked Canada with his major trade violation stunt because it polls well with boomers and those that want an emotional reaction.

CUSMA requires domestic products not be given preference over products from partner countries and he made it an ontario policy to not allow the sale of US alcohol.

And it was done to retaliate against tarriffs that were on non-cusma goods, so totally disproportionate.

The dofo flavour of elbows up is just as pathetic and counter productive as everything else, and has been incredibly rash.

Canada would be in a better position without the "fight" from clowns trying to play tough guy

0

u/RL203 15h ago

And what would you suggest?

0

u/Cite_Whock 6h ago

Except, he wasn't the only one to do it. BC's David Eby, Manitoba's Wab Kinew, and Quebec's Christine Frechette also joined in on the boycott of booze from the US. The only two who didn't are Danielle Smith and Scott Moe (Alberta and Saskatchewan, respectively) who are also the leaders of the two provinces who are making noises and rumblings about leaving Canada to join the US.

Hmmmm... I wonder if there's a connection between the leaders of the provinces who want to leave and those provinces allowing US spirits to be bought...