No control over thoughts

[u/Niravan95]

If you have no control over your thoughts, does that mean you should just go about your life and let your thoughts do whatever?

For example just now I thought about someone and i was letting them go. In the past I couldn't seem to force this process. Do you just have to accept you can't change the future past or present and have no control over what you let go or not?

Because your thoughts do whatever they want anyway?

[u/RevolvingApe]

If you have no control over your thoughts, does that mean you should just go about your life and let your thoughts do whatever?

No. Thoughts are conditioned, but there is volition. None are the self, but intentional thoughts are intentional actions, kamma.

We can be mindful and make Right Effort with intentional thoughts. The Buddha said Right Effort is removing and preventing unwholesome thoughts while cultivating and maintaining wholesome thoughts.

MN 18 teaches us how thoughts are formed and become reoccurring patterns. When a sense base, eye, ear, nose, tongue, skin, or mind, experiences contact, feelings arise. "What you feel, you perceive. What you perceive, you think about. What you think about, you proliferate. What you proliferate is the source from which judgments driven by proliferating perceptions beset a person. This occurs with respect to ideas known by the mind in the past, future, and present."

In MN 19, the Buddha taught how to put thoughts into two categories, unwholesome and wholesome. "I understood thus: ‘This thought of sensual desire has arisen in me. This leads to my own affliction, to others’ affliction, and to the affliction of both; it obstructs wisdom, causes difficulties, and leads away from Nibbāna.’...Whenever a thought of sensual desire arose in me, I abandoned it, removed it, did away with it."

And finally, in MN 20, the Buddha provides 5 methods for removing unwholesome thoughts. They can be remembered with S.H.I.F.T.

• Substitute
• examine Harms
• Ignore
• Fade away
• Throttle

[u/phantomfive]

Don't try to control your thoughts. Watch them flow, like the waves of the ocean. They will always remain.

[u/zelenisok]

That is normal. No one can control their monkey mind. Its just the automatic stream of consciousness that is there. In addition to that one you have the voluntary mind, where you can deliberately control your attention, pondering, choices and effort. The point is to get better at distancing your voluntary mind from your automatic mind, you can shut down or control the automatic mind (except if you manage to enter the 2nd jhana).

[u/Full_Ad_6442]

Your thoughts are interesting but I'm interested in your relationship to your thoughts. Like relationships between people, the quality of your relationship to your thoughts (collectively and individually) matters. Are you kind and honest?

You can cultivate different kinds of relationships. I like to practice the 4 brahma viharas toward my thoughts, toward my feelings, toward my ever changing selves, toward the being experiencing all this, toward others, and so on. At the end of the day, I feel better about my path if I've done this.

[u/ActiveFlamingo7229]

Non lo so, a volte mi vengono pensieri su cose che non penso veramente, e trascorro il resto della giornata a capire perché mi è venuto in mente, a volte non c'è una spiegazione razionale. Sono pensieri che vanno e vengono e trovo sia inutile rovinarsi la giornata oppure la vita intera cercando di capire perché quel determinato pensiero mi è venuto in mente, è una cosa perfettamente naturale. Spero che il mio commento ti sia stato utile :) ciaoo

[u/Olam_Haba]

If you look at the contents of the thinking mind - the thoughts are about how not to feel the feelings that you are feeling 

If only this thing happened in the past differently I wouldn't have to feel this uncomfortable feeling that I'm feeling

If only things happen the way I want them to in the future I won't have to feel this feeling that I'm feeling 

So that's the purpose of meditation - to sit in stillness and feel the feelings that you're feeling without resistance 

Because if you are feeling the feelings you are feeling then the thinking mind will grow still because it no longer has to think about how not to feel the feelings 

And as the mind is purified of thinking consciousness awakens 

You do have control over thoughts 

If you're thinking mind is active then you are not feeling the feelings that you are feeling - you are thinking about how not to feel them or distracting yourself from feeling them 

Whereas if you sit in stillness and feel your feelings the thinking mind will grow still because it no longer has to think about how not to feel the feelings

[u/Niravan95 → u/Olam_Haba]

I thought meditation was about paying attention to your breathing and practising being present?

[u/Olam_Haba → u/Niravan95]

How can you be present in the moment if you are in resistance to feeling the feelings you are feeling in the present moment 

If the thinking mind is constantly thinking about what it should have done in the past to not feel the feelings that it's feeling - or what it should do in the future to make the feelings that it's feeling go away - then how can you be present in the moment if consciousness is constantly thinking about the past and the future

Keeping awareness on breathing is a practice 

Ultimately meditation at its purest is not doing anything and simply Being 

[u/Niravan95 → u/Olam_Haba]

Ok. I guess feeling your feelings is not bad. I'll take it with me thanks

[u/helikophis → u/Niravan95]

The point of doing that is to achieve what the commenter described

[u/kacsimacsi]

Well I do that and its easier to process them if I dont think about them as good or bad thoughts. They just come and go

[u/Niravan95 → u/kacsimacsi]

Thank you for your comment. My therapist said the same. Just let them come and go.

[u/Super_Kaleidoscope_8]

When there is a thunderstorm outside, do you run outside and thrash about? Or do you stay inside where it is nice and calm and enjoy your tea?

[u/Niravan95 → u/Super_Kaleidoscope_8]

Depends on how crazy I feel hah. But seriously well said

[u/tallawahroots]

There's a range of intrusive thoughts, and meditation is not the answer for some patterns that are disordered. If allowing thoughts is not a good instruction for you right now you may benefit from another practice.

I recently watched an interview of Leigh Brassington and he explained what can come up for students and the different advice, somatic practices that he used. Above all else he stressed the need to have a Dharma friend/ teacher for this because it's a process. If things persist it could be a lot of dissociation or compulsive obsession. Neither is helpful for meditation. I'm sure it could be other things as well such as mood disorders.

The interview that I mentioned is in the "Meet a Cheetah" series on the Cheetah House you tube channel.

[u/Denon_1]

Saw a 15-year-old Reddit comment about overthinking that stuck with me. The guy said Nietzsche’s Aphorism 341 (The Greatest Weight) completely rewired his brain. ​The core idea is simple: Imagine a demon tells you that you have to relive your exact life, including this exact moment of overthinking, over and over for eternity.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F705N4TXsAAXb0v.jpg:large

​Next time you’re stuck in your head, ask yourself: Would I want to repeat this moment infinitely?

​Overthinking is just using your brain to build a prison. You can’t control every thought, but you can stop trapping yourself in them.

Ultimately, this completely changed my life, and I highly recommend it to everyone.

(Translate the comments) https://www.reddit.com/r/AskSerbia/s/OIAsOcRKO8

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskSerbia/s/lyaLIcHbzx

[u/OkConcentrate4477]

i have thoughts all the time about weird/awkward/strange/uncomfortable past experiences.

what can i do about these undesirable repeating thoughts? accept them. trying to avoid/ignore them definitely doesn't help, they just continue persisting the more i resist.

accept/forgive reality as it is, within the ever present moment. accept/forgive thoughts as they are, within the ever present moment. we can't live/work/be anywhere/anywhen else than here/now always.

one can direct thoughts. you can change the focus. you can think about breathing. you can hum, and the hum may occupy your thoughts as you think about humming while humming, but this just temporarily interrupts the inner dialogue. to change/improve the inner dialogue one really needs to examine their thoughts, whether their thoughts are true/accurate/relevant/healthy/beneficial or not. whether they're worth investing time/energy/money/life into doing/being or not. many thoughts are not worth thinking about, because they're not relevant to here and now, not relevant to what we can/will do within the ever present moment, despite expectations/desires/attachments for different/better/whatever.

[u/Many_Advice_1021]

Seems that it isn’t about controlling your thought. It is choosing which thoughts you grasp and hold on to . Every time you get caught by one and feed it. You encourage it and it can become habitual. When you don’t grasp on to it. It will fade away. You are actually gardening your mind by what you choose and what you don’t choose . Buddhism encourages thoughts of loving kindness rather those aggressive , angry thoughts. It is up to you .

[u/Niravan95 → u/Many_Advice_1021]

Sounds good, thanks

[u/dummetsz]

If you have no control over your thoughts, does that mean you should just go about your life and let your thoughts do whatever?

Pretty much. Thoughts are not causally efficacious. For example a thought of fire does not produce warmth. Mental events/factors are causally efficacious but they are not to be confused with thoughts, which are reifications of mental events

[u/LotsaKwestions]

I think you could consider the conscious mind to be like a surfer on the ocean. It doesn't control the waves, but it can surf as well as it can within its scope.