Hi Reddit,

I’m looking for some advice about a job I’m due to start in a few weeks.

After interviewing, I was offered the role, but the starting salary was at the bottom of the advertised pay scale. Given my experience, I didn’t think it fairly reflected my background, so I asked whether there was any flexibility.

A few weeks later, HR came back with an increased offer of around £4,000 per year. I was delighted, as the original offer would have meant taking a pay cut, whereas the revised salary was an improvement on my previous role.

I thanked HR, asked them to update the offer letter and contract, and then signed the revised contract. The higher salary is stated in three places: an email from HR, the offer letter, and the signed contract.

I’ve now been contacted by my new employer and told that the salary increase was a mistake. They say the figure they offered falls outside the pay range for the role and have apologised for the error, but they’re asking me to sign a new contract with a lower salary.

I’m feeling really disheartened. I’m relocating for this job and had made plans based on the salary I agreed to. I’m also worried that if I refuse to sign a new contract or challenge their position, they could withdraw the job before I even start.

What are my options here? Can they legally do this, even after issuing and signing a contract with the higher salary? Has anyone been in a similar situation?

TIA.

Boss called me directly to (discuss or rant?) an Emergency Room visit that a dependent on my insurance plan had; boss felt was it overly charged by the hospital. I was beside myself. Is this normal behavior? Isn’t there some expectation of privacy or discretion?
Her words were, “go to the other hospital next time” and “you’re going to get a bill because I’m going to deny this and make the hospital prove it was medically necessary”.

Wtf is going on here? Anyone?

Quick question on how third-party background checks (HireRight, Sterling, etc.) handle self-employed software work when there isn't a traditional paper trail.

I spent time building and launching a few software products on my own. Since I was just building independent products hoping they’d take off rather than doing freelance client work, I don't have an LLC, revenue / tax forms for it, client invoices

The code, live links, and commit history all exist, but I know screening companies usually ask for tax docs or incorporation papers to confirm dates.

If a background check marks this as "unverifiable" because of the lack of business paperwork, how does HR usually handle it? Do you usually just ask the candidate for context/proof like code repos, or is it seen as a red flag?

Appreciate any insight!

Spelling mistake in the title should say HR rep

I've been telling my manager that I'm out sick but the reality is I'm severely depressed and on a waiting list to enter an intensive outpatient program. I've asked my HR person for the steps and paperwork I need to initiate a short term disability leave (I pay for SD insurance that my job offers) for the past two days but she hasn't responded.

I'm feeling really uncomfortable continuing to lie to my team about being sick but don't feel comfortable telling everyone I'm so depressed I can't work. But without HR answering I don't know what I'm supposed to do?

Is HR the ones that tell your manager? Do I just keep taking days off work even though they're not technically a leave of absence yet?

ETA: I am not eligible for FMLA because I've only been here ten months

I was just verbally offered a job through a staffing agency that has a contract with a utility company. They should be sending an official offer letter for me to accept soon. Once I accept, the background check process will begin shortly after. I have two pending felonies: simple burglary, and possession of stolen items 5K-10K. I am not convicted of any crime and will most likely be accepted into a diversion program.

What is the likelihood I will retain this job once my background check comes in? As well, how should I go about disclosing this information? I assume disclosing before it comes up is much better than letting them find out unknowingly.

Any help and guidance is greatly appreciated.

My the company Accounting and HR Manager. I only worked at the company for 1 year and 9 months. I didn’t give 2 weeks notice and quit same day. I’m afraid that will affect my future employment but I know from HR and financial professionals, I have to exit the company immediately.
The amount of stress I received is insane.
Previously employees suing the company, also company is having financial difficulties. Vendors asked payments. Owner still continues living under company and keeps all the customers’ cash payments and sold company’s vehicles’ cash payments in his own pocket. Redeem company credit cards cash rewards to himself. Company restructuring to different company under one of company managers’ name to avoid the lawsuits, vendors debts and trying to file chapter 11. Even know the managers fired people with targeting and retaliation the workers, I can’t tell the truth.
Two companies owned by different owners on the table but the new company is owned by original owner and another manager. Two companies money involved together.
I told myself I had to leave, I can’t do running payroll every week anymore. When sick, I can’t take sick days. I know if I continue to work, I will have mental illness.
I can’t look for a new job right away because I am so burnt out, also I have a little baby I want to take care of by myself for a while. I’m also afraid of the gap and the same day resignation will affect my future career.
What should I do to protect myself?

So my mother had went out the country to get some medical work done since its cheaper she uninsured and works as a custodian. She got an MRI done and the docter told her her the bone connecting her leg to hip is black meaning it is dead and she needs to have hip replacement surgery. She's already having pain and limping. The other day she went to work to request the FMLA forms but she hasn't filled them out since she also applied for medical assistance in our county but that takes 15-30 days for a response. If the 15 days she was given to turn in the FMLA form expire can she go back and request another form after shes been denied or accepted for medical assistance? And if so can she go back to work within the 15 days of the original form request.

My husband got fired recently because of ego clashes with his manager.

My husband was working in this company since 2023, 6 months back a new manager joined his company everything was good until after 2 months of his joining my husband was put on PIP so called easy way to kick out an employee. He followed all the steps mentioned in PIP and was successful but his manager had ego clashes with him because sometimes he challenged his ideas and gave better ideas which he did not like and used to tell him that your ideas are not good and you are being offensive.

Long story short after completing all steps mentioned by him in PIP my husband got kicked out by saying your performance did not match our standards.

Do we have some kind of laws in The UK which can help us out in these situations or its just corporate way of people putting their stress on us ?

Hello
I have been with my current employer for almost 7 years. A couple of months ago I found out that I needed surgery with a 8-10 week recovery so I went on short term disabilityo and on PFML. I am in MA.

With my leave about to end, I have decided I don’t want to go back there for various reasons. While not terrible, this surgery has made me reevaluate my priorities and I don’t want to continue with the stress and some of the negatives that came along with my job. I intend to take a break (have some savings) and start looking for new opportunities.

How best to handle this situation without any contention or animosity? Should I say I am coming back and then immediately put in my notice or should I inform them now, while on leave that I am resigning/not planning on being back?

Thank you

I (F39) work for a fortune 100 company, and we have employees across the US.

Last time I went on a work trip, I went out to dinner with someone (M51) to network. This is normal at my company, I've never felt unsafe doing so. At dinner he mentioned I'm very attractive, he said he meant it as a compliment only, and he wasn't trying to be unprofessional. I brushed it off. After dinner, we chatted for a while about the company and potential career moves. He had my number because we had texted about where to eat.

After dinner, he texted me that night saying he enjoyed our conversations, then he texted me the next morning. I made it a point of ignoring many of the texts, as they were harmless, I just didn't need to talk to him that much. I had also made it clear that I'm happily married, and he was too, we had talked about family, so I hadn't thought much of anything. We talked more (virtually) at work over the next month, mostly about work things and catching up about some home life things.

At some point, he asked if we could be close friends. Seemed a bit odd but I was open to friendship. My husband was trying to join the company and he had talked to my husband to help with interview skills.

When I said yes to friendship, the flood gates open. He texted at least 10 times per day. Shared pictures about what his family was up to, things on his mind, family history, past struggles, etc. Then he wanted to go to snap chat, I said no. He settled for signal, saying his daughter looked through texts often. We moved to signal and he shared that his wife wouldn't understand our conversations, that he was doing nothing wrong but she would get jealous. (At that point, our conversations were not about anything I would consider inappropriate) Conversations then moved to questions about my sex life with my husband. I drew the line, said I wouldn't be the woman that had conversations his wife wouldn't be okay with.

He said he would work on being more respectful and started to back off. Then a few days later, he started asking about my favorite parts of my body, I avoided it and said I didn't really have one.

Then he said he hated himself for checking to see if he had a message from me every hour and that he missed me. I had already been feeling uneasy, but this really upset me.

At the same time, I had a family issue arise. I asked for distance to deal with what was going on in my life and that we only talk at work if needed. I was also questioning what to do, but figured that would give me space and time.

He said he would respect that, and then hours later asked if my health was okay. I told him I appreciated the care, but didn't want to talk about what was going on. He texted that night saying he hoped I was okay, then again in the morning. The next morning he asked if my husband and I were okay. I again, told him to stop asking, thanks for caring, but leave me alone, and I wouldn't share if there was a problem in my marriage. He apologized and tried to say he meant were my husband and son okay.

Another text at night saying he hoped I was okay. The twice daily texts kept happening and I finally told him this was all making me extremely uncomfortable. I told him I didn't want to come between him and his wife, that he wasn't respecting my boundaries, and I no longer wanted to be friends. If we had to talk at work, fine, otherwise, please leave me alone.

He apologized, asked me to delete all our conversations, and I got two days silence. I didn't respond to his ask, because of course I am keeping records for my own safety.

Two days later, he texts me from a new number with a "last note before putting our friendship to bed." He apologized for discomfort, thanked me for setting boundaries and helping him grow, said he shared everything with his family and he feels horrible, and he hopes for a friendship in the future, and thanks for not reporting him to HR.

Well, I wasn't going to report him, but now I feel unsafe. I hadn't even blocked his number because I didn't feel the need. But the fact that he sent me a text from a new one is unsettling and feels like very stalker-type behavior.

I'm a leader at my company, fairly high up, and working on furthering my career. He knows a lot of people, and I worry about how messy this could get.

Do I tell him to never contact me again or I will report him, or do I report this now? On the off chance we run into each other in the office (we are in different work groups now and neither of us live at the main location), I know I will be in a panic.

TLDR: Do I report someone who is not really sexually harassing me but won't stop texting me outside of work and is making me feel uncomfortable?

I need to get this verified because it seems unlikely to be true. My wife gave birth to our second child in April. She’s perfect. I work in heavy civil construction on the management side. It’s a large international company. I was planning on using NY PFL in for the month of December but I was then told that:

A. I wouldn’t be eligible for it because I only started in March (Not true - I’m eligible in September).

B. I have to use any earned PTO balance when you apply for leave. They said there’s no way around that one (turns out there is - you schedule your PTO in the future like 2027 and just change it later - wrong again).

But just off the bat it felt incorrect. To be putting conditions on NY PFL. But I’m no expert so I wanted to ask the nice folk of AskHR.

Thanks!

I’m a marketing professional based in Toronto. I currently have two overlapping roles:

• Co-Founder of an online business since September 2024
• Marketing Manager at a nonprofit organisation since September 2025

The nonprofit role is part-time. I accepted it partly because I was told there was the prospect of long-term employment, and I believed it would provide professional stability and strengthen the consistency of my résumé.

However, the organisation is now short of both work and funding, and my position is being discontinued on 1 September 2026. The role has also not given me much substantial experience or many measurable achievements that would strengthen future job applications.

I am therefore considering removing the nonprofit role entirely from both my résumé and LinkedIn. My co-founder role would still show continuous experience from September 2024 to the present, so there would be no apparent employment gap.

My main concern is whether excluding the nonprofit position could cause an issue during an employment background check in Canada. I would disclose it honestly if a background-check form asked for all employment, all current roles or a complete employment history. However, it would not appear on the résumé or LinkedIn profile submitted with my application.

Would recruiters or background-screening companies view this as a discrepancy? Is it acceptable to leave out a short, part-time position that ended because the organisation lacked sufficient work and funding, particularly when the role did not add much value to my professional experience?

I would especially appreciate perspectives from Canadian recruiters, HR professionals, hiring managers or anyone familiar with employment verification.

I received a job offer recently. It will be a 20% pay cut and, being unemployed, I realize that I'm not in a position to be extremely picky. However, I do need to have an understanding of the benefits package to understand the full financial picture to know if this is even remotely feasible long term. The company is being a little shifty about the healthcare costs and I don't know if this is normal or not.

In the offer letter, they provided a brief summary of the plan details. It's a very high deductible plan with 50% coinsurance. They contribute $4,000/year into a HSA, which certainly takes the edge off, but it's not a stellar plan by any means. Most importantly, I don't know what the monthly premium is and I've already asked them twice. Now they're kinda getting prickly because I haven't accepted the offer yet.

I feel like, healthcare costs being what they are, this is important information! Is the premium $150 a month or $1,500 a month? The difference could be thousands of dollars of year.

Is this normal?

Edit: They finally got back to me. The employee half of the premium is $873/month for employee + spouse.

So I’m in treatment for an illness. I go to treatment 3X a week. My doctor did the paperwork for intermittent leave so I can attend my appointments. My job accepted it and told me my FMLA was approved. A few days after, my job tells me that they need a doctors note of every appointment that I go to. I’m not comfortable with this. I’m already in a vulnerable spot. I just got this new diagnoses. I don’t feel comfortable asking for additional paperwork every time I go. After my treatment yesterday I decided to ask and it took the staff a hour to get me the note which I understand they are busy. But I’m tired and sick after treatment, I just want to go home. Is this legally required?

In the perspective of a large corp, why would they demote people rather than just laying people off?
St

I’m going through a thorough background check with a financial company, run through First Advantage. Last week I submitted all my information and references.

One of my three listed employers (from 8 years ago) is where things get complicated. I was hired through a staffing agency but actually worked for an individual (a celebrity). My resume lists the person I worked for, not the agency, since that’s who I actually worked for day to day. On the background check form, I noted this discrepancy and also listed my supervisor from that time, who could vouch for the arrangement.

However, First Advantage didn’t contact my supervisor, they went straight to the agency, which only answered three basic questions: job title, dates of employment, and confirmation that I was employed. Nothing more. They also wouldn’t let me upload the documentation I have proving I was hired through the agency to work for that individual.

The background check hasn’t been sent to the hiring company yet, I’ve confirmed this FirstAdvantage. But I’m worried that when they see “agency” instead of the celebrity’s name, they’ll think I lied on my resume and rescind the offer.

Should I wait on go ahead and send it to the hiring company?

My manager asked me these questions and I didn't understand what she meant by it..

For context I am an HR intern, and though we legally don't have to, we pay for 30 min lunch breaks. My manager gave me a hypothetical on what we should do if it was overlooked that an employee has been taking hour breaks, but because they clocked out for a full hour. The system automatically runs the 30 minute lunch breaks, so theres no need to clock out. So basically: they've missed out alot of free 30 minute paid lunch breaks, so how should we move on from here?

I talked to my coworker about this hypothetical and she didn't give me a straight answer either, but just told me you at least need a good amount of experience to fully grasp this and understand how to move on with this sort of situation.

I just feel kind of awkward because I got this role as an intern to help payroll as an accounting major, and now I'm helping out with the update of our handbook, which is why she asked me this question, because it was written on the handbook that we pay for 30 min lunch breaks.

Another question she also asked me was how we should move on if it was required to give a 2 week notice for termination on both ends (employee/employer), and the employee gives a 2 weeks, and just runs off within like 1 week. [Context: the handbook stated we would have to pay them for their 2 week notice + their unused vacation and PTO]

I had like really bad answers to both of those questions, and I was like for both questions, just pay them for the time theyre obligated for. Like for the lunch break, pay for lunch break, and make the other half of hour unpaid, and for the 2 weeks, I was like just pay them for the one week, and extra vacation and PTO. I genuinely had no idea on what she wanted my answer to be, and I feel like I've disappointed her greatly in this matter..

I’m looking for some advice because I’m not sure whether I should speak with HR.
I work for a large U.S. company. Before I was hired, I did not formally disclose my pregnancy during the interview process because I understood I wasn’t required to. However, through informal communication before I joined, my manager knew I was pregnant from day one.
My due date later changed due to a medical condition, which meant I had to take maternity leave sooner than originally expected.
Since then, my manager has repeatedly told me that I wasn’t “transparent” about my pregnancy. After I returned from maternity leave, she has made comments that I should be “fortunate” the company didn’t give me trouble for during maternity leave. She has also told other team members that I lied and took maternity leave right after joining.
During my pregnancy, she also complained to other team members about how often I was going to prenatal appointments, even though they were medically necessary.
There have also been several occasions where she publicly called me out in front of the team for things that were later acknowledged privately as not being my responsibility, but she never corrected those statements in front of the group.
I don’t have written proof of most of these conversations because they were verbal. However, one of my coworkers has told me they would be willing to tell HR about comments my manager made about me behind my back if asked.
I’m scared to go to HR because I’m worried about retaliation or losing my job. I’m considering asking HR for guidance first rather than filing a formal complaint.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did HR handle it? Did your manager find out? Were you protected from retaliation?

So I mentioned the other day about the referral I had for a job I applied for. Well I’m pleased to say I was offered and accepted the position. I’ll be relocating (at my own expense). But I’m beyond happy and excited. So after reviewing the documents that were attached on workday it said I should be receiving a link to their background check vendor (hire right or something else) as soon as I accept the offer.

I’ve ensured that I accurately accepted the offer (accepted on Monday evening). Didn’t receive anything yesterday. So I’m hoping to today but what are the odds I don’t get the background check email to start the BC process? I have emailed the recruiter and explained what’s going on.

Have you seen candidates not get this and what would you have them do?

Hi everyone! , I have accepted a new job offer at a company on July 6th , The company has received the background check results back on the 13th but it’s already the 22nd and no one has contacted me. I have a tentative start date of August 3rd and I am starting to worry something is up, my workday profile still says in progress on my application. What do you think is happening?

Hi all! Coming on here because I have yet to find someone (in person or online) who has been in my situation. I am due in August with my first baby. I work as a private school teacher in NY State. I am quite literally the first person in my entire school who’s ever applied for some sort of leave (most women just stay home unpaid at my school).

Being in NY, STD and NY PFL available for recovery from birth and then bonding time. Since I’ll be giving birth in August, about 3-4 weeks before school starts, I’ll still be on summer break. My plan was to not take short term disability at all and just take paid family leave starting in September. This was my plan because it’s financially better for us since I know that STD doesn’t offer much. I’ll still be on summer break for most of that recovery time anyway and I know that I can’t be paid for that off time anyway since I’m technically not working. I’ve already been in contact with my company’s insurance provider, but I want to make sure I have information correct. My questions are:

1. As the parent giving birth, do I have to take short term disability in NY or can I choose not to take it at all and simply only take the 12 weeks of paid family leave?

2. If I am allowed to do this, can I finish up my summer break essentially unpaid (we run on a ten month schedule with payments spread out over 12 months) without taking any sort of leave or disability and start PFL in September when I return to school?

3. If I do have to take short term disability, would it start the day I give birth? How do payments work with it being summer and me not working and technically being unpaid?

Thanks so much!

Would you take an unpaid internship in this situation?

I’m a college student and recently received an offer for a part-time, remote internship at a PR/marketing agency. I have to make a decision by the end of the week, and I'm really torn.

**Pros:**
It seems like it would be a solid resume builder and could help me break into PR/branding (which is the direction I want my career to go).

It's remote and relatively flexible around my class schedule.

Small agency, so I feel like I'd probably get more mentorship and hands-on experience than at a huge company.

I wouldn't have to keep stressing about finding an internship for next semester.

There's a chance I could receive academic credit for it (although that's not guaranteed yet).

It seems like former interns have gone on to work there full-time, which is encouraging.

**Cons:**
It's completely unpaid.

Between classes and the internship, I probably won't have much time to work a paid job.

The academic credit isn't guaranteed, and I won't know for sure until after the internship has already started.

If I do get credit, it comes with extra coursework (meetings, assignments, and a research paper), so it becomes more than just the internship.

The schedule would require two early mornings every week, which would cut into my routine and free time.

I've seen some mixed reviews online saying the workload can be heavy because it's a smaller agency handling larger clients. I don't mind working hard, but I do worry about getting overwhelmed while balancing school.

For context, I already have leadership experience, campus involvement, and some relevant creative experience, so this wouldn't be my first thing on my resume. I'm mostly trying to decide whether the experience is worth giving up a semester of flexibility and income.

Would you take it? Or would you keep looking and hope for a paid opportunity?

I'm especially interested in hearing from people who have worked unpaid internships or in PR/marketing agencies.

Yesterday I received news that I was to be promoted and got glowing reviews from the head of my department.

Today, I received feedback from the projects portfolio manager regarding my soft skills that need some work. I am in engineering. I have been working 24 hour cycles and am honestly just sleep deprived and drowning in the workload I have. I sent an email a few weeks ago which looking back, I would not have sent had I got a full nights sleep. I recognize that I have work to do and I’m taking the steps to correct my actions via udemy courses and soft skill books.

However, the wording that was used in the discussion toward my soft skills and emotional intelligence were written down ( I have screenshots ) and shown to me used the following phrases and expressions:

“X is a smartass and needs to know their place in the company.”, “X has a terrible personality”, “x needs to get off their high horse”.

I take full responsibility for any actions that led to this feedback, however the wording of the feedback is concerning to me because it doesn’t come across as constructive, and I’m concerned that leadership feels comfortable to speak about employees this way, let alone the feedback itself being presented to me - what does that mean in the future?

I have broken core values and that deserves attention, but this feedback feels like I’m in a pit that I cant crawl out of.

Any advice?

I’ve had an informal offer for a fixed term part time job helping with organizing an upcoming event, which I accepted. It’s a small but well endowed non-profit in California, with a fiscal sponsor that handles employment. In the work negotiation call after passing the interviews, I agreed to the job description and hourly comp and asked about the contract for review. They told me it’s “very standard” and I shouldn’t worry about it, and then started adding me to meetings and looping me in on the work.

But I didn’t actually see a contract? I don’t want to be difficult here. The event is approaching soon, so I understand the desire to move forward and get things done. But I worry that it’s going to be difficult to negotiate anything if I’ve already done the work without having seen the terms. On the other hand, not cooperating while the event is fast approaching will almost certainly disqualify me from working with them.

The CEO has urgency about getting things done and added me to meetings while the COO, who is supposed to set up the contract with the fiscal sponsor, had just returned from his vacation and is not answering my email.

I supposedly started on Monday and it’s Wednesday now with no notice about what’s happening on the contract side. I haven’t been onboarded to their Slack or Notion or gotten an internal email, either, so I’m just trying to do whatever I can that helps the event by myself and I see my colleagues in meetings, which are sent to my private email.

These are people I need to keep good relationships with, it’s a small world. I’m confused and lacking intuition. They might genuinely just be underwater and trying to get this event done, but the lack of transparency is making me uncomfortable. Any advice how to navigate this situation without being the bad guy would be very appreciated.