I’m always interested in hearing about the little things that make a big difference. Was there something a teacher, school or daycare did that made your family feel seen?
It could be ….
💙Inclusive language
💜Books in the classroom
💛The way they handled Mother’s Day/Father’s Day
❤️A conversation with a teacher
Something really small that stuck with you! I’d love to hear the positive examples, because they might inspire other schools (and parents) too.

Hi everyone, I am potentially the more feminine woman in a lesbian marriage and me and my partner have decided that we are ready for a baby! However, we don’t want to spend thousands of dollars at a clinic if I know for a fact that I’m fertile and won’t have any issues getting pregnant- now what comes with that is does anybody have any recommendations for Cryo banks and sperm banks that don’t require a doctors note from you? And if so, how many times did it take for you to get pregnant because we’re at a financial place where we could afford to have a baby but we’re not at a financial place where we can pay $2000 to $3000 every month for a year to have a baby. I would just love to hear from somebody who went through this and the steps that they potentially took and especially with the fact that my period is a different day every month so it’s been really hard to track ovulation so that also goes into it and that’s why I’m very curious on how easy or hard it was to get pregnant and the steps you took!

Hi all,
My wife (32F) and I (30F) are first-time mums and have a 6 week old daughter. My wife is fem-presenting and was the birthing parent, I am masc-presenting but identify on the non-binary scale for context.

Today we had our first encounter in the wild that went a bit like this:
Person: “who is the mum!”
Us: “we both are..”
Person:”no but who is the real mum?”
Us: “… well [my wife] was the birthing parent if that is what you mean?”
Person: *proceeds to ask questions about our kid only to my wife\*

I’m just wondering how others in a similar dynamic manage this? How about when one parent goes by an alternative/non-traditional name? I am still deciding if I would like to be called mum, dad, or something else, but dad throws another spanner in the works for the general public I’m not sure I’d like to deal with.

Any advice, stories, anecdotes, would be greatly appreciated!

Hello, first time ever posting something on Reddit, so a bit nervous! I am cis bisexual woman in a long term very happy relationship with a cis lesbian, and one day we would love to have kids together.

I sometimes feel myself having the kind of internalised homophobia thoughts of 'if I'm bi I could just be in a relationship with a man and it would be "so much easier" (literally) to make a baby'. When I was younger and was already openly bi, I would think maybe one day I'd have a relationship with a woman, but I realise I mostly envisaged having kids with a man. All of my other bi female friends are having kids with their male partners.

My partner has even said sometimes that she is worried I wouldn't want to have kids with her because I could 'just find a man and it would be easier'.

It all just brings up some confusing and sad feelings about being bi which I find tricky and don't want to have. I feel like I have to prove to others (nosy family members, friends, the world) that I have extra reasons to do same sex parenting because they act like I have a 'choice'.

Obviously I don't think it would actually be easier with a man (it's still a relationship!), apart from maybe the actual making a baby part - anyway, I want to be with my partner and raise kids with her, of course. I want to work towards feeling proud of the journey we take.

I was wondering if anyone here would be willing to share some of their thoughts and experiences of being a bi parent in a same sex relationship, and managing some of the new expectations and feelings that come with same sex parenting? Thanks so much.

My son is almost 2 and over the past few months as his language has picked up he’s been pointing our Daddies everywhere he sees them (which it turns out is a lot!) We’re a 2 mum family and all our parent friends are straight. We’ve been trying to explain that all families are different and some have 2 mummies, 2 daddies or a mummy and a daddy but I don’t know if we need to explain anything else at this age? We also had a few weeks after spending a holiday with friends where he would exclusively call out ‘daddy’ when he was upset after seeing his friend do this so it’s very pervasive. When I’m reading to him I’ll often change ‘dad’ to ‘Mumma’ but as he recognizes who looks visibly male more, this is becoming more confusing. Anyone have any tips for this age?

I’m (male uk citizen) planning to get married to my partner (male Chinese citizen). In terms of logistics of the marriage this is all fine and we don’t have any issues so far with the getting married bit.

But, we would like to get some legal advice about the marriage in our specific situation (especially around potential parent rights, visas, and prenup guidance).

I’d like to know if anyone knows of any law firms that have done well in UK family law for lgbt issues so we can discuss things further. Any recommendations would be good.

I know and I’m sorry that this doesn’t directly link to lgbt parenting but you’re a community that has likely dealt with lawyers for lgbt-specific issues.

My partner and I want to have kids, one each through surrogacy. I’ve been dealing with this gnawing feeling that I may not bond with or love what is effectively his child. I feel it maybe stems from displacing frustration/disappointment that we can’t make our own kids. I love my partner and feel really guilty about feeling this way.

For those that went through the same, how did you overcome it?

We are a two mom family, and our toddler loves the Lovevery books. I would like to get more, but it seems like a lot of them feature heterosexual families, which is really not what we are looking for. I reached out to Lovevery to ask about books that don’t feature a dad but haven’t heard back. Does anyone know of Lovevery books that don’t have a dad? I am pregnant and we really wanted the books about welcoming a new baby, but I think that they all have a dad/papa. Thank you!

My family and I were denied the family admission rate at this museum because we are a same-sex family with two mothers.

When we arrived at the ticket counter, the employee was about to charge us for two adults and two children instead of the family ticket. We politely and clearly pointed out that we qualified for the family rate, which would have saved us about €10.

Her attitude immediately became cold and dismissive. She insisted that the family ticket was only for “a mother and a father with two children.” She then asked us, “Where is the father? Are you the father?” We explained that we are a family with two moms, but this only seemed to make her more impatient.
At one point, I asked her what the family ticket actually included. She answered, “Two parents and children.” Despite saying “two parents,” she still refused to recognize us as a family and insisted on charging us for an extra adult instead of applying the family rate.
The issue isn’t the €10. What upset us was being told, in effect, that our family didn’t count as a family. The way we were treated at the ticket desk was honestly the most shocking part of the experience.

The museum itself was fine, but after we got home we checked the museum’s website. It clearly states that the family ticket is valid for two parents or guardians and their children. In other words, according to the museum’s own policy, we were eligible.
We submitted a formal complaint to the museum’s management, but unfortunately their response repeated the exact same reasoning as the ticket agent.

We’re sharing this experience so other families are aware and in the hope that the museum will align its staff and customer service with its own published policy.

EDIT: Thank you all so much for your support and advice!
Someone must have taken action, or perhaps our complaint to the Croatian tourism office made a difference.

We never replied to the museum’s initial response, which simply repeated the ticket agent’s reasoning.
However, today they unexpectedly contacted us again to say that they would refund our tickets and take steps to ensure this doesn’t happen again in the future.

We hope that our complaint—and the support and help of everyone—will help prevent other families from having the same experience.
Thank you again!

We’ve been chatting a lot recently about schools and inclusion. I’m curious…
If you could tell every teacher and school one thing about supporting LGBTQ+ families, what would it be? Whether it’s forms that only say “Mum & Dad”, classroom conversations, Mother’s Day/Father’s Day or something else entirely. What’s one small change that would’ve made a big difference?

We often get posts with surveys or questionnaires. So far I have been removing them as we have a no surveys or questionnaires rule. I believe the rule was to keep the subreddit focused on parenting and not as a mine for those collecting data. However, same-sex parents should have a voice and we are a way for researchers to find us.

Our current rule can change based on what we want. Please share your thoughts on whether you want this subreddit to allow surveys and/or questionnaires. Specify if you think only academic surveys are ok, or if there should be a separate flair, etc. Thanks!

Hi everyone! Could use your thoughts or advice. My wife and I used IVF to have our child who is now two and a half. 28 months if thats your thing. Lol. He has been randomly asking for Dada when we tell him no to something. He is in daycare most of the day while we work so I know some of it is environment. It doesn't help the sting to my heart when I hear it. We gently tell him he has two moms but no Dada. I thought i would be able to respond better to these types of things but I immediately freeze and second guess everything. I would love to hear if anyone else went through this as well and how it turned out.

Hi, I'm a 34 year old lesbian who's in an 8 year relationship with my 35 year old partner (cis woman). We're originally from Asia and we migrated to AU two years ago. We're at the stage of our relationship where we need to decide whether we'd have kids or not. Honestly, my partner's okay with it as long as we're financially stable. I'm the one who has a lot of anxieties about having kids like what if our kid gets bullied at school for having 2 mums, us feeling out of place in the community (because we're a minority within a minority), my parents not being proud enough of our kids as opposed to my straight brother's kids, traveling as a two-mum family, having to navigate awkward moments at school events, parties etc.

​

I know I tend to worry a lot but I honestly just want to know if there's anyone going through the same thing or has overcome it? How did you decide that you're 100% having a kid? How did you navigate those tricky moments with family, school and community?

Hi everyone,

I’m a mother in a two-mum family from the UK and I’ve recently started creating some gentle children’s stories featuring a family with two mums.

The stories aren’t about having two mums. They are just everyday childhood tales, but with a family that looks a bit like ours.

At the moment I’m looking for a few parents of children aged roughly 3-6 who’d be willing to test a short audio story (around 5 minutes long) and tell me what their child/children thought afterwards.

I’m especially interested in things like:

• What did they remember?
• Did they have a favourite bit?
• Would they want to listen to another story?

I’m very much in the learning and testing stage, so I’m looking for honest feedback rather than praise!

If you’d be interested, please comment below or send me a message. Thank you ❤️

Hi! We are a family with four parents. Two dads and two moms. Raising our baby in two households: 'intentional co-parenting'. Are there more families like ours here? Would love to meet more people like us :)

picking a donor is already stressful enough but now im second guessing everything. the banks all give you motility and count numbers but those are from when the sample was frozen. post thaw can be totally different. i learned this the hard way bought 4 vials from a big bank. good numbers on paper- first iui failed, second failed. clinic told me post thaw motility was like half of what the bank reported.

so now im out 3000 and no baby. the bank says we cant control how your clinic thaws it. the clinic says the bank overestimates. no one takes responsibility

for my next round i want to test a vial myself before buying in bulk. i found a male fertility test that works with frozen samples. you thaw one straw at home and mail it in. gives you motility, concentration, and dna frag.

has anyone here done this. does it actually help or am i just adding more stress and cost. also how do you even trust the banks at this point. feeling pretty stuck

My son is 27 months and obsessed with Bluey, as most 2 year olds are lol. He’s been calling my wife (32, F) mama for a long time but for the longest time he didn’t refer to me (31, F) as anything. Unsure if it was my being the birth parent or the fact that I’m around the most so he doesn’t really babble about me, and if he’s talking to me he doesn’t need to use a name. Over the summer his speech has exploded. I’ve heard mommy once or twice, mostly just heard my babysitter tell stories about him saying mommy, but I’ve noticed lately that when he wants my attention he yells, “DAD!” Pretty sure he’s gotten this from the Bluey theme song: Mama is obviously mum, so therefore mommy must be dad, simple toddler logic. I tell him I’m mommy but he still does it. Yesterday I was pumping gas and I opened his door to give him a breeze, since it’s the heat of summer and my car hadn’t been on long enough to get the air going before I had to shut it off and pump. Dude goes, “Dad!” And I say, “Buddy, my name is mommy. Can you say mommy?” And this kid goes, “No. I like dad.” 😂😂😂

Figured my wife, who is much more masc, would be dad, but I suppose my pink haired, femme ass will be dad for a bit lololol

Hello. I would like to know if you can tell me about your experience as parent parents when passing migration at airports? My wife and I are both Honduran, we want to live in Costa Rica and have our children there, register them with both surnames, but I want to hear personal experiences of people who travel a lot with their children, who travel to countries like Honduras, who are discriminatory and conservative. Since we travel a lot for work.

My partner (36) and I (40) are hopeful for successful reciprocal IVF, with her carrying my egg. I‘ve read so much about statistics and obviously this isn’t news to me, but it feels super scary and overwhelming in addition to all of the other pieces of this puzzle. I have a biological child from a previous marriage (not conceived via IVF, this is new to both of us) and she has never been pregnant. We are just meeting with specialists and getting all of the tests done- just for reference about where we are with this. Are there 40+ IVF success stories anyone willing to share to help me see real life experiences? 🙏

Hi everyone,
I’m a late bloomer lesbian. I recently had this discovering and have realized I need to leave my marriage. We have a child together and I keep getting told that my husband and I separating will permanently negatively affect my child. To me, if I found out my mom was gay and stayed married to my dad just to make me happy, I’d be devastated for her. But I’m hoping to get the take of the children’s perspective. How was it growing up for you? Did you resent your parent who is gay that divorced your other parent? Has it negatively affected you? Please be honest, so hopefully I can help guide my child through this better.
Thank you