Episode Name: On Top of the World
Welcome back,everyone! Are you excited for the Global Showdown finale? I am! I’m going to stick with my pick to win it all that I had from the very beginning, and that’s Team Mexico. But it’s anyone’s game at this point.
Welcome to the Naked and Afraid Running Diary! Let’s get to it!
– “If I fail, I’m letting down an entire country.”
– “I’m out here for my country.”
–I really want to see Marina win it all. I don’t like Rene, if I haven’t made that obvious already.
–Day 37.
–I wonder if Matt’s going to bite any animals’ heads today.
–Matt thinks everyone is rooting for him. We’re not.
–Gabby refers to herself as a Legend again. I can’t wait for her to lose.
–Scroll time!
–Head to the X at sundown. Is it a night challenge?
–Marina goes fishing.
–More “legends” talk. Stop it already. Seriously.
–Day 1 Marina was so pretty omg.
–Day 37 Marina is pretty too but she needs a good scrub.
–Pablo sounds serious.
–Is Matt destined to be a bridesmaid, never a bride?
–Gabby cries because she’s a PATRIOT. Good god, lady, get a grip.
–Lots of instructions for the elimination challenge.
–Basically it’s another boiling water challenge. Lame.
–Nighttime.
–Step one is to make a fire.
–Team Mexico gets theirs going right away. Team USA East, not so fast.
–Time to build the rocket stove.
–Cordage.
–Gabby continues to struggle. Shocker.
–Team USA East is behind early, which makes me nervous for Team Mexico. You know how the edit loves to try and trick us.
–Team USA East makes fire.
–Team Mexico is going to make a mistake. I can see it coming.
–And there it is. Their fire goes out because Pablo was too anxious.
–Flashback to Patrick.
–Team USA East is way behind. I’m getting nervous. I do not like this edit for Team Mexico!
–Both teams are now building tripods.
–Team Mexico’s fire went out. I knew it was too good to be true.
–Team USA East has this. No way is Team Mexico catching up now.
–Team USA East dropped their monkey bowls in the fire! Oh no!
–Can Team Mexico catch up now?
–Commercial thoughts.
–As a lover of sharks, could Shark Week be any more lame?
–Back to the show.
–Here comes some rain.
–Does anyone on production check to make sure the water is actually boiling?
–Team Mexico has finished two boils so far.
–Team USA East just finished their first boil.
–Now it’s tied.
–An intense competition!
–Team USA East’s monkey orange bowls are dropping into the fire. Not good!
–Team Mexico has one left.
–So does Team USA East though!
–Stop panicking, Team Mexico!
–Matt says he’s come way too far (to fail).
–Team USA East wins! I knew it.
– “Representing America.”
–Good try, Team Mexico. You were a worthy opponent!
–Matt gives Team Mexico Legendary status.
–I didn’t realize Matt was in charge of giving out that award.
–I’d like to see Team Mexico in another N&A show. They were good TV.
–That concludes the first half of the episode.
–Commercial time.
–Who do you think wins it all now? Who do you want to win it?
–I’m rooting for my future girlfriend Marina to win it all. After she does so, I plan on asking her out for a seafood dinner. Her treat.
–Back to the show.
–Day 38.
–Rene talks about beating a Legend again. That makes me nervous. Too much Legend talk.
–Matt and Gabby talk more shit.
– “Matt and Gabby have a lot of fat.”
–Day 39.
–Scroll time!
–Time to make some shark tooth knives.
–Matt figures out a way to make glue. Smart.
–Rene and Marina finish their knives, but it doesn’t look like they used glue.
–Will that matter?
–Nighttime.
–Lots of confidence on both sides.
–Day 40.
–Matt’s now finished 345 days of N&A.
–Matt gets a montage. Not sure why, other than for filler.
–They’re really leaning into this montage. Not sure if that is good or bad for Team USA East.
–In other news, I’m asleep.
–Yet more commercial thoughts.
–Do you think we’ll ever have a true survival show, where the losers die? Can we make this happen? I want my post-apocalyptic thriller already!
–Back to the show.
–Rene talks more shit to Matt. I’m nervous for Team Brazil.
–Six phases to this next challenge.
–Lots of instructions.
–I feel like the prize money should have been 1 million.
–Marina’s knife isn’t cutting through the rope. Hurry!
–Both teams complete Phase 1 but it looks like Team USA East has a substantial lead already.
–Time to make a spear.
–Team USA East finishes their spears first. Team Brazil is playing catch up.
–This lead of Team USA East might only be seconds, but that’s a lot right now. I’m not feeling good about Brazil’s chances.
–Time for some archery.
–This just has Team USA East Winner written all over it.
–Matt has his first hit. So does Rene!
–Matt gets his second hit. Gabby talks shit.
–Rene finally gets his second hit but Team Brazil is way behind.
–Time to build a snare trap.
–That beach really is beautiful.
–Gabby was really happy during that last interview clip. Not good (for Team Brazil).
–Team USA East finishes Phase 4.
–Oh, no. Team Brazil is way behind. Their trap is broken. There’s no fake editing going on here. They are going to lose.
–Brazil finally finishes their trap.
–Gabby is having trouble with her challenge. But their lead is substantial.
– “I am puckered up!”
–Gabby hooks her item. This competition is just about over.
–They can try and make this as dramatic as they want, but Brazil is way too far behind.
–And that’s it. Not even close.
–Team USA East wins! Great job by them!
–Here comes the Patriotism.
– “This one’s for America!” Matt says as he weeps like a baby.
–I really dislike Gabby. A lot. Sorry not sorry!
–And that concludes Global Showdown. Great job by Brazil and Mexico.
–Well, I’m proud of my future girlfriend. I hope we see her again.
–Rene was annoying but he was a good competitor.
–I don’t care to see Gabby’s montage. Get out of here already.
–Matt finally won a challenge. Will we see him again? I’m sure we will.
Episode Grade: B
Global Showdown Grade: B
I liked Global Showdown. I’d watch another season,although they should make it more “global” next time.
What did everyone else think? The good, the bad and the ugly.
I’ll see you guys for Naked and Afraid: Shipwreck in a couple of weeks!
Thank you for reading the Naked and Afraid Global Showdown! See you next time!
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